


To Be Human

by OhLothCat (ohlothcat)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: All Jedis Need Therapy, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Quinlan Vos/Asajj Ventress, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Past Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze, Past Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rating May Change, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:41:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 46,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25214833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohlothcat/pseuds/OhLothCat
Summary: The Clone Wars weigh heavy on Obi-Wan. From Qui-Gon to Satine, his world feels heavy with loss. Each day feels as if he is grappling with the code. It is Anakin's job to show him that he is more than just a Jedi Master. He is strong. He is loved. And most of all, he is human.Or, the one where Anakin and Obi-Wan fall in love because they're both too stupid to deal with their emotions like proper adults.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 144
Kudos: 434





	1. The Emerald Box

Obi-Wan watched as a man ordered a glass of ice with his Elba beer. From across the bar, he saw the man count out six ice cubes and drop them in one by one. They sounded like chattering teeth as they collided with the glass. A disheveled wig attempted to disguise the man. He was hiding from someone, or maybe, something. But the force told Obi-Wan that whatever he was running from, it wouldn’t catch up to him anytime soon.

As the man continued to drink, Obi-Wan couldn’t help but think of Satine.

_Alcohol, my dear, should always be enjoyed with grace and class_. _Adding ice only serves to dilute it._

He took a swig of his own Jawa juice. Obi-Wan could practically hear the chime in Satine’s voice as she chastised him. He could see the light in her eyes, a ghost of a smile on her lips. Her blonde hair curled perfectly against her pale skin.

_Force_ , he missed her.

Ever since her death, Obi-Wan frequented the lower levels of Coruscant more often. Amidst the dirt and grime, he could disappear. He could forget the war raging in the clouds above them. Forget the council. The clones. The overwhelming sense of dread that settled deep in his bone marrow. In these bars, he was not a Jedi. He was a man. A man who paid a pretty penny to drink his sorrows away.

The twi'lek bartender topped off his drink with a curt nod. She didn’t know his name, but she did know that he always left a hefty tip. In the lower levels, that’s all that one needed to know, anyway. Obi-Wan took another sip, the alcohol making him feel slightly warmer, less hollow.

_What a pity you can’t see me now, Satine_ , he thought.

The war had weighed heavily on the Jedi master’s heart. Not just with the loss of Satine. But the loss of his friends, his men, his own master. For the past eleven years, it felt as if there was a constant storm thrashing within his skull. He breathed as much of his pain into the force as he could, but there was always that nagging ache. The pull that reminded him of what could have been. If he had left the order. If Qui-Gon had lived. If he had been the master that Anakin deserved.

_Anakin_.

He drained his glass at the thought of his ex-padawan. Obi-Wan once commented that Anakin would be the death of him, and these days, he was starting to very much believe it. Anakin was headstrong, stubborn, and so strong in the force that it made his head spin. During the last mission they were on, he overheard Anakin and Ahsoka bragging about how many droids they shot down. What in the galaxy was he ever going to do with him?

Not bothering to count his credits, he left a pile on the table. He waved goodbye to the bartender and left to find his speeder.

Arriving back at the temple, he entered his quarters with a sigh. Nights like these, he longed for the days when he and Anakin shared an apartment. His padawan might have been loud and left spare parts all over the floor, but at least he helped to quell the loneliness that threatened to consume him. But Anakin was a knight now. And Obi-Wan was a Jedi Master. He’d meditate on his feelings later. Tonight, he wanted to bathe in the surrounding darkness.

Not bothering to turn on the lights, he stumbled to his bed and pulled out a worn leather box. To the council, Obi-Wan was far from sentimental. The box he held told a different story. Opening the lid, he removed a small pocket-sized book. The cover was a faded emerald, deep creases littering the front. It looked well-read, well-loved. It was the first paper book that Obi-Wan had ever seen. The book recounted the tales from the ancient days of the Jedi. Right before Naboo, Qui-Gon had given it to him to read.

_I think you may enjoy these stories, my padawan. Within these tales, there lies wisdom about the living force. I have “borrowed it” from the temple archives, so return it to me whenever you finish reading._

Obi-Wan never got to return it. In fact, he never even brought himself to read it. This book was the only token he had left of his old master. He turned the worn pages in his hands. It was a chapter he could not close, not yet He put the book away and moved to pick up a dried Vormur flower. The scent had long faded, leaving a dried, yellow stem in its wake. Most of the purple petals had shriveled up and died, but a few hung on by a thread. He briefly thought about playing “she loves me, she loves me not” with them. But he decided against it. He knew the answer.

Before he left Mandalore, Satine tucked the flower into the pocket of his robes. With a knowing look, she caressed his cheek, lingering for a second too long.

_Until we meet again, Obi-Wan._

_Until we meet again, Duchess._

Obi-Wan did not attend her funeral. In the weeks following her death, he saw success on the battlefield. He won because he fought like a man who had nothing else to lose. How else was he supposed to honor his dead, pacifist lover after all?

Placing the flower down, he picked up the final trinket in the box, Anakin’s padawan braid. He threaded the hair between his fingers, noting that it was still soft. While watching Anakin become a knight filled him with pride, it did not give him the relief he sought. He thought once he severed the braid, his debt to Qui-Gon would be over. Anakin would be a Jedi. Instead, he felt even more tangled to the boy. Obi-Wan clenched the braid into his fists. He released a shaky breath, trying to fight the tears welling in his eyes.

He couldn’t save Qui-Gon. He couldn’t save Satine. And now, as he watched Anakin drift further away, he did not think he could save him either. There was a darkness in him that Obi-Wan sensed, but could not cure. He did not know how to stop it, to make it go away. He saw the nightmares and the bags that laid under Anakin’s eyes. It was only a matter of time before they both crumbled. Anakin deserved a better Master. He deserved someone who could save him. Tears leaked down his cheeks, and he choked back a quiet sob. He was a Jedi Master. He couldn’t have emotions, let alone cry. But the alcohol that coursed through his veins reminded him that tonight, he was human. He cried for Qui-Gon, for Satine, and for Anakin.

* * *

The next morning, he awoke to someone shaking him roughly. 

“Master? Master? Wake-up!”

With a groan, he opened his eyes to see an anxious-looking Anakin. His brows were furrowed, a frown tugging at his lips. Obi-Wan instantly felt the incoming migraine. 

“You were supposed to train with Snips and me this morning.”

“I apologize Anakin. I must have overslept.”

“You? Oversleep?” Anakin snorted, raking his eyes over Obi-Wan’s crumpled form. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy, the red rings surrounding them making his pale eyes shine. Obi-Wan’s normally neat hair was tousled, standing in all different directions. “It seems like someone had fun at the bar last night instead.”

“Fun is not the word I’d choose” he responded, rubbing at his temples. 

“Well, Snips still wants to train so...” Anakin stopped mid-sentence, “...why is my padawan braid in your hand?”

Obi-Wan froze. The events of the night before flooding in. He quickly dropped the braid onto his bed. His cheeks flushed pink. Anakin stood with his head cocked to the side, looking much like a curious loth-cat. 

“As you said Anakin, a fun night at the bar. I, unfortunately, cannot remember.”  _ So much for being the Negotiator _ , he thought. 

The man in front of him did not look convinced. If anything, he looked even more concerned now. 

“Maybe you should lay off the Jawa juice then.”

“When did you get so wise?”

Anakin laughed and gave a rough pat to his old Master’s shoulder. 

“Did you still want to train with Snips and me?”

Obi-Wan rose from his bed and felt his joints creak as he stretched. His stomach growled and,  _ kriff _ , he needed a shower. He truly was getting too old for this.

“Let me grab some breakfast first and I’ll come and join you.”

  
  


Anakin left, leaving Obi-Wan alone again in his apartment. He rubbed a hand over his face as a bolt of embarrassment shot through him. Not only did he fall asleep with Anakin’s braid, but Anakin  _ saw _ him fall asleep with it. The force always had a funny way of getting back at him.  _ Serves me right, _ Obi-Wan thought,  _ I should have sent my feeling back into the force last night.  _

Peeling off his robes, he stepped into the ‘fresher. The warm water helping to soothe the ache that had spread throughout his body. Obi-Wan had always found peace within water. He liked the fact that you never saw the same body of water twice. Water was always moving, always improving. It both saved and destroyed. As he stepped out, he felt as if he was cleansed from the inside out. He always felt better after a shower. 

After grabbing a protein bar for breakfast, he made sure to put away the leather box. Placing Anakin’s braid back inside, he closed the lid and stored it back under his bed. He needed to find another hiding place soon. Clipping his lightsaber to his belt, Obi-wan hoped that Anakin wouldn’t tell Ahsoka. If she knew, so would the entire 501st and 212th. 

He entered the training room to find Anakin and Ahsoka locked in an intense duel. A small crowd of younglings had collected around them. The pair circled each other, their blades creating static in the air. 

“Is that all you got, Skyguy?”

“Don’t get cocky now padawan”

Ahsoka rushed forward, her dual blades swinging rapidly in-front of her. Anakin remained still, waiting until she was a breath away to force jump behind her. Flipping through the air, the younglings around him cheered. As he landed, he flashed a smirk. 

Gritting her teeth, Ahsoka charged again. Blue and green blades danced together. Watching the pair spare was like watching raw energy. Never stagnant, unpredictable, and completely electric. While neither Anakin or Ahsoka seemed to take to his Form III, he was proud to say he helped raise two strong duelists. 

“Yield!” he heard Ahsoka say, watching as Anakin held all three lightsabers in his hands. The younglings around them cheered, congratulating both parties on their technique. 

“So you see younglings” Anakin said, turning to his padawan, “I think Ahsoka learned a very important lesson today.”

“I did?” 

“Yes, you did Snips. You learned to never let your pride get in the way and that your Master always wins.”

Ahsoka gave Anakin a shove, a grin spreading on her face. 

“We’ll see about that last part, Master.”

Since the duel was over, the small crowd around them dispersed. Anakin and Ahsoka waved goodbye to them, telling them they could always count on a show from them. Shaking his head with a laugh, Obi-Wan walked towards the pair. 

“Master Kenobi! You’re alive!” Ahsoka said. 

“I didn’t know they presumed me dead.”

“No offense Master, but I have never seen you oversleep...ever. When you didn’t show, I assumed that you had to be dead.”

Obi-Wan laughed. 

“Even the greatest Jedi Masters oversleep sometimes.”

“I’m just glad you’re not dead.”

“I’m indifferent.” Anakin cut in, his tone light. 

“Thank you, Ahsoka. It looks like I’ll be sparing with Anakin first then.”

Fighting with Anakin was very much like trying to tame a wild beast. There was a technique, a rhythm to encase the chaos. But every fight brought a new variable. You cannot catch the same beast twice. He always let Anakin strike first. Obi-Wan liked to watch the way he could see the battle plan being mapped in Anakin’s eyes. In a split second, he watched as Anakin built his attack. 

Bringing his saber down in one fast motion, Obi-Wan quickly blocked the blade right above his head. No matter how many times they duel, he may never get used to the fact that Anakin is now taller than him. Pushing Anakin off of him, he leaped backward. He spun his sabers in front of him, signaling Anakin to strike again. 

He rushed again, running towards him at full speed. Their blades clashed, a shock wave spreading in the room. They knew each other’s next move before they made them. It was an old dance to them, a routine they could never break. 

They both yelled “yield” at the same time. 

By the end of their session, all three of them were panting and out of breath. In a sick way, they all missed the adrenaline that came from missions. Yes, the battlefield was horrific. But there was something intoxicating about dancing between the line of life and death. Sparring allowed them to feel  _ something _ during the downtime between missions. 

“Master Kenobi, any word on when we’re being sent out yet?” Ahsoka asked, clipping her sabers to her belt. 

“The council will most likely send out us within the next few days. They’re finishing gathering intel for our next assignment”. 

“At least they’re doing most of the legwork” Anakin said, “You both know how much I hate recon”. 

“Believe me Anakin, this mission will most likely involve lots of violence and blowing things up.  _ Your speciality _ ”. 

“I learned all my tricks from the best”. 

Obi-Wan gave a slight smile and shook his head. He wished that Anakin hadn’t learned from him. He wished for so much more for him. 

Ahsoka left the pair, citing that she had some studying to do. Knowing their padawan, both Obi-Wan and Anakin knew that “studying” usually meant doing something against the rules. But they let her go. She would learn her own way eventually. 

Anakin and Obi-Wan left the training room, walking together in silence towards the apartments. The silence between them was comfortable for once, all of their anxiety and tension dissipated in the duels. Between them, it usually felt like thin ice. A delicate layer separating them from impending doom. But today, it felt safe. Warm almost. Obi-Wan basked in it. 

“Master, you seem off.”

“I am tired, that’s all young one.”

“Obi-Wan, I’ve seen you not sleep for 38 hours straight. This isn’t tired.”

Obi-Wan rubbed his neck nervously. He could not think of a lie fast enough. 

“I’m okay Anakin. There’s nothing to worry about.”

He felt a spike of anger flash between their bond. 

“If you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine. But you can’t lecture me about not opening up when you don’t either.”

“Anakin...it’s not like that.”

The other Jedi huffed, rolling his eyes. 

“Sure.”

The lightness between them soured. Obi-Wan could have predicted that though. Peace between them never lasted. The afternoon went by too well. 

As they neared his apartment, Obi-Wan stopped to face Anakin. 

“I apologize for worrying you, Anakin. I am okay.”

Anakin eyed the man up and down. Doubt was plastered all over his face. 

“Whatever you say, Master.”

Obi-Wan collapsed on the couch, his body feeling as if it weighed a million pounds. Of course he would manage to upset Anakin. There was no making that boy happy. Obi-Wan tried for as long as he knew him, and yet, he always came up short. He was no Qui-Gon Jinn. 

Before he could dive further into his thoughts, his comlink buzzed. The council was calling him in to assign him a new mission. 

_ Finally _ , Obi-Wan thought,  _ an escape.  _

  
  
  



	2. Barren Landscapes and Dry Skies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SO sorry for taking a million years to update this! My life has gotten sort of crazy but I'm back on track! The next chapter will be up next week. Thank you all for reading and sticking around. I hope you like the way it's going <3

“Master, it’s really not fair that I’m not allowed to go on this mission.”

“Not fair? Ahsoka, you really are sounding more and more like Anakin by the day.”

Ahsoka huffed in annoyance, crossing her arms. 

“It’s just a scouting mission. I should be going with you.”

“If you didn’t fail your Jedi history assignment, you would have been” Obi-Wan replied, sending a pointed look her way. The togruta rolled her eyes, her lips still in a frown. 

The pair walked in silence. Ahsoka was still scowling and Obi-Wan could not help but laugh to himself. She really was her master’s padawan. He couldn’t recall the amount of times he’s had this same exact conversation, this same exact walk, with Anakin. 

“I was thinking Master” Ahsoka said, “would I be able to go if I re-did the paper before you leave tonight?”

“Nice try” Obi-Wan laughed, “if I allowed that, you’d just learn how to fix your mistakes rather than how to not make them in the first place.”

“But isn’t it important to know how to fix your mistakes too?”

Obi-Wan’s lips tilted up in a slight grin. This was always his favorite part of the conversation. 

“When we’re in battle, you like to go in with a plan and stick to it?”

“Well yes, it makes everything go smoother.”

“Now, what happens when Anakin deviates from the plan?”

“We all scramble until Anakin blows something up and ends the mission.”

“Exactly. Now if Anakin had learned from his mistakes, we wouldn’t have to fear for our lives every 20 seconds.”

Ahsoka finally gave a smile, which Obi-Wan returned. 

“Will you at least promise to call if you need back-up?”

“Deal.”

Ahsoka and Obi-Wan parted ways, the togruta waving as she headed towards the archives. At least it seemed like she was taking Obi-Wan’s discipline to heart. Though, he had an inkling that she was heading to the archives to nap, rather than study. 

The mission the council assigned was simple. There was a moon near Dantooine that could serve as a potential base and they were to scout it out. The council believed that if the moon was hospitable, it could work as an excellent rendezvous point for Outer Rim missions. Make sure there are no Separatists, make peace with any natives living there, make sure Anakin doesn’t destroy the moon, and then report back. Simple. 

He reached his room and fell into bed. They were to leave early tomorrow morning and he wanted to savor as much sleep as he could. 

He met Anakin on the ship, the younger man already in the pilot’s seat. By the amount of oil on his hands, Obi-Wan assumed that he spent much of the night doing last minute “modifications” to the ship. Sitting beside him, Anakin started the engine and began the ascent into space. 

“Ahsoka told me that you gave her the Mistake Talk” Anakin said, breaking the silence that rested between the two. “Apparently you used me to demonstrate the deviation from the plan example. I personally think the Vos version you told me works better.”

“Before you, Vos was one of the most reckless Jedi. You’ve managed to take the number one spot.”

“At least I’m number one at something.”

The ride continued to stretch on. Conversation between the pair was light, ranging from war strategies, to their clones, and to what they were craving from Dex’s. It felt like how it was before the war. They were not General Kenobi and General Skywalker for a moment. They were just Obi-Wan and Anakin.

Obi-Wan savored these moments. It reminded him of how the Jedi were before the war, before they turned into soldiers. 

But war rarely lets peace breathe. The scanners in the ship started flashing, turning the cockpit a burning red. Two large ships were quickly approaching and by the looks of them, they were clearly Separatist. They barely had time to react before the first shot was fired. 

“Why can’t missions just be simple with you?” Obi-Wan asked, gripping the control panel as Anakin weaved between fire. 

“Someone has to keep you young, Master”. 

Their ship was not equipped with the normal blasters that were used on the battlefield. They expected this to be a peace mission, not a fight. It was just their luck that they wound up with two enemy ships on their tail and only two lousy canon blasters. Looking out the window, Obi-Wan watched as red streaks polluted the space around them. He attempted to strike the ships behind him, but the canons were old and the shots they fired were weak as best. 

There was a loud bang and the entire ship veered dangerously to the right. Out the window, the two Jedis watched as bits of their ship floated before their eyes. Alarm sirens blared louder and the red lights continued to flash. 

“Master, I suggest that you hold on.”

“Anakin, what are you thinking?”

“I’m jumping to hyperspace.”

“You’re jumping to WHAT?”

Obi-Wan braced himself as Anakin slammed the controls to the ship down. Behind them, the enemy ships were becoming smaller. The stars around them blurred together at dizzying speeds. He suspected that whatever additions Anakin made this morning was allowing the ship to move at dangerous speeds. 

With a loud bang, the ship appeared in front of the moon. Instead of slowing down, the ship continued to increase in speed. With every second, the ship seemed to rattle and groan even more. Obi-Wan knew that this was going to be a rough landing...well rougher than normal with Anakin in the pilot’s seat. 

He glanced over to his old padawan as he focused intensely on the controls. He flicked switches and smashed buttons, his eyes never wavering from the wind shield. Anakin’s knuckles were white with the force he was using to keep the ship in check. 

As they entered the atmosphere, Obi-Wan heard pieces of the ship falling off around him. The smell of gasoline and ashes told him that something was on fire. He saw the ground approaching them at an alarming pace. 

His head smashed against the controls as they skidded onto the surface. They slid along the dusty ground until slowly creeping to a halt. Smoke danced around them. Obi-Wan glanced over to Anakin, who was breathing heavily next to him. 

“That was close” he said, running his hands through his hair, “I wasn’t sure what was going to kill us first: the Separatists or your flying.”

“My flying saved our skins.”

“Well it clearly didn’t save our ship.”

“Can’t win them all, Master”.

The pair exited the ship with little grace. Surveying the damage, it was clear that the ship was beyond repair. Not even Anakin could salvage the wreckage. Half the ship was currently on the ground while the other was somewhere floating in space. Obi-Wan hoped that they jumped to hyperspace fast enough because if the Separatists found them, they were as good as dead. 

This wasn’t the first time they found themselves alone on some godforsaken planet. This moon just happened to be more inhabitable than the others. It had more dust clouds than people, the landscape barren and beige. The planet was eerily silent, the only noise coming from the occasional crackle and sizzle from their wrecked ship. 

Reaching out in the force, Obi-Wan searched for lifeforms. Luckily enough, it seemed as if he and Anakin were the only ones on the moon. At least he hoped that was true. 

The pair made quick work setting up camp in a series of caves near the crash site. The insides were bone dry, telling the pair that water on this moon must be scarce. Anakin was able to pull their survival packs from the ship: a collection ration packs, a few canisters of water, protein bars, and two ratty sleeping bags. It wasn’t much, but they survived off of worse before. 

After setting up camp, Obi-Wan left to lightly survey the planet around him as Anakin attempted to make contact with the council. He figured that if they were going to be stuck here, he might as well complete the mission. 

The moon was unexciting. A dry landscape, there was no follige or creatures to be seen. Large rock formations covered the surface, creating a labyrinth of caves and outcoves. The Republic would have to do very little construction if they wanted to camouflage themselves. So far, it seemed to be the ideal place for a base. That was the very small silver lining. 

“Any luck in sending a distress signal?” Obi-Wan asked as he returned to what was left of the ship. 

“If I had any luck in the past two hours, we wouldn’t be stuck on this rock.” Anakin snapped, turning his attention back to his collection of wires. 

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and set off to find anything to start a fire with. They were lucky enough to have landed near a set of caves. But the chill starting to creep into his bones told him that nights on this planet may not be forgiving. Seeing that the moon was mainly made of rocks, he opted to take some cushions from the wreckage and use them as kindling. It wasn’t ideal, but it worked. 

Light dimmed quickly on the moon, taking the temperature with it. He heard Anakin give a grunt of annoyance and stalk his way to the cave. Obi-Wan figured that he must have had no luck getting a signal. Handing Anakin a ration pack, the pair ate in silence. 

As he crawled into his sleeping bag, Obi-Wan realized how hard the ground was. He wished that he saved the cushions to sleep on. Closing his eyes, he tried to find sleep, but his mind was racing. How were they going to get off this planet? What were the nights like? Were the Separatists just around the corner? His thoughts were interrupted by Anakin clearing his throat.

“Hey Obi-Wan” Anakin said from the other side of the fire, “Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“Why were you holding my padawan braid a few days ago?”

Obi-Wan sighed, mentally cursing. He was too exhausted to lie and he didn’t want a fight. If he and Anakin were going to be stuck here for a while, he didn’t need the other man hating him. 

“I was remembering the days before the war.” 

“Do you think about those times often?”

“I try not to.” 

He could hear Anakin rustling in his sleeping bag, clearly wanting to get something off his chest. 

“I wish Ahsoka didn’t have to grow up during a war. She should be trying to sneak out of the temple, not trying to sneak her way into missions.”

“I couldn't agree more Anakin. I fear that this war has taken more of a toll than we all care to admit.”

“What do you mean by that, Master?”

_ God dammit Obi-Wan you shouldn’t have said that _ , he thought to himself, _ You really need to release more into the force.  _

“I just meant that I long for the times when Jedis were not generals, but peacekeepers. That’s all.”

“We’ll win this war quickly. We’ve made so much progress.”

“Let’s hope.”

Obi-Wan fell asleep soon after to the sound of a dying fire and the soft sounds of his padawan’s breathing. 


	3. The Will of The Force

Light streamed into the cave, waking Obi-Wan. He groaned as he felt his stiff joints. Sleeping on the ground never did him any favors. Standing up to stretch, he saw that Anakin was waking up as well. Walking to the mouth of the cave, he noticed that the environment did not change at all. No dramatic rainstorms. No overnight fires. No hurricanes. So far, the moon seemed to be predictable and Obi-Wan greatly appreciated that. The last thing he needed was to try and survive a random snowstorm. 

After a breakfast of protein bars, he and Anakin decided to do more surveying of the moon. Obi-Wan had covered a good section the previous day, but there was still more to explore.

“This moon reminds me of a worse version of Tatooine” Anakin said, kicking a few stray rocks in front of him, “Nothing for miles.”

“At least there isn’t any sand here.” That earned him a laugh from Anakin. 

Anakin’s laugh was something that he heard very little of these days. Every time he heard it, Obi-wan stored the sound away in his mind, always wanting to relive it for a second longer. When Anakin truly laughed, it reached all the way up to his blue eyes. They’d shine for a moment, overcasting the turmoil of emotions that normally swam in his irises. 

And Obi-Wan reveled in it. 

His laugh reminded him of his times with Qui-Gon. A time before he was preoccupied with battle strategies and clones and the overarching threat of the sith. He was reminded of the times when he and his master would sit in the gardens meditating, the pair finding equal solstice in the force. 

_ Oh how he missed it.  _

The pair continued to walk, pointing out rock formations that looked like different objects. Anakin swore a large muddy brown one was a spot-on bantha. Obi-Wan failed to see it. 

“Imagine if Ahsoka was here with us” Anakin said as the pair sat atop a collection of rocks, “She would have been bored out of her mind.”

“She would have canvassed the entire moon in an hour.”

“I have no idea how she has so much energy.”

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow, glancing over to his padawan. 

“How do you think I feel?”

Anakin leaned back on the rock, letting the surface warm him back. He crossed his arms above his head. 

“Was I as tiring as Ahsoka?” 

“You were far worse” Obi-Wan laughed, leaning back to join him, “I remember thinking that I lost you while we were on that diplomatic mission to Corellia. It was an incredibly stressful three hours.”

“Master, I told you that I was heading down to the market that day.”

“I thought that you were heading to the market that was down the street from our lodge,  _ not _ the market sixteen blocks over.”

“I came back safe didn’t I?”

“Anakin, I almost tore apart every stand looking for you.”

He was silent for the moment. 

“Were you really that worried for me?”

“Of course I was, it’s my job to protect you.”

Silence rested between them as they laid atop the rock. The climate was mild, allowing them to relax without feeling like they were going to roast alive. By this point, Obi-Wan had figured that the Separatists did not follow them here. Any good general would have investigated the crash site by now. He kept his saber on his person at all times though, just in case. 

The pair laid in the sun for a while, both lost in their own thoughts. It was serene and to Obi-Wan, it almost felt like a vacation. 

The next few days passed in a very similar manner. They’d each wake up when the sun crept in their cave. They’d eat their protein bars, walk a few miles, maybe do some light sparring, and while Obi-Wan prepared the fire, Anakin messed around with parts from the ship, hoping to create a new transmitter. 

Tonight, they both sat around the fire. Eating rations was never the ideal meal and they both longed for real food. But they were Jedi. They always made do with what they had. As they finished their meal, they stared into the fire. The embers dancing between them. 

“Um Obi-Wan” Anakin started, his hand rubbing his neck nervously, “Do you know that you talk in your sleep?”

“I do?”

“Yea...and well, you keep saying a very specific phrase every night.”

Obi-Wan’s stomach churned and he felt bile start to rise in his throat. 

“I’m sorry if I’m keeping you awake. I can always find another cave or-”

“No! No!” Anakin cut-in, “It’s honestly fine. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. It’s been every night and you know how I get my nightmares too and-”

“I’m perfectly fine.” 

It was Obi-Wan’s turn to cut him off. If he wasn’t careful his conversation could start leading down a dangerous path. He had already revealed too much a few nights ago. Good Jedi masters did not have nightmares. Good Jedi masters expelled all their feelings into the force, no matter what. 

“I know that you miss her Master.”

Obi-Wan froze, his lungs refusing to work. Beneath him, the ground threatened to swallow him whole. He was supposed to be an example for Anakin and now, it felt like all of his failures were being put on display. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You must be confused.”

“Confused?” he snapped, looking his master dead in the eye, “Every single night you beg for Maul to take you instead of her.”

“You must be mistaken.”

“See? This is why we never get anywhere” Anakin huffed, balling his hands into fists, “ _ I’m _ the one always expected to open up about my feelings and you’re here outright denying them.”

“I’m not denying them because they aren’t there.”

“Look at me and tell me that you never loved her. That Satine meant nothing to you.”

“Anakin, I-”

“And there we have it. Another prime example of Master Kenobi not even following his own expectations.”

“This is different Anakin.”

“Oh please tell me how this is different” he replied, his voice dripping in sarcasm. His blue eyes shone brightly in the dim cave, giving him a crazed look. Around them, the force was heavy with tension. 

“When I tell you to express your feelings, it is because you are being destructive. When you’re upset you act like an insolent child.”

“An insolent child?” barked Anakin, “I’m not sure if you’ve looked in the mirror lately but you’re no better. Being late to training with Snips and I. Being extra wreckless on missions. And let’s not forget the whole drunken padawan braid incident.”

“That’s enough” growled Obi-Wan, his voice low and trembling, “You will not speak on matters that you have no comprehension of. You know nothing about me. You know nothing about Satine. Leave. It. Be.”

“I know nothing about you because you never tell me anything.”

“And I never will. So get used to it.”

Anakin muttered some curses under his breath, rising from his seat. 

“I’m going to try and get the transmitter to work. The quicker I can get off this moon and away from you, the better.”

He stormed out of the cave, taking his lightsaber and robes with him. 

Obi-Wan dropped his head in his hands and sighed. Why did it always have to end like this? Why couldn’t Anakin understand that he just  _ couldn’t _ ? Anakin always had to push the boundary between them. 

He watched Anakin’s shadow from the cave, watching the spare sparks float through the air. He always turned to tinkering when he was angry. It was a more productive way to cope, as he used to just swing his lightsaber and hope to hit something. 

Obi-Wan wondered how Qui-Gon would have handled the situation. He knew that he wasn’t the easiest padawan, but he never fought with his master in the way that Anakin did. Qui-Gon wouldn’t have let his feelings overwhelm him in the first place, Obi-Wan thought. He would have said something about letting his feelings return to the living force. He would have said something wise. He wouldn’t have called him an insolent child, that’s for sure. 

Settling into his sleeping bag, Obi-Wan desperately wished for his master. He just wanted one more conversation. He wanted to ask one more question:  _ How do I continue on when I feel like this? _

Tears pricked at his eyes and he felt his throat close. Allowing himself a few choked sobs, he drifted off to sleep. 

As he woke the next morning, Obi-Wan noticed that Anakin’s spot remained empty. Shaking his head, he got up to start making breakfast for the two of them. He figured that Anakin had fallen asleep outside and he hoped that bringing him food would act as a peace offering. Breaking open the ration pack, he poured a few droplets of water in and watched the meal expand before him. Just like every morning, it was a slice of bread and some form of eggs, though Obi-Wan couldn’t quite place what creature they were from. It was filling nonetheless. 

Obi-Wan’s suspicions were correct when he saw Anakin slumped over a pile of parts. In the morning light, flickers of blonde glinted in his hair. His cloak was wrapped around him like a blanket, making him look as if he was just a padawan again. He had a ghost of a smile on his lips, Obi-Wan hoped that he was having a good dream. It made him feel almost guilty for waking him. 

“Anakin, wake-up.” he said, gently nudging the other man’s shoulders. Beneath him, Anakin groaned, turning his head to the opposite side. 

“Did you really have to wake me up?”

“Yes. You fell asleep outside and if you don’t head back to the cave, you’ll probably get sunburnt.”

“I’m from Tatooine” the other man mumbled, “We don’t get sunburnt.”

Obi-Wan sighed, Anakin’s mood had not changed at all from the previous night.    
“I’ll leave your breakfast here. I’m going off to explore some of the caves.”

“Sure. Whatever.” 

He walked for a while, taking in the barren landscape that had become familiar to him. The mission itself was set to last three weeks; the council figured that it would be enough time to survey the moon and if needed, draft a treaty with the natives. Obi-Wan was glad that they were the only ones on the moon. He needed a break from the political jaron. Obi-Wan figured that when they did not return to Coruscant on time, the council would send a squadron to find them. At least he hoped they would. 

Nearing a set of caves, he ducked inside. He wasn’t sure if the caves were all connected to one another, but he figured that with the right tools and planning, they could be. It would work as a brilliant base. To any ship passing above, it would look like another lifeless moon. The Republic could set up an infirmary, weapon storage, and probably a good control room all within the cave system. The council should be pleased with the discovery. 

When he could no longer see the entrance of the cave, Obi-Wan decided to take a break. Using his saber as a light source, he sat down on the dusty floor. Since landing on the moon, he found very little time to meditate. He felt his blood running hotter, more violent lately. If he planned to be stuck on this moon with Anakin and not kill him, he needed to regain a grip over himself. 

Taking a deep breath, he attempted to relax his mind and body. He imagined himself floating in a river. With every breath he took, the water around him would become calmer. Waves would flatten, currents would slow, and as he sank deeper into his meditation, the murky water cleared. He felt the force flowing beneath him, completely surrounding his being. He dipped his head back, trusting himself to the will of the force. 

And the force had decided to bring him back to a specific memory. 

_ “She’s quite beautiful” said Qui-Gon, putting a hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder, “Just remember not to stare.” _

_ Obi-Wan blushed brightly, his eyes immediately darting to the floor.  _

_ “I wasn’t staring Master, I was...um...making sure the room was safe.” _

_ “Mission accomplished then, my padawan. She looks perfectly secure.” _

_ “I’m going to check the perimeter again. I don’t trust the guards.” he said quickly, the blush still evident on his cheeks.  _

_ The older man gave a knowing smile, a playful twinkle in his eyes. Truthfully, he found the entire situation to be quite comical. He watched as his padawan pined for the duchess, always staring just a little too long when he thought that no one was looking. Qui-Gon always made sure to walk a few paces behind as Obi-Wan accompanied Satine back to her quarters. He quickly noticed how she would hang onto his arm just a little tighter. They both thought that they were sly in their emotions when in reality, they couldn’t have been louder.  _

_ “Obi-Wan” called Qui-Gon, stopping his padawan from leaving the room, “The code forbids attachment, not love.” _

_ “Master, I-” _

_ Qui-Gon waved him off.  _

_ “There’s no need for an explanation. I just wanted to remind you.” _

_ Obi-Wan gave a quick smile before turning on his heel and heading towards Satine.  _

Opening his eyes, he realized that he was in the cave and not on Mandalore. A deep ache settled in his chest. For a brief moment, he believed that he had them back. He could feel Satine’s hand in his own, dainty and soft compared to his large and rough ones. He heard Qui-Gon’s laugh and felt the power that it had to fill an entire room. Obi-Wan cursed the force for bringing him back to those memories. They were too painful now. 

Exiting the cave, he realized that the sun was already beginning to set. He must have been in the cave for far longer than he originally thought. The rumbling in his stomach confirmed this. As he reached the campsite, he saw the flames of the fire illuminating their cave. Anakin was probably cooking dinner by now. 

“Here, I made dinner.” Anakin said, handing him a bowl of what looked like soup. 

“Thank you.” 

The pair ate in relative silence.

“Any luck in repairing the transmitter?”

“Nope.”

“How was cave exploring?”

“Good.”

Both men were far too stubborn to apologize to the other. Obi-Wan just hoped that this argument would blow over, just as the hundreds of ones before them did. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt bad for waiting so long to update so I cranked this one out. The next chapter should be up soon!! <3


	4. The Past Never Leaves

Anakin groaned in frustration, breaking Obi-Wan’s concentration. Opening his eyes, he watched as the other Jedi kicked his pile of spare parts. After yelling out a few curses, Anakin removed his saber from his belt and slashed it directly into the frame of their wrecked ship. 

“Was that really necessary Anakin?”

“ _ Was that really necessary Anakin? _ ” mocked Anakin in an exaggerated Coruscanti accent, “I don’t see  _ you _ doing anything to get us off this rock any quicker.”

“The council will notice our absence and send someone to rescue us. We’ve only been here for a week when we were scheduled for three.”

“And if they don’t send anyone?”

“Well,” Obi-Wan replied, closing his eyes in the hopes of returning to his meditation, “We’ll just die on the moon.”

His attempts at meditation were futile. Anakin kept grumbling, letting out the occasional hiss when two wires sparked just a little too much. But beyond that, he was a ball of anxious energy in the force. The energy surrounding him was red and fiery, surging around him like a dangerous storm. It made Obi-Wan want to crawl out of his skin, just being near his padawan. 

“Want to spar?” Obi-Wan asked, knowing that it was the only way he was going to get Anakin to calm down. 

Anakin shot him a crazed smile and unclipped his saber. 

After they finished, the pair were a sweaty mess. They both sported a few pieces of singed clothing from where their opponent’s saber got a little too close. The air around them felt calmer, the threat subdued. Obi-Wan breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Obi-Wan-”

“Anakin-”

“You first,” replied Obi-Wan. 

“I wanted to apologize for last night. I shouldn’t have snapped.”

“Anakin, you have nothing to apologize for. I acted childishly, and for that, I’m sorry.”

“So we’re even?” Anakin said, a slight chuckle in his voice. 

“Considering that we both got in a few good strikes before, I would say so.”

Obi-Wan started the fire as Anakin grabbed two ration packs. Tonight was going to be another soup night, but lucky for them, these packets included bread. After eating food that was bland and tasteless for the past week, bread felt like a luxury. 

“How do you think Ahsoka is handling us being gone?” Anakin asked, shoveling soup into his mouth. 

“If she’s anything like you, she’s probably snuck out of the temple a dozen times by now.”

“Hey! I only snuck out a few times.”

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow at his padawan, sending him a pointed look. 

“Okay...maybe more than a few times.”

Obi-Wan laughed, remembering the days when Anakin would try to slink silently through their shared apartment. He was never completely successful, always bumping into a table or closing his door just a bit too loudly. Recon and stealth were never his strongpoints. 

“I do believe Ahsoka is doing just fine,” Obi-Wan said, “She’s exceptionally bright.”

“You think so?”

“She reminds me so much of you when you were a padawan.”

“I worry that I’m not enough for her. She can be so...so…”

“Difficult?” Obi-Wan finished for him, a smile on his face. 

“Yea, that sounds about right.” 

“You’re the best master that she could have asked for.”

“I learned from the best.”

Obi-Wan cringed internally. He wanted to correct Anakin, to tell him that Qui-Gon, or Master Windu, or _ kriff, _ a feral bantha, would have been a better master than him. Instead, he muttered a weak “thank you” in response, not wanting to ruin the moment. 

The two men continued to share stories of the past well into the night until the pair drifted off to sleep.

Obi-Wan opened his eyes and found himself tied to a chair. The room around him was dark, the smell of musk suffocating him. His throat felt raw and he tasted the remnants of blood in his mouth. 

“Look at you,” a voice hissed from the darkness, “A shell of the man I once knew”. It sounded familiar, but he could not place who it belonged to. “I trusted you to protect me and look at where it has left me.”

A figure emerged from the darkness. She was clothed in a white dress, the large red stain was painted on the front. Her skin had a blue-tint, purple veins jutting out from beneath her skin. Her eyes were stark white, empty. Obi-Wan sharply inhaled. 

_ Satine. _

“If he was strong enough, we would both be alive”, a second voice said from the depths of the shadows. Obi-Wan felt the room dip in temperature, a horrific chill settling in his bones. He shook violently in his chair. Qui-Gon emerged from the shadows, his entire being radiating icy disappointment. His eyes were dead and empty as well. It pained Obi-Wan to look at him. The eyes that once held so much mirth, so much wisdom, were reduced to haunted orbs. 

The pair circled Obi-Wan, who was too shocked to speak. He kept opening and closing his mouth, but no sound ever came. 

“You stood helplessly as Maul plunged the blade into me” sneered Satine as she dragged her long nails across his chest. “My life would have been so much longer had I never been cursed to meet you.”

She bent down, her cold lips pressing lightly on the shell of his ear. 

_ “And to think I fell in love with a man as pathetic as you”.  _

Qui-Gon walked in front of Obi-Wan, his form towering over him. He eyed Obi-Wan, his face dripping with discontent. 

“I thought I raised you better” he spat, “Allowing yourself to wallow in pity. Absolutely disgusting.”

Qui-Gon's hand grabbed a fistful of his hair, right where his padawan braid used to lie. 

_ “I should have left you on Bandomeer. You’re no Jedi.” _

Obi-Wan wanted to scream, to cry, to get on his knees and beg for forgiveness. But his body failed to move. The two people he missed and loved so terribly were so close, and yet, he was not strong enough to break free of his restraints. His skin itched at the need to touch them, to feel them again. 

“You never listened. Never gave me a chance” a third voice sounded, resentment threading its way through the words. In front of him stood Anakin, except this Anakin exuded hatred and evil. His eyes glowed an unsettling yellow. 

_ “This is your fault.” _

He felt the world around him crashing, every wall crumbling. Bile rose in his throat, burning him.  _ No, not Anakin. Please not Anakin too. _ He opened his mouth and the scream of a broken man erupted from his throat. 

Obi-Wan felt a pair of hands shaking him awake. He opened his eyes to see Anakin, his blue eyes staring at him with furrowed brows. 

“Master, are you-”

Obi-Wan stared at the floor in shock. Everything in the dream felt so real, so palpable. He could practically smell Satine’s perfume lingering in the air. He could feel Qui-Gon’s cold gaze on his form. They were gone. They were gone and  _ it was all his fault _ . 

Panic began to bubble beneath his veins. He felt it rioting beneath the surface.  _ They were right _ , the voice in his head whispered,  _ You failed _ .  _ You could have saved them.  _

Anakin put a hand on his shoulder. 

“Obi-Wan, I need you to look at me.”

With what little strength he had, Obi-Wan picked his head up. He looked at Anakin as two hot tears leaked out of the corner of his eyes. His breath became quicker, coming out in short bursts. The cave suddenly felt too small, too claustrophobic. His robes were too hot, his skin too tight. 

He wasn’t sure when, but he felt himself getting pulled into a hug from Anakin. For a moment, he forgot about the Jedi and the war and the fact they were stranded on a deserted moon. Obi-Wan needed to feel his padawan, to make sure that he was real. The images of Satine, Qui-Gon, and Anakin played in a menacing loop behind his eyes. Obi-Wan knew that they weren’t real, but he needed to make sure. He squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to rid himself of the thoughts. 

Obi-Wan buried himself deeper in Anakin’s chest, not caring that tears were wetting his padawan’s shirt. Hearing Anakin’s heartbeat was grounding him. Anakin rubbed his master’s back lightly, his touch warm but unsure. 

After what felt like hours, Obi-Wan pulled away from him. 

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me and-”

“Obi-Wan, don’t apologize.”

Obi-Wan opened his mouth to argue but quickly shut it. He was in no mood for another fight. Exhaustion had already begun to take over him. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“Can it wait until morning?” 

Anakin let out a yawn and nodded. Obi-Wan settled back down into his sleeping bag and watched as Anakin brought his over from the other side of the cave. He cocked an eyebrow at his former padawan. 

“When I used to have nightmares, I always found it easier to sleep when you stayed close to me. Thought I’d return the favor.” 

Obi-Wan closed his eyes. 

“Thank you, Anakin. _ ” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure, I needed to write something semi-fluffy and this was the result. The boys are getting closer!!


	5. First Confessions

Judging by the light coming into the cave, Obi-Wan assumed that he had slept well into the afternoon. His throat felt scratchy from crying and more than anything, he longed for a shower. He would do unspeakable things to be able to stand under a hot stream of water. 

“Look who’s awake,” Anakin said, tossing him a protein bar from their stash, “You sleep okay?”

“As good as one can on the floor.” 

He’d never tell Anakin, but it was the best he'd slept in weeks. Though Anakin was an arm's length away, Obi-Wan could feel the warm energy radiating from his body. It felt safe. It felt like  _ home _ . 

“If you’re feeling up to it, I figured we could explore more of the caves today?”

“I’ll grab my saber.” 

The pair walked in silence to a set of caves a few miles east of their camp. Anakin tried to make awkward small talk, bringing up anything from the weather (which hadn’t changed the entire time they were there) to what they were going to eat for dinner (the only options they realistically had were soup or soup with bread). Obi-Wan knew that he was trying to find a way to bring up the previous night, but neither of them could find a good way to address it. As much as Obi-Wan secretly hoped that his padawan would drop the ordeal, he felt as if he owed Anakin a proper explanation.

The mouth of the cave was a pear shape. It was narrow, but still large enough that the two men could walk side-by-side. Like the majority of the caves that they explored, this one was straight-forward with very few twists or turns. Dusty, dry, and dark. 

“I didn’t know Satine very well” Anakin began, his hand fidgeting with his lightsaber, “But she seemed like an amazing woman”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Obi-Wan said, a sad smile on his face, “She was stubborn, yet open-minded. Fierce, but gentle. And between you and I, she could drink every galactic senator under the table.”

“Really?”

“I once watched her down three shots of Kri’gee without flinching.”

Anakin laughed, imagining a younger version of his master gobsmacked as Satine downed some of the hardest liquor in the galaxy.

“You miss her, don’t you?”

“Every day.”

“Last night” Obi-Wan began, taking in a deep breath, “I saw her and Qui-Gon. In the dream, they seemed so real. It felt like I could just reach out and touch them. They kept yelling at me, telling me how disappointed they were.”

“Why were they disappointed?” asked Anakin.

“I failed them.” He felt his throat beginning to close again. He gripped his saber incredibly tight, willing the tears in his eyes to fade. “I couldn’t save either of them.”

“We can’t save everyone, Master. You’ve said it a thousand times.”

“But  _ I _ should have been able to.”

“So you’re telling me that you are supposed to save every single lifeform you come across?”

“No. Just the people I love.” 

He tried to steady his breathing and ignore the single tear that was running down his cheek. He felt like a broken detonator, doomed to explode at any minute. If he wasn’t careful, everything would rise to the surface at once. Obi-Wan knew that he couldn’t handle that, not without having any alcohol on the moon. 

“For what it’s worth” Anakin said, “I have always been proud to call you my Master.”

“Anakin, now is not the time to lie in order to spare my feelings.”

“I’m not lying!” Anakin snapped defensively, “I used to brag to the other padawan’s all the time!”

“ _ My master could totally beat your master _ ” he said, his voice raising a few octaves to mimic a child’s voice, “ _ My master could probably beat Master Yoda in a duel _ .”

“We both know that I couldn’t beat Master Yoda.”

“Jedi Knight me knows that. But padawan me thought that you were unstoppable.”

Obi-Wan felt very choked up again. 

“Look at me now, crying to my former padawan in a dirty cave.”

Anakin stopped, looking at his master dead in the eyes. 

“You’re still the strongest man I know.”

Obi-Wan put a hand on Anakin’s shoulder. He desperately wanted to pull him into a hug, to thank him for everything in the past day. But he just couldn’t. Instead, he squeezed his shoulder tightly, hoping that Anakin would understand. 

The pair walked for a few more miles, noticing nothing out of the ordinary in the caves. A few openings confirmed their predictions that all the caves were connected in some way. They most likely led to some centralized opening deep within the planet. But seeing their lack of resources and technology, they figured that they’d let the council explore the vast labyrinth on their own. The last thing either of them needed was to get lost underground. Once they both heard their stomachs rumbling, they decided to head back to camp. 

“Tell me more about Satine.” Anakin said, the blue light of the saber casting shadows on his face. 

“Care to know about the time I got caught sneaking out of her room by Qui-Gon?”

A grin erupted on Anakin’s face. 

“A story where  _ Master Kenobi _ breaks the rules? I’m in.” 

Dinner that night was another helping of plain soup. They decided to skip the bread part, figuring that they needed to ration their food just in case. Obi-Wan decided that for their next mission, he was sneaking some seasonings into their supplies container. 

By now, Obi-Wan thought that he’d be crushed by the sheer embarrassment of opening up to Anakin. He was supposed to be the rock, not the other way around. But that was the thing about Anakin. He had a funny way of making everyone who knew him feel special. He had a lot of love to give to the universe. A fact that always terrified Obi-Wan. 

“You know,” Obi-Wan said, setting his bowl down next to him, “I’m always so strict with you seeing Padme because I’m scared of you turning out like me.” 

“What do you mean?”

“I know what it was like to fall in love with a politician. I don’t want to see you heartbroken.”

Anakin stilled, his head cocking to one side. 

“Padme and I aren’t together.”

“Anakin, I just confessed to you my decade long love affair. I think we can both stop pretending.”

“Seriously, we aren’t together,” he said, setting his bowl down as well. “We’re just really good friends.”

“I told Qui-Gon that Satine and I were  _ really good friends _ until he saw his making out on a balcony.”

“We really aren’t together.”

“So how do you explain the business after Geonosis? The pair of you were practically attached to one another.” 

Anakin laughed, the tone in his voice telling Obi-Wan that he fondly remembered the times. 

“I’ll admit, we tried to date but things just didn’t work out between us.”

“Oh,” Obi-Wan said, his pale blue eyes widening, “I had no idea. I apologize for even bringing it up.” 

“It’s okay. It was a mutual ending.”

“May I ask why?”

Anakin gave a nervous giggle, clenching and unclenching his fists. 

“Let’s just say that we...um...realized that we were both attracted to very different kinds of people.”

Obi-Wan looked at him and nodded slowly, confusion still evident on his face. 

“She...um...likes the more feminine type. And I, well...I like the more...well, masculine type” he stuttered out, not quite knowing how to word it. “Padme and I just really like to hang out with each other. Which is why we’re normally always together.”

Realization flashed across Obi-Wan’s face, his jaw plopping slightly open. He had always thought that he was a very observant person and was shocked to realize that Anakin had hidden this for so long. Obi-Wan saw an attractive young Jedi and a beautiful senator and just assumed they were in love. 

“I hope this doesn’t change anything between us,” Anakin said, his eyes not moving from the ground, “I know it’ll probably be weird with us on missions and training all the time and being so close in the cave and-.” 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan cut him off, meeting his padawan’s gaze, “This doesn’t change a thing.”

“You’re not bothered by it at all?”

Obi-Wan gave a laugh, the first genuine one that he can remember having in a while. 

“Once we’re back at the temple, ask Vos about the times that we used to sneak out.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“I don’t kiss and tell. But Vos sure does.”

“I can’t believe this” Anakin laughed, “You and  _ Vos _ ? Of all people?”

“Opposites attract, what can I say.”

Anakin shook his head, disbelief still written across his face. 

“I should have told you sooner. I was just so afraid of telling you and having things change between us.”

“Trust me Anakin, I’m not going anywhere.”

As the light faded outside, the cave became increasingly dark. The fire proved to be a better heating source than a light source. Obi-Wan gave a yawn, both physically and emotionally exhausted. He felt lighter, feeling like he shedded layers and layers of skin. The air between him and Anakin still held onto the ghost of their laughter, giving the space a serene feel. It was the happiest that he’d felt in months. 

Crawling into his sleeping bag, he was glad to see that Anakin had not moved his from the previous night. He stared up at the roof of the cave, feeling the light of the fire grow dim. 

“Master,” Anakin said from his sleeping back, his voice only a little louder than a whisper, “We should do this more often.” 

“For once, I couldn’t agree more.” 


	6. Moving On Isn't Letting Go

Obi-Wan had begun to spend most of his days meditating. Between him and Anakin, they had explored most of the caves within walking distance, leaving them with very little left to do. Anakin busied himself with creating little droids and trinkets out of the wreckage, giving up on the idea of creating a working transmitter. His latest project involved trying to make a miniature R2. 

“I think R2 would like a little brother,” Anakin said, trying to find a piece that could act as wheels. “He needs other friends besides C3PO.”

“It’s a droid, Anakin.”

“ _ He’s _ my friend and  _ he’s _ saved your skin more times than we both can count.” 

Obi-Wan gave a laugh. Anakin’s attachment to droids is one of the few things that hasn’t changed in the many years they’ve known each other. 

“Next time I see  _ him _ , I promise to give my most sincere thanks.”

“Thank you. He’d appreciate that.” 

Anakin turned back to his parts, bending sheets of metal from the ship into rounded shapes. He was silent, besides the occasional grunt or hiss when something didn’t fit quite right. 

Obi-Wan walked towards his favorite meditation spot. It was a collection of rocks a few feet from the camp. The tops of the rocks were all flat, corroded away by long-forgotten winds. The elevation from the ground paired with the warmth of the sun made it the ideal spot. It made it easy for the Jedi to slip away and connect himself with the force. 

Sitting cross-legged, he inhaled deeply, smelling the dry heat of the planet. He felt his breath course through his body, imagining it intertwining itself with his blood. With each breath, he felt lighter, as if he was floating. Obi-Wan let himself be bathed in the force, becoming engulfed in it completely. 

Today, the force decided to bring him back into another memory. 

_ He was much younger, his padawan braid hanging loosely over his shoulder. Qui-Gon was next to him, his eyes slightly wrinkled but still full of light. The pair walked barefoot around the temple gardens. It was a ritual that they did after every mission. Qui-Gon swore that walking without shoes was one of the best ways to feel the living force. He said that after missions, it was the perfect way to cleanse the body.  _

_ “Obi-Wan” Qui-Gon began, his voice soft but clear, “I am beginning to fear that I have very little left to teach you.”  _

_ “That’s not true at all, Master. There’s still so much about the force that I need to learn.” _

_ “What you do not know, the force itself will teach you.” _

_ “I want to learn it from you,” Obi-Wan replied, feeling his chest become tighter. He tried to reel in his emotions, clenching his fists into tight balls.  _

_ “You act as if you can’t learn from me if I am no longer your Master. I learn from you and other Jedi every day.”  _

_ “It’s not the same.” _

_ “Oh, but it is.” Qui-Gon replied, “The force is the best teacher and master that we have.” _

_ “I don’t want another Master,” Obi-Wan said quietly, his eyes fixed on the floor. He knew that this day would come eventually, but he never felt as if he would be ready.  _

_ “Moving on does not mean that you have to let go, my padawan.”  _

_ “Do you mean that?” _

_ Qui-Gon stilled turning to meet his padawan’s eyes.  _

_ “You have grown into an exceptional man, Obi-Wan. When the time comes, you will be an even better Jedi.”  _

Obi-Wan opened his eyes, adjusting to the brightness of the planet. He exhaled shakily, trying to re-ground himself. The memory itself was bittersweet, pairing the raw wound that was Qui-Gon with the soothing echo of his praise. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to relive it again, but he knew that the emptiness in his chest would not be going away anytime soon. 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan called, walking over to the crash site, “In the mood for a duel?”

“Seeing that I can’t get this inner motor to work, I’d love to.”

Sparing with Anakin always brought him a sense of peace. It allowed him to release his emotions in a way that sometimes felt more cathartic than meditation. Across him stood Anakin, a glowing presence in the force. His golden skin shone lightly in the sun, his dirty blonde hair hanging in loose waves. Obi-Wan took notice of his frame, exuding strength and agility. He understood why Anakin was often used as the poster boy for the war. 

As always, Anakin swung first. 

Their blades collided in a fury of blue sparks. With a grunt, Obi-Wan pushed Anakin back, watching as he skidded back a few feet. His ex-padawan grinned, running at him with full speed. Before reaching him, Anakin flipped over his master, landing on the opposite side. Obi-Wan spun around, meeting Anakin’s blade with his own. He moved to swing down but was blocked again. They leaped apart. 

The pair circled each other, waiting for the other to strike. 

“Was the flip really necessary, Anakin?” Obi-Wan said with a grin, “It feels like you’re showing off.”

“Sounds like someone is jealous of my skills.”

“Remember who taught you those skills,  _ young one _ .” 

“Maybe I need a reminder.”

Anakin bounded towards him again, his saber outstretched in front of him. He moved to make another leap, but mid-jump, Obi-Wan grabbed him by the ankle. He pulled him down to the ground, using the force to ensure that the landing wouldn’t be too rough for his padawan. Anakin fell to the ground with a soft _ thud.  _

“That’s not fair!” Anakin whined, brushing the dust off his pants. “You can’t just tackle me like that.”

“That’s the lesson my dear padawan, the enemy never plays fair.”

“You’re not my enemy.” 

“Then how about this for the lesson,” Obi-Wan replied, extending his hand to help Anakin up, “Never underestimate your Master.”

“Fair enough.”

The sky was beginning to darken and the pair headed back inside the cave. Dinner was just a ration bar, as they wanted to preserve food in the instance that the council did not come to their aid as quickly as they thought. They both craved real food, but luckily enough, the ration bars did satisfy their hunger. 

As the night crept on, they chatted lightly. The conversation between them included predicting what the clones would do after the war. Anakin knew that Rex would continue serving the military in some form. He knew that he could not be away from the action for too long. Obi-Wan hoped that Cody would settle down with a nice lady, move to some scenic planet. But he knew his commander too well. He just hoped that Cody would work in a much less violent sector of the military, maybe logistics. Even the clones were growing weary of the war. Obi-Wan believed that no one, not even those genetically engineered for war, should have to withstand the number of battles that they have.

The two men tucked in for the night. 

Obi-Wan laid restlessly in his sleeping bag. He stared at the ceiling of the cave for what felt like hours, counting each crack he could find. Obi-Wan decided to quit the game after he counted the 235th crack. Sleep was not coming easily to him. The memory of Qui-Gon was weighing heavily on his mind. He felt an overwhelming sense of loss, of loneliness. His relationship with his former master may not have been perfect, but Obi-Wan never doubted for a second that he was cared for. 

Heaving a sigh, Obi-Wan turned to look at Anakin. He was fast asleep, his chest rising and falling with each breath. His hand was stretched outside his sleeping bag, inches away from Obi-Wan’s own hand. 

Without thinking, he reached out and lightly laid his own hand on top of Anakin’s. The action felt almost like a reflex. The warmth coming from his body felt grounding, giving him a sense of wholeness. It felt right. Across from him, Anakin stirred lightly. Obi-Wan’s entire frame froze, his breath lodging itself in his throat. His mind buzzed, trying to come up with every excuse. 

_ I was asleep and didn’t realize, sorry. I thought I saw a bug on your hand and was trying to swat it away. Uh, the wind moved my hand.  _

Anakin didn’t say a word. Instead, he moved to interlock their fingers. Obi-Wan was practically shaking, his anxiety surging. He wasn’t sure if Anakin was awake or not, and his mind was too wired to decipher the implications of either option. But a gentle squeeze from Anakin brought him back. Looking over, Anakin still looked to be asleep, though there was a ghost of a smile on his lips. Obi-Wan decided that it didn’t matter. He returned the squeeze, finally allowing himself to close his eyes. 

When he awoke the next morning, his arm and hand were numb. But something in his chest stirred with life. 

The next few days passed much like the others. Anakin would fiddle with parts with Obi-Wan deciding to sit and watch him work for a few days. He would half-listen to him rant about how the circuit boards were actually the most important part of any machine and how anyone who said differently was stupid. Obi-Wan tried to understand, but mechanics were a foreign language to him. It was just nice to see Anakin passionate over something that was not war. 

They would occupy themselves during the day and at night, one of them would pretend not to notice the other grab their hand. The men never talked about it and yet, it had become an expected part of their nightly routine. 

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin said, his voice barely above a whisper, “You can come closer if you want.”

The older man stilled, not knowing exactly what Anakin meant. He inhaled, shuffling himself and his sleeping bag slightly over. Their hands were practically on top of each other. The air around them buzzed, the sound of their own nervous breathing filling the cave. They were both so unsure, so afraid to mess up. 

“You can move closer too, Anakin” Obi-Wan replied, so lightly that he wasn’t entirely sure if Anakin could hear him. His throat felt dry and thick. 

It took Anakin a few minutes to react. 

The younger man moved so his head fell into the crook of Obi-Wan’s neck. His breath coming out in short puffs, tickling the skin there. He lightly rested his hand on his master’s chest. There was a tension resting between them, still unsure until Obi-Wan moved. He slowly wrapped his arm around Anakin’s body, his hand resting in the center of his back. With his free hand, he moved to interlock his fingers with the ones on his chest. 

“Is this okay?” he breathed, feeling the most relaxed and nervous that he’s ever been in his entire life. Anakin nodded against his neck, squeezing his hand tightly. 

Obi-Wan bent his head down, resting his chin onto Anakin's soft curls. The pair quickly fell asleep, faster than either of them had in a very long time. 

They both felt more at home there, in a lonely cave on a deserted moon than anywhere else. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It kills me to say that the boys may not be this happy for long....thanks so much for reading so far!! The next chapter should be up within the next few days!


	7. Prone to Explosions

If Obi-Wan’s estimates were correct, he and Anakin had been on the moon for close to two and a half weeks now. Time had moved both incredibly fast and inexplicably slow during their time there. In some ways, it felt as if they had spent an entire lifetime on the rock. But right now, Obi-Wan wanted nothing more than to freeze time completely. 

Anakin was curled into his chest, his sandy curls tucked underneath Obi-Wan’s chin. His arm laid loosely around the older Jedi’s waist, creating a warm and comforting weight. Obi-Wan could feel every inhale that he took, smiling at the very light snores that came out of Anakin’s mouth. In this moment, Anakin looked so fragile, so golden. He tightened his grip on the younger man, pulling him even closer to his chest. Obi-Wan knew that it was impossible to shield Anakin from the war, especially with how prone to explosions he was. But as he lay in his arms, Obi-Wan swore that he could protect him from anything in the galaxy. Beneath him, Anakin stirred lightly, starting to wake-up.    
“Don’t wanna move,” Anakin mumbled, his voice partially muffled by Obi-Wan’s chest. 

“No one said that you had to move.”

“But the sun’s up.”

“It's not like we have anywhere to be.”

Anakin snuggled deeper into Obi-Wan’s chest, muttering something that resembled “you’re right”. Obi-Wan chuckled, resisting the urge to kiss the top of Anakin’s head. Even though he had Anakin had fallen asleep tangled in each other’s arms for more than a few days now, he felt as if the act was too intimate. As Anakin fell back asleep beneath him, Obi-Wan found himself drifting back to sleep as well. 

When they both finally awoke, it was nearly afternoon. If they were back at the temple, neither of them would have dreamed about sleeping past breakfast. Well, at the very least Obi-Wan couldn’t. Anakin had earned himself extra laps during training due to his affinity to sleeping through alarms more than once. Either way, the change of pace was much needed for both of them. 

Not in the mood for sparing or exploring, the pair lounged on the top of a collection of rocks. Obi-Wan sprawled out, using his robes as a pillow. Anakin opted to use his master’s lap as a pillow instead. 

“Were me and Padme that obvious?” asked Anakin, curiosity evident in his voice. 

“Considering that every news outlet on the Holonet was writing about you two, I’d say that you were very obvious.” 

“We both know that the Holonet will use anything as a story, so I hardly think that’s fair.”

“Anakin, every member of the Jedi Order and Galactic Senate saw you grab her ass after her speech.” 

“That easily could have been covered up as a slip of my hand.”

“A very deliberate and pointed slip of your hand.”

Anakin laughed, his voice slightly echoing off of the rocks around him. It was music to Obi-Wan. 

“Were you and Satine as much of a scandal as we were?”

“Thankfully no,” Obi-Wan replied, “I’m not one for the spotlight as it is.”

“I could only imagine the headlines: Handsome Jedi and Beautiful Duchess Caught Together In Private Cave.”

Obi-Wan froze. 

“You think I’m handsome?”

“Anyone with eyes would think that” Anakin laughed. 

The older Jedi remained silent, his mind whirling. Back in his youth, Obi-Wan knew that he wasn’t bad looking. But now, with wrinkles forming on the corners of his eyes and pieces of gray becoming more prominent in his hair, he felt as if he hardly met that definition. 

“I-Thank you Anakin” he stuttered, a slight blush forming on his cheeks. 

“Don’t get me wrong,  _ I am _ the more handsome Jedi here.” 

“Oh shut it,” Obi-Wan laughed, swatting him lightly on the head, “You are completely insufferable sometimes.”

“You’d be lost without me.”

“I, unfortunately, can’t argue with you there.” 

As the days stretched on, the Jedi treated the moon much like a resort. They slept in late, sunbathed on the rocks, and in the evenings, enjoyed what resembled a sunset. The planet’s normally yellow sky became clouded with dark blues and greens until eventually fading into black. 

Tonight’s sunset was no different. The sky was a pale yellow, clouds of cyan and mint beginning to spread. As Anakin laid his head on Obi-Wan’s shoulder, he quickly decided that it was the most perfect sunset he had ever seen. Anakin interlocked their fingers, his thumb rubbing small circles into his master’s hand. 

“What if we just stayed here forever?” Anakin asked softly. 

“If there wasn’t a war and thousands of lives at stake, I don’t think that I would mind.”

“And if there wasn’t a war?”

“I’d much rather a planet with water,” Obi-Wan said with a slight laugh, “But yes, I would stay here with you.”

Anakin hummed in agreeance. 

As the sky grew darker, all Obi-Wan wanted was to pull Anakin even closer. Their bodies had turned into magnets, calling out to their opposite sides. He wrapped his arm around the younger man’s waist, feeling the strong muscle underneath his robes. 

Anakin lifted his head from his master’s shoulder, turning to look down at the older man. Obi-Wan met his gaze, his breath quickening. Anakin moved his hand to cup his cheek, feeling the roughness of Obi-Wan’s beard. He closed his eyes, leaning his face closer. 

Their lips touched in a whisper of a kiss. 

Around them, the force bubbled and popped. It surged between them, filling them with more emotion than either had ever felt in their lifetime. It was suffocating. Obi-Wan was drowning in Anakin and he never wanted to breathe again. 

As quickly as it happened, Obi-Wan pulled away. He stared at Anakin, blue eyes wide and panicked. His entire body was trembling as if he had just taken a thousand blaster shots. 

_ This can't be happening  _ was the only thought that replayed through his mind. 

“Anakin...I...I shouldn’t have done that.”

“What do you mean  _ you shouldn't have done that? _ ” Anakin said, confusion and hurt painting his words.

“We can’t be doing this.”

“Give me one reason why we can’t.”

“We just can’t be doing this.”

Anakin gave a hollow laugh, jabbing a finger into the older man’s chest. “Here we go again. You are avoiding the problem at hand.” 

“I’m not avoiding anything. I’m telling you that we can’t do this.” 

“You’re avoiding telling me  _ why _ .”

“You should know why,” Obi-Wan said, switching to the tone of voice he used when chastising younglings. “It can’t work out.” 

“Well, you should have thought about that two weeks ago when  _ you _ started this.” 

“I didn’t think that it would lead to this.”

“Are you kidding me?” Anakin roared, his force signature beginning to drip with hatred, “We cuddled for two weeks straight, barely leaving each others’ sides, and you didn’t think that it would lead to this _? _ ”

“Sleeping next to each other improved both of our sleeping patterns. It was a survival tactic.”

“So that’s what I am to you,” Anakin said, his voice dropping dangerously low, “It’s nice to know how you finally feel,  _ Master Kenobi _ .” 

“That’s not what I meant...I-”

“I’ve heard enough,” Anakin said, cutting him off sharply, “Let’s just hope the council comes soon. I can’t stand to even look at you.” 

The younger man sulked back to the cave, never turning to look back at his master. Obi-Wan was rooted to the spot, staring blankly into the surrounding darkness. From inside the cave, he heard Anakin’s saber ignite, followed by a series of grunts and curses. He knew that his ex-padawan was currently imagining his face in place of the rocks. 

He knew that he deserved it. He should have never allowed it to go this far. Anakin deserved someone younger, someone, better. The man could have anyone in the galaxy at the snap of his fingers. Anakin possessed such a ferocity that caused even the most heartless of people to fall. Obi-Wan guessed that was why he was in the situation that he was in now. 

Anakin’s noises from the cave slowly died down, the mouth of the cave stopped spitting blue sparks. For a second, he contemplated returning to the cave. But he knew that if he did, he wouldn’t be strong enough to refuse to give Anakin what he thought he wanted. Everyone, including Master Yoda, always said that Anakin was his fatal flaw. 

Now, sitting on the dusty ground, sobs racking through his body, he was starting to believe them. 

The pair did not speak a word to each other. They communicated solely through gestures. If Anakin needed Obi-Wan to start the fire, he’d just point. When Obi-Wan would go for a walk, he’d just gesture to the mouth of the cave. They could barely look at each other, let alone talk. Every time he laid his eyes on Anakin for more than a few seconds, he wanted nothing more than to crawl out of his skin. Just being in the cave was more than upsetting. The sight of Anakin’s sleeping bag so far away from his was enough to make it impossible to breathe. 

Nights were the worst. He was too afraid to fall asleep, terrified at the chance of his nightmares returning. This time, he knew that he had no one to turn to. No curly-haired man to squeeze when the sadness threatened to swallow him whole. He barely had his memories, as recalling them dug a knife deep into his heart. Obi-Wan guessed that he got five hours, at most, over the last few days. 

He saw the sun starting to rise at the mouth of the cave, alerting him that morning had come. Another night of complete restlessness. He was just about to start the fire for breakfast when he heard it. 

An engine. 

“Anakin” he called, his voice rough from not using it, “There’s a ship.”

Silently, Anakin crawled out of his sleeping bag and grabbed his lightsaber. Creeping to the mouth of the cave, they tried to get a view of the incoming spacecraft. As it approached the planet, they quickly realized that it was a Republic ship. The council had sent a rescue crew. 

Exiting the cave, the Jedi ignited their sabers, looking to signal their location to their rescuers. Above them, they watched as a ship circled back and started to descend near them. After what felt like ages, the ship landed, a cloud of dust rising from the ground. 

“Isn’t the master supposed to rescue the padawan?” Ahsoka said, walking down the ramp of the ship. 

“Snips!” Anakin called, running over to his padawan and wrapping her in a loose hug, “I can’t begin to tell you how happy I am to see you.”

“You can tell me all about it after you’ve had a shower, Skyguy. You’re covered in dirt.”

“Try living on a dustball for three weeks.”

“I think I’ll pass,” Ahsoka said, a wide grin erupting on her face. “You boys coming?”

The two Jedi followed her onto the ship, both of them taking one last look at the moon. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all....I'm sorry. Next chapter will be up in a day as an apology <3 As always, thanks for reading!


	8. Return to The Temple

“Good to see ya, Generals” Rex called from the pilot’s seat, “Glad to see ya both in working order still.”

Obi-Wan suppressed a scoff at the comment. If he was being honest, every breath felt like a curse. But a Jedi’s life is a hard life. Which meant that happiness was always meant to be fleeting. At least that’s what he’s always told himself. 

“It’s good to see you too, Rex” Obi-Wan replied, taking a seat near the window, “Care to fill us in on what we missed?”

“Nothing too crazy, General. Lost a few, won a few. The war’s pretty much in the same spot as when you left it. The only interesting thing I’ve seen in the past few weeks is this rescue mission.”

“Things must be really boring if  _ this _ is the most exciting thing,” Anakin said from across the ship, eyeing his commander. 

“Well sir, the mission itself isn’t eventful. But the lead-up sure was.”

“The lead-up?”

“ _ Shut-up Rex _ ” Ahsoka cut in, shooting glares at him, “Nothing really happened, Masters. I promise.”

Anakin and Obi-Wan both raised their eyebrows at her. 

“Snips, you’re a terrible liar.”

“It wasn’t my fault! The council wouldn’t listen!” the togruta huffed, her montrals swinging slightly with her outburst, “I wanted to come look for you a week ago, but they wouldn’t let me! Master Obi-Wan always gives a two-week update, no matter what. It just felt wrong.”

“So what did you do?” Anakin asked. 

“...I may have staked out Master Koon’s room for the past 7 days until he let me take Rex and a ship.”

“You did what?!” Anakin laughed, his face erupting in a huge grin, “That’s the best thing I’ve heard in a while.”

“That’s not even the half of it,” Rex said, continuing to pilot, “She got the entire 501st and 212th to protest in order to start your rescue. It was quite impressive really.” 

“Both platoons?”

“In our defense, we were all bored” Rex replied with a grin, “The other Jedi don’t let us blow up Seppie ships like you do.”

“You both never cease to amaze me,” Anakin said, shaking his head slightly. 

“While I know Master Koon did not appreciate your actions, I very much did,” Obi-Wan said, shooting a smile to his grand-padawan, “Your trust in your feelings and the force is very admirable.”

“Thank you, Master,” Ahsoka said, her orange cheeks darkening slightly. “Besides, I couldn’t be without you both for too long. You’re the best people to annoy.” 

Obi-Wan was relieved that the rest of the ride was filled with Ahsoka catching them up. She filled them in on upcoming war plans, political updates, and of course, the latest temple gossip. While Obi-Wan would never admit it, he was quite invested in the Aayla and Bly scandal. He let her and Anakin drone on, happy to be able to space out for a few hours before landing. Force knew that he needed some time to clear his ever-jumbled mind. 

As they landed, he saw Master Windu waiting on the platform with crossed arms. The last thing he wanted was to recall the last three weeks. 

“I’ll do the debriefing,” Obi-Wan said to Anakin, “You should get some rest.”

“Works for me.” 

If this was any other mission, the pair would have bickered all the way to the council chambers on who would do the report. More times than not, they both wound up doing it together. This time, Obi-Wan knew that he would have to undertake it alone. 

“Master Kenobi, General Skywalker, welcome back,” Mace said, bowing slightly to the other Jedi, “I’m guessing that you had an interesting three weeks?”

“Interesting is one way to put it,” Anakin said, not being able to resist rolling his eyes. 

“The council expects a full report as soon as possible.”

“That can be arranged” Obi-Wan replied, “If you’d like to call the meeting, I can relay our findings now.”

“And Skywalker?”

“We know that Obi-Wan is the better storyteller here. He’ll take over this one.”

“Very well. Tomorrow morning you will report to the council to learn your next assignment.”

Anakin nodded, walking towards the temple. Obi-Wan watched his back and as he left, realized that this was the first time they’d be separated in close to a month. Everything felt heavy and he decided that he would blame it on hyperspace travel. 

“Good to see you, it is,” Yoda said as Obi-Wan entered the council chambers. Obi-Wan was welcomed by the familiar space. Bathed in natural light, the room always had a sense of warmth. A heartbeat surged through the walls, making it feel more human than inanimate. Though it was sparsely decorated, it still stood to be one of the most beautiful rooms Obi-Wan had ever stood in. 

“I hope you come bearing good news,” said Fisto, smiling at his fellow master, “It would be a shame if you spent a month on a moon that we couldn’t use.” 

Obi-Wan stood in the center of the room, the eyes of the council locked on him. Though he’s done this process hundreds of times, he always preferred to be on the other side. He often felt like a cheap attraction when standing in front of them all. 

“The moon will serve as an excellent base.”

“Any life forms?” Master Ti asked from her seat. 

“None that we could find any presence or evidence of. The force gave us no indications that there were others.” 

“And the climate?” another Master called out. 

“Dry and mild. In the three weeks we were there, the moon had no fluctuation in temperature or weather. There was a series of caves on the planet that could act as vital hide-outs.”

“Caves, there are?”

“Yes. From what we discovered, the caves seem to lead to a centralized point. We could not reach the center, due to our lack of resources.”

There was a hum of approval from the other masters. Obi-Wan could practically hear the cogs turning in their heads. They were probably drawing up blueprints as he spoke. 

“We are still investigating the attack on your ship” Master Windu replied, folding his hands in his lap, “We believe that a Separatist sympathizer may have seen your ship and tipped them off.”

“If it had not been for Anakin’s piloting, I’m afraid that we might not have made it.”

“Lucky, both of you are. With you, the force was.”

Obi-Wan just nodded, not being able to come up with the proper response. The force may have guided them, but Obi-Wan briefly thought that dying in a Separatist attack would be less painful than standing in front of the council now. 

“The Senate will require a formal report in order to propose funding the new base.” 

“I’ll make sure to have it on the chancellor’s desk tomorrow evening,” Obi-Wan replied to Mace, trying to hide the exhaustion in his voice. 

“You and Skywalker did well on this mission. You’re dismissed.”

Obi-Wan smiled wearily at the praise, giving the other masters a deep bow before exiting the chamber. Behind him, he heard them discussing which sets of masters and padawans that they were going to send to establish the base once it was approved. He sent a silent wish to the force to never have him return there. 

As he unlocked his door, it took every ounce of energy that he had to not collapse immediately on the floor. His chambers were the same as he left them. Sparsely decorated, save for the few books he had left on his coffee table. A single mug rested in his sink, he had not had time to clean it before leaving. The silence and stillness of the apartment made his heartache. He exhaled a shaky breath and made his way to the shower. 

Peeling off his clothes, he realized that his robes would have to be thrown away. No amount of soap and sewing would be able to repair them. The hot water pounded against his tired frame, the water underneath him turning beige with the run-off dirt. He tried to focus solely on the water: on the smell, on the feeling, on the way it ran down his arms and thighs in uneven streaks. But his mind kept failing him. All Obi-Wan could picture was Anakin. The way the water would have bounced off his curls. The slight curve of lips when Obi-Wan would complain about the water temperature. The contrast of his golden skin against the blue shower tiles. 

Obi-Wan punched the wall, feeling satisfied with the  _ crack _ that came from his fingers. He deserved this. He deserved all of it. Turning the water off, he didn’t even bother to dry himself. He crumbled into his bed, telling himself that the wetness on his cheeks was purely from the shower. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I said I'd post another chapter really quick. No, I never said it would be happy. (I promise things get better soon <3). Thank you for all your comments, kudos, and bookmarks!! They always make me smile.


	9. Late Nights

By the light coming in from his windows, Obi-Wan guessed that it was still early morning. Peeling himself from the bed, he made his way to the ‘fresher. For the first time in nearly a month, he was able to properly stare at himself in the mirror. His beard had grown unruly and straggly towards the ends. His normally neat hair was wild, reaching almost to the midpoints of his ears. 

_ You honestly talked to the council looking like this _ , he said to himself,  _ You look like an absolute madman.  _

Taking out his razor and scissors, he went to work making himself presentable again. He had learned how to cut hair from Satine, who was very adamant on keeping up appearances. While Satine was under lockdown in her palace, she walked up to Obi-Wan and placed a pair of scissors in his hand. 

_ “I need you to cut my hair.” _

_ “Absolutely not.”  _

_ “I need to maintain my image, Obi-Wan. I cannot alert the people as to the situation that I am in.” _

_ “I highly doubt that they’ll notice that your hair has grown a few inches.” _

_ “You underestimate how observant Mandalorians are.”  _

_ “Satine, I am not cutting your hair.” _

_ “Yes, you are.” _

She pressed the scissors harder into his palms, unwavering in her request. Obi-Wan sighed, realizing that it was a battle that he couldn’t win. As he used his fingers to comb through her blonde locks, she barked orders on where and how to cut. 

On their way home from their mission, he recalled Qui-Gon saying that having him learn how to cut hair was a true gift from the force. He was tired of leaving the temple to get his hair trimmed anyway. 

When he was finished, Obi-Wan resembled himself again. Giving himself one last look in the mirror, he tried to not think about Anakin calling him handsome. 

Skipping breakfast, he decided to head down to the gardens. 

Obi-Wan was confident that a person could spend hours in the garden and have it feel as if only minutes had passed. The calming, healing nature of the space was unique, not found anywhere else in the galaxy. One could easily forget that they were actually in the bustling center of Coruscant, and not a foreign planet. 

The Jedi let out a gentle sigh as his bare feet touched the dewy grass. He could almost feel the negative energy seeping from his soles. Walking forward, he took in the gardens with no destination in mind. 

Obi-Wan soon came upon a quiet spot near the river that flowed through the room. The clearing was warm, the grass underneath soft and forgiving. As he sat down, he was able to watch the fish swimming, their scales reflecting beautiful shades of gold and purple. 

Closing his eyes, he reached out to the force. 

_ He was a slightly younger version of himself, his face only missing a few wrinkles near his eyes. Obi-Wan stood at the edge of the temple’s training rooms, watching as Anakin and Ahsoka sparred. Their relationship was still new, both of them learning how to be a padawan and master respectively. For all of his moaning about taking on a padawan, Anakin had grown quickly into his role. He was fiercely protective of her, as anyone would expect. But he allowed her to grow unchained, unrestricted by the more traditional teachings of the council. Any Jedi could feel the power that thrummed between them. The force could not have chosen a better pair.  _

_ Finishing their lesson, Obi-Wan watched as Anakin patted her lightly on the head. She beamed up at him, obviously ecstatic at the praise. With a laugh, she bounded off, leaving Anakin alone.  _

_ “She’s very strong” Obi-Wan commented, walking over to the training mat that Anakin was standing on, “She learns quickly too.”  _

_ “It scares me sometimes,” Anakin said, rubbing a hand across his neck, “I told her that she needed to work on her defensive blocks and she practiced for five hours straight.” _

_ Obi-Wan sent him a pointed look.  _

_ “I once told you that your core muscles were lacking and you did six hundred sit-ups.” _

_ “Like master, like padawan, I suppose.”  _

_ As they walked back to the temple, Anakin gushed about how smart she was and how she was going to make an excellent general one day. He told him that the clones already listened to her better than him.  _

_ “Just don’t forget about who taught you everything,” Obi-Wan said with a laugh.  _

_ Anakin stilled, his head cocking to the side.  _

_ “Trust me, Master, I’d never forget you.”  _

When Obi-Wan opened his eyes, he could not tell if he felt better or not. A deep sense of melancholy rested in his bones. He wanted to believe that the force sent him that memory for a reason. But he refused to get his hopes up. It was probably based in pure coincidence. 

He walked back to his chambers, careful to take the long way. He did not want to risk running into Anakin. He was relieved not to have seen anyone of importance on his way back, as his eyes prickled with tears the entire time. 

Sitting down at his desk, he pulled out his datapad. The report was not going to write itself. 

As the days stretched on, Obi-Wan buried himself in work. He normally enjoyed juggling many tasks, but it seemed as if he was actively trying to drown himself in them lately. He’d take on anything that was asked of him: from teaching younglings to revising council reports. In one case, he even agreed to help catalog a set of Jedi artifacts recovered by a recent mission. 

His peers all praised him for his work and dedication. Each time, Obi-Wan would comment that he just liked to keep busy. Normally, he liked to cherish his time at the temple between deployments, but now, he itched to leave. Occupying his mind was the best way to stop the sadness from bubbling up inside him. 

He had not seen Anakin since they landed. He caught glimpses of him, walking from the training rooms or towards the council chambers, but never long enough to make eye contact. He had not seen much of Ahsoka either, which left him feeling even more hollow. 

“Master Kenobi!” she said, walking over to the older Jedi, “I haven’t seen you in days!”

“I’ve unfortunately been handling a majority of the paperwork for the council. I apologize for being so scarce.”

“You’ve read through all of that?” Ahsoka asked, eyeing the four giant mounts of holos on his table. 

“There’s nothing that a cup of cafe and a good attitude can’t accomplish”.

He felt guilty lying to his grand-Padawan. Sure, both of those traits are helpful to any project. But it helps a whole lot more when you only sleep for an hour a night. 

“If you need any help, please let me know. Skyguy has been miserable to be around.”

“Has he?”

“Like you wouldn’t imagine,” Ahsoka said, sighing dramatically, “All he does is sulk and hang out with Padme. He missed our training sessions twice!”

“That is very strange,” Obi-Wan lied, feeling a pang in his heart, “I wonder what caused it.”

“I think it’s because his favorite Podracer retired. You know how dramatic he can be.”

Obi-Wan gave a shallow laugh, refusing to meet the eyes of the togruta. 

“I know that very well,” he replied, “If you aren’t doing anything, I could use a second set of eyes on these reports.” 

Sitting with his grand-padawan, Obi-Wan realized how much he truly missed her. Anakin may be more outwardly protective, but he looked after her in his own way. Once Ahsoka became a permanent accessory to their missions, Obi-Wan pulled Rex and Cody aside and threatened them with a dishonorable discharge (and maybe some lightsaber burns) if anyone hurt her. He knew that his warning was unneeded since the clones already saw her as a little sister. 

Ahsoka was growing to be an incredible Jedi. She seemed to honor both the best (and worst) parts of himself and Anakin. Fiercely loyal, witty, daring, and a certain flair for the dramatics. Obi-Wan knew that she was going to do brilliant things in the future. 

“Master?” Ahsoka asked, lightly patting his shoulder, “You’ve been staring at the wall.” 

Snapping back to reality, Obi-Wan rubbed his eyes, trying to refocus them. 

“I didn’t even realize. Thank you for alerting me.” 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I promise that I’m okay, Ahsoka. Just a bit tired that’s all.”

“That’s exactly what Anakin has been telling me.” 

Obi-Wan felt himself freeze up.  _ She knew. She had to know. _

“Did something bad happen on the moon? You both have been...off lately.” 

“I assure you that we’re both fine. We did not get a lot of sleep there and we’re just adjusting.”

Ahsoka did not look convinced. She was not a gullible girl by any means. 

“If you say so, Master.” 

The pair continued to work, mostly in silence. Every once in a while, Ahsoka would ask him a question regarding the wording of a phrase or the correct way to format a report. Though she complained about school work and reading often, she retained almost everything she learned. Ahsoka just had a problem with applying her knowledge, especially when she didn’t feel like it. 

Obi-Wan gave a big yawn, stretching his arms and feeling the vertebrates in his back pop. 

“Why don’t you get some rest, Master. I can take over from here.”

“Are you sure? It is awfully late.” 

“I’d rather be here than in the apartment with Anakin.”

Obi-Wan decided not to comment on that. 

“Don’t expect yourself to finish everything. Please wrap up when you’re feeling tired.”

“Ok, ok. I will.”

Obi-Wan laid a land on her shoulder, sending a surge of fondness and appreciation through the force. 

“Thank you, dear one.” 

Walking back into his chambers, he realized how tired he had actually become. For a moment, he contemplated taking an energy bar to keep himself awake. But judging by the dizziness of his vision and the fuzzy feeling in his limbs, he knew that his body couldn’t handle the lack of sleep for much longer. Nightmares be damned. 

After changing into his pajamas, he crawled into his bed. His body was exhausted, and yet, he just couldn’t get his mind to shut off. He recited the Jedi code over and over again, but it served to only wake him up further. Next, he moved to recite the names of every clone in his platoon. And then Anakin’s. And then Plo Koon’s. He was in the middle of recalling the name of every senator in the Galactic Republic when he heard the door to his chambers open. 

There was only one person who knew his code. 

“Anakin?” he called softly, hoping that he wasn’t imaging the sound. In the frame of his door, stood the younger man. He wore his normal black sleep pants and a loose-fitting tunic that showcased his strong arms. His eyes were worn and tied, his dark circles accentuating the scar on his face. 

“I can’t sleep.”

“Neither can I.” 

There was a momentary pause between them. 

“It’s settled then.” 

Anakin wordlessly joined him under the covers, his body falling into the curve of Obi-Wan’s as if they were meant to be. Obi-Wan gripped his waist tight, afraid to let go. 

“Just so you know” Anakin mumbled into Obi-Wan’s chest, “This is just a survival tactic. We both need sleep.”

“Yea. Just a survival tactic.”

Obi-Wan pressed his face into Anakin’s curls, thinking that it was softer than any pillow he’s ever used. He pressed his lips lightly to the other Jedi’s temple, so light that Anakin almost missed it. Within minutes, the men were fast asleep. 

When Obi-Wan woke the next morning, Anakin was gone. But the scent of him still lingered on his sheets. Obi-Wan wrapped himself in the fabric, breathing deeply. 

_ Oh, how he hoped Anakin would come back.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A soft ending in honor of HAYDEN COMING BACK TO STAR WARS <3 I'm so excited!!!! Chapter 10 will be out in a few days!! Thanks as always


	10. Behind Closed Doors

Life began to shift back to normal over the next few months. The two Jedi slowly began to fall back into their rhythm of witty banter and typical bickering. They ordered food from Dex’s, played cards with the clones, and took turns sparring with Ahsoka. To those on the outside, it seemed as if everything was fine between the ex-master and padawan pair. And for the most part, it was. 

Except for their sleeping patterns. 

Every night they were together in the temple, Anakin would wordlessly slip into Obi-Wan’s bed. The men never said a word, never commented on the act. It was an expectation at this point, much like brushing their teeth before bed. Anakin would stand in the doorway, Obi-Wan would motion for him to join him, and within minutes, they were fast asleep. Obi-Wan always preferred missions with the younger Jedi, but now, he craved them. Generals always shared bunks, meaning that he was allowed the luxury of waking up with Anakin tucked in his arms. It made the war bearable. 

Things became difficult when they were separated. No matter how hard they tried, the two men found it impossible to sleep. While Obi-Wan found that his nightmares had decreased in intensity and frequency, the overwhelming loneliness he felt without Anakin by his side was crushing. It had become a ritual between the two to send the other off with a box of energy bars before a mission. They both knew that they’d need it. 

Obi-Wan had guessed that within the past month, he had slept no more than four hours each night. While it was better than his previous stretches without Anakin, the ache that came from exhaustion was settling back into his bones. Every night he would sit awake, hoping to hear the  _ whoosh _ of his door opening. 

Tonight, he was sitting on his couch while reading his datapad. If anyone asked him, he was reading a book on various war strategies from across history. If anyone actually looked, he was reading a cheesy romance novel that he once overheard Padme raving about to her handmaidens. The book helped to remind him that happy endings, at least in some timelines, are possible. 

He was halfway through a chapter when he heard footsteps outside his door. His heart seized in his chest. 

Anakin stepped into his chambers, still clad in his Jedi armor. Dried blood and soot was caked on his face and clothing. His eyes lacked dimension, reflecting nothing but a dull blue. 

“What happened?” Obi-Wan said, rising to meet the younger man. “Did you just land?”

All Anakin did was shake his head feebly, his eyes not leaving the ground. 

“Can I shower here?”

“...Anakin, are you okay?”

“Can I shower here?” he repeated again, his voice becoming even quieter. Obi-Wan’s eyes scanned his figure, noticing that he did not have any pressing injuries. A few scrapes and bruises at most. At least he seemed to be physically okay. 

“Of course. You know where it is.”

Anakin silently headed towards the ‘fresher, not looking back at his former master. Obi-Wan heard the shower turn on and he quickly checked his datapad. There were no messages from the council about any disastrous missions. He silently thanked the force that whatever Anakin was dealing with, wasn’t catastrophically awful. Walking to his closet, he pulled out some fresh clothes and his favorite fluffy towel. 

He knocked on the door, alerting Anakin to his presence. 

“Anakin, I put some clothes and a towel by the sink.”

Anakin just grunted, which Obi-Wan took as a “thank you”. He had only seen Anakin like this once before, right after Ahsoka was lost on a mission. And even then, he wasn’t this bad. When Ahsoka was lost, he had a fire in his belly, a spark for revenge and anger. But the man before him now was nothing but a shell. No fire and brimstone. No electric spark. Just empty eyes and a heaving chest. 

The door to the ‘fresher opened. He was wearing Obi-Wan’s cream sleep pants, the bottoms coming only to his ankles due to his height. The younger man didn’t even bother to put on a shirt. 

“Are you-” Obi-Wan began, before being cut-off by Anakin. 

“Can we  _ please _ just go to bed?”

Obi-Wan nodded, walking towards the bed. He slid in and pulled up the covers for Anakin to join him. Without a word, Anakin laid his head on Obi-Wan’s chest, wrapped his arms around his waist. Obi-Wan began to draw circles on his former padawan’s back, noting how hot his skin was. He curled tighter into Obi-Wan, moving as if he was trying to hide from the world. Obi-Wan felt the telltale wetness of tears on his shirt. 

“It was awful.” Anakin said, not lifting his head from his master’s chest, “We lost so many men. So many good men.” 

“That is the unfortunate side of war. It’s not your fault, Ani.” Obi-Wan hadn’t used that nickname since Anakin was a child, but he had always sensed that it brought great comfort to the man. And Anakin needed all the comfort he could get. 

“It was my fault. I made the order.” His tears turned into light sobs, he balled his fist into Obi-Wan’s chest. “I told them to continue forward.” He took a ragged breath, his nails digging into the other man’s chest. 

“I thought that we had cleared out most of the droids. But they were hidden. They stormed the base and...and...they didn’t come back out.” He inhaled sharply. “We took the base. But so many men died...and they’re just gone...because of  _ me _ .” 

“You have always cared greatly for your men, Anakin. The lives that were lost helped to save thousands of lives from being under Separatist control.” 

“I don’t care what I saved. I care what I lost.” 

“You did the right thing.” 

Anakin nodded weakly, his presence in the force telling Obi-Wan that he still didn’t believe it. He threaded his hands through Anakin’s curls, brushing them out gently. 

“Do you remember right after Geonosis, when you studied under Master Fisto for a few weeks?” 

“I do. That was when he taught me how to swim.” 

“I wanted to keep you away from the war for as long as possible, so I left you behind,” Obi-Wan began, his voice soft, “The council asked me to take a platoon of men and investigate a potential Separatist hideout. We were completely ambushed. I left with fifteen and came home with three.” 

“Really?”

“Yes, and it was a hard mission to handle. It sat with me for a long time, too long. But that mission allowed us to understand how the droids work, especially their formations.”

“Was that why you were so angry when you came back? Not because I still didn’t understand how to do a backstroke?”

Obi-Wan gave a slight laugh. 

“I was not angry at you. Though I’ll never understand why swimming just never clicked with you.” 

“I’m from the desert, remember?”. 

The pair remained silent, tangled in each other. Obi-Wan continued to run his fingers through Anakin’s hair, humming lightly under his breath. As he laid on his chest, Obi-Wan was stricken with how small he looked. He was not a general. He was back to just being Anakin. 

“Obi-Wan?”

“Yes?”

Anakin paused slightly, moving his head so he could look at his old master.

“Thank you.” 

The vice around Obi-Wan’s heart squeezed tight, forcing the air out of his lungs. The sincerity of his words was enough to make him want to cry. He squeezed Anakin tighter. 

“Always.” 

He leaned down and placed a very deliberate kiss on Anakin’s forehead, making sure that he would notice. He saw a smile spread gently on the curly-haired man’s lips. 

“Goodnight, master.”

“Goodnight, dear one.” 

As Anakin stood in front of the council, Obi-Wan could feel his annoyance through the force. He had never enjoyed debriefings, but his mood always worsened when the mission did not go as planned. 

“You were successful in reclaiming the base. Is this correct?” asked Master Koon, his voice crackling through his vocoder. Anakin nodded, his eyes staring forward, refusing to make direct eye contact with anyone. 

“The remaining droids were destroyed?” 

Anakin nodded again. 

“Were the people of Garia brought back to their villages?”

“Yes, Master Ti” replied Anakin, “Before we left, we ensured that the people could survive independently.” Obi-Wan watched as he balled his fists tighter and tighter as they continued to question him. 

“And how many casualties?” asked Master Windu, crossing his legs in his chair. 

“Too many”. 

It was not the response that the council wanted, but it was the only answer that the Jedi Knight could muster. 

“Do you have an exact number?”

Anakin just shook his head, his eyes casting downward. He remained silent.

“Skywalker, I asked if you had an exact number. The council needs it for the formal report.” 

As Obi-Wan sat in his chair, he could feel the anger beginning to spike in his padawan. Their training bond may have been severed years ago, but the frayed remnants still allowed Obi-Wan a peek into Anakin’s mind if he searched hard enough. Anakin inhaled deeply in front of the council, he began to start to open his mouth. 

“Master Windu” Obi-Wan cut in, sending Anakin a quick glance, “The exact number is not a vital part of the report. Let us focus on the survivors.”

“Right, Master Obi-Wan is.” Master Yoda said, nodding to himself, “The base we now have. Look forward, we must.” 

“Thank you, Master,” Anakin said softly, his eyes briefly meeting Yoda’s, “I hope the Republic can use the base for good. To honor the lives of the men I lost.”

“In vain, their lives will not be.”

Anakin exhaled the breath he did not know he was holding. 

The rest of the meeting passed in a blur of war strategies and tactical terms. Obi-Wan would chime in every once in a while, but his mind kept drifting to Anakin. The younger man seemed to keep staring at him, sending him glances when he wasn’t looking. Obi-Wan couldn’t figure out, for the life of him, why. Yoda called an end to the meeting and the masters all filed out. As Obi-Wan left the council chambers, he headed back to his apartment. 

The very last thing he expected to see when opening his door was Anakin, sitting on his couch, a blank expression on his face. 

“I wasn’t expecting you here,” Obi-Wan commented, taking his outer robe off, “Is there something that you need?” 

“Why did you do it?”

“Do what?” Obi-Wan asked, confusion evident in his voice. In the back of his mind, he hoped that he hadn’t upset Anakin. The last thing he needed was to create an argument. 

“During the council meeting…?”

“Anakin, I sincerely have no idea what you’re talking about. The meeting was completely normal.”

“No,” he asked, crossing the room to stand in front of his old master. He looked down at Obi-Wan, an unreadable expression in his eyes. “You defended me.” 

“I’ve defended you hundreds of times before. I don’t understand what-”

Anakin cut him off. 

“No. No, you haven’t. Every time you’ve just sat there, silently.”

“Anakin, I hardly think that’s correct. I can name-”

Anakin placed a hand on his shoulder, effectively shutting him up. 

“This is the first time, Obi-Wan.” he paused, gripping his shoulder tightly. 

Obi-Wan stared back at his ex-padawan, thinking back to every council meeting since Anakin was small. The harder he racked his brain, the more he realized that he was right. He may have defended Anakin in his mind, but he never once opened his mouth. _ It’s no wonder he’s always mad at you _ , the voice in the back of his head sneered,  _ You’re never in his corner _ . 

Silence settled between the two. Anakin kept looking back at him, his eyes occasionally flickering to his lips. A familiar static buzzed between the two. 

Before he could turn back, Obi-Wan gripped the lapels of Anakin’s tunic and drew him close. He collided their lips together, pouring every emotion he’s ever had towards the knight in his kiss. Obi-Wan tangled his hands into Anakin’s curls, pulling his head down even closer. 

This was different from the kiss on the moon. He didn’t give himself time to think. For once in his life, he acted purely on instinct. 

When they pulled apart, he gathered Anakin in his arms, scared to have him leave his grip. 

“Anakin, I am so sorry. For everything.”

“There’s no need to be sorry.” 

“I’ve been a terrible, Master. You shouldn’t forgive me.”

“I can’t say that I’ve been the easiest padawan. You shouldn’t forgive me either.” 

Anakin smiled, the kind of toothy grin that Obi-Wan had not seen in months. It made his heart beat faster. 

“I guess this is a truce then?” 

Anakin pulled Obi-Wan into another kiss, smiling into the other man’s lips. 

“Truce it is.”

They piled into Obi-Wan’s bed, the force around them singing. As Anakin curled up in his arms, Obi-Wan realized something. Something that he didn’t think would ever happen again in his life. 

He was happy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I needed them to be happy or I swear I was going to lose it. Question for all of you: how do y'all feel about smut? I can 100% add it in (not for a little bit though) but if everyone is enjoying the more pg-13 side of things, I can keep it that way. It's not a totally vital part of the plot (just something fun). As always, thanks for reading!!!!


	11. The Talks

As usual, Anakin was gone by the time he woke up. Seeing the vacancy on Anakin’s side of the bed made Obi-Wan long for days at war. The Jedi Master had grown greedy during their deployments together, becoming accustomed to waking up next to Anakin. Some days, he would force himself to rise an hour before he actually needed to be up. It was in the quiet of morning that he could truly admire the man next to him. Anakin’s golden skin always seemed to compliment Obi-Wan’s pale and freckled frame. He loved to run his hands across Anakin’s back, memorizing each scar and blemish. It was in these hours that he forgot that he was Obi-Wan Kenobi, General in the Grand Army of the Republic, youngest member of the Jedi council, and one of the greatest negotiators in the galaxy. Here, he was just Obi-Wan. Just a man who was hopelessly infatuated with Anakin Skywalker. 

Looking over to Anakin’s side of the bed, he noticed his datapad propped up on a pillow. Unlocking it, he saw that Anakin had drawn a single heart in his notes. It was lopsided and hastily done, but Obi-Wan never wanted to stop looking at it. With a smile, he saved the note to his datapad, vowing to never delete it. 

Over the next few weeks, Obi-Wan felt as if he was living in the senate building. The towering structure was never Obi-Wan’s favorite place in the galaxy. The corruption and greed of the lifeforms inside always made the force feel stale and bitter there. It made him want to shower immediately upon exiting. While the council would send him out on short (and intense) missions, he found that he was constantly getting roped into some form of galactic politics during his stays at the temple. And he  _ hated _ politics. He thanked the force that all he had to do was drop-off a collection of reports and head back to the temple. 

“Master Kenobi!” a voice said behind him. Obi-Wan could hear the distinct clicking of heels as the figure caught up to him. 

“Senator Amidala, what do I owe the pleasure?” 

“I realize that you’re a very busy man, but would you care to escort me to the senate chambers?” Padme extended her arm, telling Obi-Wan that he did not really have a choice in the manner. It was easy to see how Anakin fell so quickly for her. Obi-Wan interlocked their arms and began heading towards the entrance. 

“So I’ve heard you and General Skywalker’s teamwork has been remarkable lately,” she said, a slight smirk appearing on her lips, “It is nice to see you both working so well together.”

“General Skywalker is a fantastic asset to the Republic and the Jedi Order. I am honored to work with him.”

“In that case, it would be foolish for you to do anything to diminish that bond” Padme replied, turning her head to stare Obi-Wan directly in the eyes, “The success you have as a team far outweighs both of your solo accomplishments.” 

Obi-Wan choked slightly, his palms suddenly feeling very sweaty. 

“I would happen to agree, Senator.” 

“Wonderful” she smiled, placing her hand lightly over Obi-Wan’s. Her voice became softer, “I am truly happy for the both of you.”

“Thank you, Padme.” 

The pair walked in relative silence for the rest of the journey. Obi-wan felt an odd sense of satisfaction. Though the council would never accept their relationship, it was nice to hear that  _ someone _ did. Especially that someone being Anakin’s best friend. 

“Ah, Senator Amidala, Master Kenobi, how nice to see you,” a voice called from behind them. The pair turned around to see Chancellor Palpatine walking towards them, his maroon robes billowing behind him. 

His eyes immediately went towards their interlocked arms, an odd look crossing his face. 

“I do hope I am not interrupting anything.” 

“Not at all Chancellor,” Obi-Wan replied, loosening his hold on Padme, “I was just escorting Senator Amidala to the senate chambers.” 

“Very admirable Master Jedi” he smiled, nodding slightly towards him, “If you do not mind, I would like to join Padme for the rest of the journey. I’d quite like to gain her insight on the bill that is being voted on.”

Untangling their arms, Obi-Wan bowed to the both of them. 

“Thank you for your conversation, Padme,” he said, turning to look at Palpatine, “Good day Chancellor”. 

As he walked away, he had the feeling that someone was watching him. But he passed it off as the general energy of the senate building. He was more than happy to leave as soon as possible. 

“I got dinner,” he heard Anakin say as he entered his chambers. Anakin stood in his kitchen, clutching a bag that was dripping grease. His hair was slightly damp, telling Obi-Wan that he had already showered. 

“I thought you were supposed to be cooking tonight?”

“Well, I burned the first course. So the force told me to get Dex’s.”

“The force or your inability to read a recipe?”

Anakin laughed, leaning in to kiss his Master. 

“Both.” 

Anakin had picked up their usual orders, Manaan sliders for Obi-Wan and Fried Endorian chicken for himself. The older Jedi was known not to take pleasure in many things, but a good burger was one of them. 

“I ran into Padme today,” Obi-Wan said, stealing a fry from Anakin’s plate, much to his protests, “I assume you’re the one who told her about us.” 

Anakin blushed, a hand shooting up to rub his neck. 

“I’m sorry. I just got really excited and had to tell someone and-”

Obi-Wan waved his hand, cutting him off. 

“Stop that. I just wanted to make sure that we weren’t being too obvious.”

“So you’re not mad?”

“Not at all, dear one. If I’m being honest, I find it endearing.”

“What did she say?” Anakin curiously asked, popping a fry into his mouth. 

“Besides a thinly veiled threat about me breaking your heart, she said that she’s happy for us.”

“That sounds like Pads.”

“I’m just glad she doesn’t hate me.”

“How could anyone hate you, Obi-Wan?”

“Tell that to the plethora of people who want me dead.” 

Anakin laughed, leaning over to place a kiss on Obi-Wan’s cheek. In moments like these, Obi-Wan found it hard to remember that life existed outside of Anakin Skywalker. The younger man had a funny way of consuming him, just with a simple look. After cleaning up and taking a quick shower, the men piled into Obi-Wan’s bed. 

“How long do you expect to be gone for this mission,” Obi-Wan asked, idly playing with Anakin’s hair, “From the mission report, it doesn’t seem to be too rough.”

“Hopefully only a few days,” he replied, leaning closer into the touch, “Rex and I are just touching base with the relief efforts on Ryloth.”

“I’m guessing you leave at daybreak?” 

“The council wouldn’t have it any other way.” 

“If you come home with any injuries, I’m ordering Cody to destroy Rex.” 

“You’re cute when you’re protective,” Anakin replied, drawing his Master into a kiss. It was not filled with amped passion or lust. It was a lazy kiss. The kind that made Obi-Wan think of springtime and featherlight touches. In some ways, it was his favorite kind of kiss. 

“I have no idea how I got so lucky,” he mused, more to himself than to Anakin. 

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not sure how a washed-up Jedi like myself could wind up with someone like you,” he commented, raising a brow when Anakin sat up to face him. 

“You don’t mean that do you?”   
“Well of course. You could walk into any place in the galaxy and come home with twenty men in your arms. I’m not sure how I tricked such a remarkable man to be stuck with old, brooding, me” Obi-Wan began, feeling the tendrils of anxiety begin to course through his veins, “I mean, look at me. I have wrinkles, my hair is graying. I am certainly not a padawan anymore. I hardly fit the bill of someone who deserves to be with you.”

Anakin stared at him, disbelief shining in his eyes. He reached over to grab Obi-Wan’s hands. 

“You could put every single lifeform in the galaxy in front of me, and I’d always choose you.”

“Dear one, it’s perfectly okay to tell me that you wouldn’t. I mean I get-”

“Shut up,” Anakin cut him off, squeezing his hands tighter, “You’re the only man I ever want.” 

Obi-Wan opened his mouth and then quickly shut it. Arguing with Anakin was pointless and he didn’t want to send the other man off on a negative note. He dropped his gaze to stare at his hands, not being able to believe the sincerity in his old padawan’s eyes. Sensing his master’s doubt, he pressed a kiss to his hand.

“Come here,” Anakin said, laying back and opening his arms. The older man tentatively laid his head on Anakin’s chest, an odd sensation for Obi-Wan, as the role was so often reversed. But as Anakin lightly threaded his hands through his hair, he felt the monster in the pit on his belly subside. He felt safe, warm. Anakin leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. 

Obi-Wan fell asleep to the sound of Anakin’s heartbeat that night. 

Anakin had been gone for less than a day and Obi-Wan was already bored. He felt as if his head was going to explode if he ran into another Senator asking him to read over their proposal. When the council told him that once Anakin returned, they’d be going on a mission again, Obi-Wan swore that he could have kissed Yoda. He was sick of politics. 

So when Ahsoka approached him early in the afternoon, her force signature erupting with nervousness, it was fair to say that it had piqued his curiosity. She had requested to speak with him in private that evening, adamantly stating that she shouldn’t discuss the contents of the conversation before then. Obi-Wan knew that his grand-padawan could find herself in trouble, but she normally found her own resolution for it. 

“Ahsoka?” he called out, entering the chambers she shared with Anakin. 

“In here, Master!” she replied, coming out from the kitchen with two streaming mugs, “I made us some tea.” 

Obi-Wan smiled warmly at her, taking a mug from her hands. He sat down next to her on the couch, smirking lightly at how her feet didn’t quite touch the floor. He watched as the padawan took a long sip, looking as if she was trying to drown herself in the tea. 

“What did you want to discuss, young one?”

“Well, it’s just that...I mean, I’m probably looking too much into this...But I just-” she rambled, never finishing her thought. She turned her mug in her hand, staring at it intensely. The togruta sighed deeply. 

“I’m worried about Anakin,” she blurted up, looking at Obi-Wan with tears rising in her eyes, “I think something is seriously wrong.” 

Out of all of the things in the galaxy, this was the last thing Obi-Wan expected. 

“What do you mean?”

“I...I think he’s on death sticks.”

“You think he’s  _ what _ ?” Obi-Wan choked out, trying to swallow a laugh. “Are you sure that  _ you’re _ okay, Ahsoka?”

“I’m being serious.” she huffed, crossing her arms, “Every night for the past few months, he’s been sneaking out at night. He tries to be quiet, but he’s louder than a bantha when he tries to sneak around.”

“And how does this relate to him being on death sticks?”

“I didn’t want to believe it either, but it makes sense!” Ahsoka stood up from the couch, beginning to pace the room. “When he’d leave at night, he’d be so tense and wound-up. But the next morning? He was a completely different Jedi! Calm and nice and  _ rational _ .”

“He could have just left to meditate in the gardens.”

“I thought of that. But why sneak out in the first place? Why not just tell me?”

Obi-Wan was not sure whether to laugh or cry. The care Ahsoka had for her master was so palpable. But he wasn’t sure if it was his place to explain their relationship to her. Or if he should even tell her at all. 

“I honestly don’t think that he’s on death sticks.”

“Then why is he always so moody and sleepless when we go on missions together? It’s because he can’t get his supply!”

Obi-Wan sighed, rising to meet his grand-padawan. 

“I’ve known Anakin for many years. I can assure you that he’s not on death sticks.”

“Then why is he sneaking out?”

“He’s probably just taking walks around the temple. When he comes home, I’ll look into it for you. In the meantime, why don’t you go get some rest yourself?” 

“Promise you’ll talk to him?”

“I promise, young one. The bond you have with Anakin is a very strong one. I commend your courage in coming to talk to me.” 

Ahsoka gave a weak smile. 

“Thank you, Master.” 

Obi-Wan smiled as she walked off to her bedroom. As he returned to his own chambers, he had one thought running through his head. 

He needed to talk to Anakin, and he needed to talk to Anakin  _ quickly _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've wanted to write this chapter for SO LONG. After reading all your comments, I'll be adding some smut. Keep an eye out <3


	12. Corellian Whiskey

Obi-Wan paced in circles like a caged animal. He pounded his fists against his temples, growling in frustration at how  _ stupid _ he was. He swallowed thickly, trying to recall if anyone had noticed a change in their behavior. His mind combed over every interaction, every passing glance in the temple hallways. He analyzed every conversation, every fleeting glance. When Master Fisto said to “have a nice evening” the night when Anakin was due to come home, had he known? 

_ Get a hold of yourself, Kenobi _ , he said to himself, inhaling deeply,  _ You’re smarter than this _ . 

In battle, Obi-Wan was known to always keep a level head. The planet could be collapsing around him and he’d still have enough sense to formulate a plan. The Obi-Wan who was currently making laps around his coffee table was a mockery of the level-headed General. 

He tried to remind himself that he was a purveyor of temple gossip; if anything about Anakin was circulating, he would have heard it. When Anakin was with Padme, everyone from Bail Organa to Master Luminara seemed to pass him along hourly updates on their relationship. If anyone had suspected something was wrong with either him or his ex-padawan, it would have reached him by now. Or so he hoped. 

Quickly noting how small his quarters were feeling, he grabbed his cloak and sought out his speeder.

Pulling up to the bar felt as if he was meeting an old friend, except if said friend was a run-down, dilapidated hovel that reeked of booze and debauchery. Despite its appearance, Obi-Wan still felt a sense of familiarity and calmness from the space. The bar itself had not changed much in the months he was gone. The flickering neon signs were still hung haphazardly on the walls, casting shadows of red and purple on the patrons. A few of the barstools had been replaced, their shiny vinyl covers standing out against the torn, ratty ones. Obi-Wan figured that the previous seats were ruined in a fight. Seating himself near the end of the bar, he noticed that his old bartender had been replaced by an older, human woman. He hoped that the twi'lek girl was okay. In his mind, he constructed a world where she found a better job, met a new partner, moved off the planet. But judging by the two blasters strapped to the thighs of the current bartender, he figured that his reality was the complete opposite of what had actually happened. 

“What can I get you, hun?” asked the bartender, her voice raspy but welcoming. 

“Corellian whiskey. No ice, please.” 

“You realize Corellian whiskey costs a good credit around here?”

Obi-Wan gave a slight smile, sliding over a pile of credits that would more than cover the drink. 

“This isn’t my first visit.”

The bartender raised an eyebrow, quickly collecting the credits and pocketing the change before any patrons could notice. Obi-Wan watched as she grabbed the bottle from the top shelf and filled the glass a little more than normal. 

“Let me know if I can getcha anything else.”

“Thank you.” 

The first sip of Corellian whiskey always burned. It lit everything from your lips to your lungs on fire. But once you overcame the initial shock, it left a warm trail in its wake. The first time he tried it, he immediately spat the drink out, making Qui-Gon tear up with laughter. 

_ This is whiskey, Obi-Wan. It’s meant to be sipped, not swallowed. _

Taking another small sip, the Jedi master smiled at the memory. But his fond reminiscing was cut short by the pang of grief in his stomach. He desperately wished that Qui-Gon was sitting at the bar with him. Both of them had a funny way of talking through a situation without actually ever bringing up the main topic. For the pair, it was their own language. A collection of metaphors and stories that always seemed to lead the other to a solution. 

“What brings Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi to these parts?” a voice said, sliding into the seat next to him. 

“I’d quite appreciate keeping our line of work a bit more discreet while we’re in here, Vos”, Obi-Wan harshly whispered, his eyes scanning the room to ensure that no one overheard. 

“Oh relax, Kenobi. Even if you said you were a Jedi, no one would ever think to find one in a dive bar like this.”

“I suppose so.”

“Back to my original question, what brings you here? You and Skywalker break-up or something?”

Obi-Wan choked on his drink, the whiskey shooting flames into his chest.

“Knight Skywalker is currently on a mission. The council sent a newsletter about recent deployments two nights ago.”

“Do you really think I read those?”

“As a fellow Jedi, I would hope that you do.”

Quinlan gave a hearty laugh, calling the bartender over to refill Obi-Wan’s drink and serve him a beer of his own. By the way he was joking with the woman, Obi-Wan guessed that it was not the Jedi’s first time here either. 

“But really, what in the galaxy brings you here?” 

“Can’t I enjoy a drink?”

“Never said you couldn’t. But it is strange seeing you here alone. You and Anakin seem to be quite the dynamic duo.” Quinlan wiggled his eyebrows, a playful glint dancing in his eyes. “What do they say?  _ Where you find a Kenobi, you’ll find a Skywalker not far behind _ ?”

Obi-Wan placed his drink down with a heavy  _ thud _ , thinking briefly that he may have cracked the glass. 

“Whatever you’re trying to say, Vos, just get on with it.”

Quinlan raised his hands in mock surrender, a grin tugging playfully at his cheeks. 

“So my suspicions are correct. I never pegged you for liking the tall, brooding types.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Obi-Wan, come on. Drop the whole Jedi thing for a second.”

“We live by the code. It’s not something that we can just  _ drop _ .”

“Pretend then.”

Obi-Wan took a few more sips of his drink, the whiskey beginning to enter his bloodstream. His mind was screaming at him to shut up and take his speeder home immediately. But something tugged in his stomach, telling him to stay. 

“Fine.”

“Then I’ll ask you again: why are you here?”

He exhaled loudly, trying to come up with the best explanation. He thought about lying, telling Vos that he was here because he simply missed Anakin. But Quinlan was smarter than he presented himself to be. 

“Too many people are finding out about Anakin and I. It’s only a matter of time before it reaches the council.”

“You’re not serious are you?”

Obi-Wan blinked, cocking his head. 

“I am completely serious. He and I have not been careful and-”

Vos cut him off with a barking laugh, one that seemed to turn a few heads towards them. Obi-Wan stared at the other man in confusion, unaware that anything he said was even remotely funny. 

“First off, no one at the temple thinks anything remotely romantic is happening between you too. If anything, Windu and Yoda think that you’ve finally managed to reign Skywalker in.”

“Then why did you insinuate before that you knew?” 

“Why else would you choke when I mentioned you and Anakin breaking up? The correct answer to my insinuations would have been” Vos paused for a second, straightening his back and giving his best impression of the Jedi Master, “Knight Skywalker and I are not in a romantic relationship. The implications that we have are highly inappropriate and a disgrace to the Jedi code.”

“Wonderful impression.” Obi-Wan deadpanned, “But you’re positive no one thinks anything is happening? Not even a shred of suspicion?” 

“The temple gossip seems to revolve more around Aayla and Bly than anyone else these days.”

“And you’re certain about this, correct? No one has mentioned anything to you? Made a remark that seemed off-color?”

“The only thing that I’ve heard that seemed wrong was when Windu said that Anakin was shaping up to be a skilled and accomplished Jedi.”

Obi-Wan gave a sigh of relief, his shoulders drooping slightly as he released the tension from them. 

“You really shouldn’t worry so much. You’re going to get wrinkles on that pretty face.”

“Very funny, Vos.”

Quinlan smiled, taking a sip of his own drink. “But really, with how the war is going, I don’t think that the council is looking to expel Jedi anytime soon, especially their two best generals.” 

“They could always strip us of our ranks. Ask us both to step down after the war is finished.” 

“Let me ask you this: If you had to choose between the council and Anakin, which would you take?”

Obi-Wan felt the answer on the tip of his tongue. He’s known the answer. He’s known the answer for over a decade. But even now, he’s too scared to say it. Afraid that his answer will manifest the one feeling that he’s been terrified to accept back into his life again. 

“I don’t know.”

“I think you do, Obi-Wan.” 

Silence lapsed between them, the weight of Quinlan’s response hanging heavily in the air. Obi-Wan knew that he was right. But the words just couldn’t leave his lips. He vowed that one day he’d be strong enough to tell Anakin. 

“You know, you interrogated me on why  _ I’m _ here. What about you?” 

“Well, my reason just walked through the door.” 

Obi-Wan turned to see a cloaked form slink through the door. The figure’s face was covered by shadows, but he could see slim, gray fingers peeking out from beneath the cloak. In the force, he could sense a familiar signature and couldn’t quite place it until-

“Is that Ventress?”

The other Jedi gave a curt nod, his eyes briefly casting downwards. If Obi-Wan hadn’t known better, Quinlan almost seemed to be nervous. 

“How about this,” he said, rising out of his seat, “I keep my mouth shut. You keep your mouth shut. Deal?” 

“Deal.”

The pair shook on it, each of them grasping the other man’s hand harder than normal. Though he didn’t say it, Obi-Wan could feel a sense of relief flooding through Vos. Nodding again, he headed towards a sheltered booth in the back. 

“Oh, Obi-Wan,” Quinlan said, turning back for a split second, “there’s one last piece of temple gossip I forgot to tell you.”

“And that is?”

“Everyone talks about how much happier you are these days. Keep Skywalker around.” 

Obi-Wan smiled, the type of smile that he could feel in his toes. 

“I plan on it.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update! Life got very crazy on my end. The next chapter is already up as an apology!! Thank you all for sticking around <3


	13. The Reveal

Waiting for Anakin to come home was always agonizing, but Obi-Wan felt as if he was going to crawl out of his skin. Between his conversations with Ahsoka and Vos, his emotions seemed to be constantly shifting. He was terrified about the future, about what would become of them after the war. But a more overwhelming part of him just wanted to live in the present, to hold Anakin in his arms and take whatever the galaxy could throw at him. 

As he settled down on his couch, he pulled out his datapad. He knew that he was going to be deployed within the next week, so he decided that he might as well update himself on the battlefield as much as possible. He always hated when Cody had the upper hand on information during the briefings. 

Scanning over the victories and losses, he could barely tell if they were even winning the war anymore. For every battle won, it felt as if they suffered losses twice as large. The tabloids and members of the council seemed optimistic about the outcome, but Obi-Wan still felt a looming sense of darkness in the force. While he couldn’t pinpoint exactly where it was coming from, it always seemed to grow larger when the senate was in session. Obi-Wan figured that much of it came from his distaste for politics. 

His heart stuttered in his chest when he heard his door open. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Anakin called, a grin plastered on his face. 

Obi-Wan jumped to his feet, rushing over to meet him. He quickly eyed him over, noticing no new scrapes or bruises. Anakin even looked as if he had gotten more sleep than usual.  _ Rex gets to live another day _ , he thought. Obi-Wan ran a hand through Anakin’s curls. They were soft and free of tangles, telling him that he stopped to shower before coming over. Obi-Wan cupped Anakin’s cheek, his thumb tracing over the knight’s cheekbones. 

“How was the mission, dear one?”

Anakin huffed, rolling his eyes as he did so. 

“Boring. I’m not sure why I even had to go. The supply lines seemed to be fine and all the camps we set up were still in place. Honestly, it was a complete waste of my time when I could have been-”

Obi-Wan stopped listening, too entranced by the man in front of him to fully hear his ranting. When he was fired up, Anakin always looked so beautiful. The way a soft blush would rise in his cheeks. The way his blue eyes would slightly darken, making them stand out against his golden skin even more. It never failed to take Obi-Wan’s breath away. 

_ Force, he missed him.  _

Cutting off Anakin’s ramblings, Obi-Wan grabbed him by the front of his tunic and yanked him down for a kiss. He moved to tangle one hand in Anakin’s hair, tugging lightly on the curls. The older Jedi needed to be closer to him, to close every gap between them. Desperation thrummed between them, telling Obi-Wan that he was missed as well. He pulled away, peppering kisses along Anakin’s jawline. Above him, Anakin moaned as he moved down his neck, sucking lightly on the tanned skin. 

“I thought you wanted to hear how the mission went?” Anakin panted, his voice already sounding strained, “I didn’t even get to explain how bad the weather was yet.”

Obi-Wan laughed, moving to pull Anakin’s tunic down lower to expose more skin. He bit down softly, teeth scraping against the hollow of his throat. Anakin gave another soft moan. 

Obi-Wan looked up at him, cocking an eyebrow. 

“We could always stop.”

“On second thought, carry on.” 

Obi-Wan pushed him up harder against the wall, shoving his thigh between Anakin’s legs. He ran his hands along his sides, feeling the tight muscle between the black robes. He returned to his attack on Anakin’s throat, breathing in his scent. Anakin always smelled of leather, engine oil, and something that Obi-Wan could only describe as  _ home _ . 

Without hesitation, he sucked hard on his collarbone, making sure to leave a mark. 

“ _ Master please, _ ” Anakin whined above him, grinding against Obi-Wan’s frame. 

“Patience, dear one,” he replied, moving to slowly unlatch his partner’s belt, “we have no reason to rush.”

In normal instances, Obi-Wan never minded wearing Jedi robes. But he swore that he never hated the garments more than when he was trying to remove them from Anakin. There were always too many layers, too many ties. As he watched the last of the cloth fall from Anakin’s shoulders, he had to remind himself not to stare. 

“You are so beautiful,” he muttered against Anakin’s skin, feeling the warmth radiating from it. Anakin blushed at the praise, biting his lips to stop another moan from escaping. Obi-Wan pressed light kisses across his chest, continuing to shower the man beneath him with compliments. 

He dropped to his knees, eyes meeting Anakin’s as he moved to unbutton his pants. The younger man nodded, giving Obi-Wan the okay to move forward. 

The force around them pulsed, sending light shockwaves through their bodies. All Obi-Wan could sense was  _ Anakin.  _ Every slight gasp, every tiny roll of his hips was amplified. As he looked up to see Anakin, his head leaning back against the wall, his hand attempting to muffle the moans from his mouth, he felt a wave of arousal course through him. It was in these moments that Obi-Wan truly believed that he was invincible.

He licked a stripe up Anakin’s cock, smirking at the sounds Anakin was making above him. For such a strong man, he was so easy to unravel. Obi-Wan suckled on the tip before moving to bob his head down lower. 

“Obi-Wan,  _ fuck _ .”

The copper-haired man chuckled, sending enough vibration to Anakin’s cock to make his knees buckle in response. He felt Anakin’s hands tangle in his hair, desperate to grab hold of something. After bobbing down a few more times, he pulled away, replacing his mouth with his hand. 

“You are so perfect, Ani” he cooed, tightening his grasp on his former padawan, “You always are so good to me.”

“T-Thank you” stuttered Anakin, his face reddening even more, “ _ Fuck _ , it feels so good.”

Obi-Wan quickened his face, pressing kisses over his thighs. He licked around Anakin’s sharp hip bones, noticing the light sheen on sweat on the golden skin. 

“Tell me what you want.”

“ _ You _ . Please, Master. Just you.”

“I think that can be arranged.” 

As they laid panting on Obi-Wan's bed, Anakin moved to rest his head in the crook of his former master’s neck. His breath came out in short, hot bursts, sending a chill down Obi-Wan’s spine. Basking in the afterglow, neither wanted to move. 

“Are you alright, Anakin?”

“More than alright, Master. I’m just going to need a second.”

“What happened to the legendary stamina of the Chosen One?”

Anakin gave a weak laugh, nipping at Obi-Wan’s throat. 

“Kriff off.” 

Obi-Wan ran his hands along Anakin’s back, a simple pleasure that he vowed to never take for granted. A comfortable silence filled the room, the only real sounds coming from their breathing. From outside, they could faintly hear the speeders and sirens of Coruscant. 

“Did anything happen here at the temple while I was gone?”

Obi-Wan coughed lightly, stilling for a second. 

“Well...I do have something to talk to you about.”

“Is everything okay?” 

“Everything is fine, dear one. Ahsoka and I had an interesting conversation though.”

“Snips? Is she okay?” Anakin asked, panic flashing quickly in the force around them. 

“She’s perfectly fine. She’s just worried about you.”

“About me? Why?”

Obi-Wan used his free hand to rub his eyes, trying to come up with a way to explain it. In the time Anakin was gone, he probably should have come up with a better way to broach the subject. 

“She’s convinced that you’re on death sticks.” 

That I’m on  _ what _ ?!” Anakin questioned, sitting up from his spot on Obi-Wan’s chest, “Did she hit her head during training?”

“Her reasoning is fair. She noticed you always sneaking out at night and how miserable you are on missions without me. Ahsoka believed that your bad moods were caused by a lack of supplies.” 

Anakin blinked, staring at Obi-Wan in surprise. The older master thought that he looked absolutely adorable. 

“What are we going to do?”

“We have to tell her, Anakin,” Obi-Wan said, linking their hands together, “It’s better she finds out through us.”

“Are you sure that you want to tell her?”

“It’s the only solution that I can think of...at least the only solution that won’t break her trust.”

Anakin mulled it over for a moment, pressing a light kiss to Obi-Wan’s hand. 

“You’re right.”

Obi-Wan pulled him down for a kiss, reveling in how sweet his partner tasted. 

“It’ll be okay.”

“I hope so.” 

“Ahsoka!” Obi-Wan called, jogging slightly to meet up with the small togruta, “How are you?” 

“I’m fine Master Kenobi,” she smiled, “I’m just glad I’m finally finished with my Philosophy homework.”

“Philosophy was always Anakin’s least favorite subject as well.” 

“Really?” she asked, her montrails tilting slightly. 

“He would complain for hours. Days even.” 

“Sounds like my master.” 

“Speaking of him,” Obi-Wan replied, “Would you be free this evening to have dinner with us? In my quarters?”

“Is this about…” 

“We do have an explanation for everything.”

“Is he okay?”

Obi-Wan smiled, putting a hand on her shoulder. The love she held for Anakin squeezed tightly at his own heart. 

“I promise that he is completely okay. We’ll explain everything tonight.”

“I’ll see you then.” 

Obi-Wan nodded, watching as she walked away. He wasn’t sure how she would take the news. But he just hoped that it wouldn’t destroy her and Anakin’s bond. When he had found out about Qui-Gon and Tahl, he was shocked to say the very least. But after the initial feeling of confusion passed, things fell back into their normal rhythm. He sent a wish to the force that the same would happen with her. 

He opened the door to his chambers, hearing Anakin talking to someone on the comm. 

“One order of fried Endorian chicken, yes, extra crispy. One Shawda club sandwich- _ oh _ -and a side of Denta Bean ice cream. That’ll be all. The name on the order will be Kenobi.”

Obi-Wan heard the clicking of the comm turning off. 

“I thought we were cooking tonight?”

“I just figured that if we’re going to ruin Ahsoka’s life, we might as well treat her with some good food.”

“We’re not going to ruin her life,” Obi-Wan replied, kissing Anakin lightly on the forehead, “I think she’ll just be relieved that you’re not on drugs.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I normally am.”

Anakin laughed, swatting him lightly on the arm. 

“I’m going to go pick up the food, I’ll be back in a few.” 

As he waited for Anakin to return, he placed a few plates and cutlery on his coffee table. His quarters didn’t have enough room for a proper dining area, but his small living room worked just fine for the three of them. Obi-Wan felt his nerves begin to stir, the familiar sinking feeling curling in his gut. He didn’t think that Ahsoka would snitch on them. He had far too much faith in his grand-padawan. But he couldn’t shake the feeling that she would be disappointed. 

He heard Anakin and Ahsoka walk in, both carrying bags of food. 

“Master I don’t think that we need this much food.”

“You say that every time we order and yet, we seem to never have leftovers.” 

Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

“Whatever, Skyguy.” 

The three settled down in Obi-Wan’s living room. Ahsoka took the armchair while Obi-Wan and Anakin sat on the cramped couch. They quickly piled food onto their plates, the conversation between them light but guarded. Neither party wanted to dive into the topic right away. 

As they began to finish up, their bites slowing, Obi-Wan decided that it was time. 

“Ahsoka” he began, sending a quick glance to Anakin, “There is something that we have to tell you.” 

“Is everything okay?”

“Everything is fine, Snips,” Anakin said, sending a wave of comfort through their bond, “I promise that I’m not on death sticks.” 

“Then why are you sneaking around so much? It’s making me worried.” 

“First, don’t worry about me so much, Snips. Your Master always finds a way out of trouble.”

Ahsoka shook her head, smiling slightly. 

“Second...well... I mean, there’s really no good way to explain this. It’s definitely not what I think you’re expecting and…”

Obi-Wan grabbed Anakin’s hand, tangling their fingers together. He raised them and pressed a light kiss to his knuckles. 

“Ahsoka, your master and I are in a relationship.” 

The togruta’s jaw immediately fell open, her blue eyes darting furiously between the two. She remained completely silent, trying to comprehend the information that was just laid in front of her. 

“The two of you? Like  _ together-together _ ? How long? What?” she replied, unable to form a coherent thought, “This isn’t some type of prank right?” 

“Yes, together-together, Snips. We’ve been this way for a few months now.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“We didn’t know how you’d react,” Obi-Wan said, “We obviously can’t be too vocal about it and honestly, you’ve been the only person to notice anything different.” 

“I would have never guessed,” she replied, a slight laugh in her voice, “I understand why you thought I was crazy for thinking Anakin was on death sticks.” 

“I still can’t believe you thought that I was on death sticks.”

“Hey!” she defended, placing her hands loosely by her hips, “I wasn’t the one sneaking around and being all weird.” 

“I am not weird!”

“You’re pretty weird,” Obi-Wan said, squeezing his hand and leaning lightly into the other Jedi. 

“So what happens now?” asked Ahsoka. 

“No one can know about this,” Anakin said, his voice somber, “We are trusting you to keep this a secret. Our relationship cannot leave the walls of this room.”

“I promise I won’t say a word.”

“Thank you, young one.”

“Can you both promise me something?”

“Of course,” they both replied at the same time. 

“Can you keep the PDA to a minimum? I might puke if I see you two kissing.”

The older Jedi both barked out a laugh, any apprehension and fear leaving their bodies. 

“We can most definitely do that.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you are all still enjoying this!!


	14. Yerbana

“Are you sure everything is okay?” asked Obi-Wan as he watched Anakin pack and unpack his bag for the third time. 

“I’m fine,” he replied, painting an obviously fake smile on his lips. He shoved his datapad and a few robes into the backpack, only to make a displeased face at the arrangement and pull them out again. 

“I’ve known you for long enough to know that you never double-check your belongings. What’s going through your mind?” 

Anakin sighed, shoving the items into the bag once more before snapping the bag closed. Obi-Wan could see the gears turning behind his eyes, obviously struggling to formulate how he was feeling. 

“Why did the council choose me for this mission?”

“The council needed two accomplished Jedi to command this siege. Seeing that we are the best team in the order, the decision was almost unanimous.” 

Anakin sighed again, his chest heaving dramatically. 

“The almost unanimous part is what’s bothering me.” 

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow, confused as to where Anakin was heading with the conversation. Silently, he grabbed Anakin’s hand and led him to the couch to continue the conversation there. 

“I had breakfast with the chancellor this morning,” Anakin began, mindlessly stroking the back of Obi-Wan’s hand with his thumb, “He told me that he asked the council to assign me to protect Padme on a peace mission to Bespin. He seemed very...agitated that the council went against his orders.” 

“I can understand why he’s upset,” Obi-wan said carefully, the topic of the chancellor was always a sore subject between the two, “But if we are able to destroy the Separatists' hold on Yerbana, it could prove to be a real turning point in the war.”

“But aren’t we supposed to follow the chancellor’s orders?” 

“We are Jedi. Not soldiers, Anakin. I know that you have a great respect for the man, but we need you on the battlefield, not on Bespin.”

“What about Padme?” Anakin snapped, pulling his hand away, “The chancellor has to know something. Maybe another plot on her life? Why else would he request me specifically?” 

Obi-Wan bit back a sigh. Conversations surrounding the chancellor always took a turn for the worst. He and Anakin could find a middle ground on many things, but the role of Palpatine was not one of them. 

“He is very close to Padme. He would always want to partner her with someone that she is both familiar and friendly with.” He reached over to grab Anakin’s hand again, bringing it lightly to his lips. “Plus the council has already assigned Shaak Ti to accompany her. Master Ti is a very skilled Jedi, you know this.” 

“But what if something happens to her?” 

“Nothing is going to happen.” Obi-Wan soothed, “And even in the event that something did, Shaak Ti is more than capable of handling it.” 

“...I guess.” 

“We still have a few hours before we ship out. Why don’t you go talk to Padme and see how she’s feeling. It may help your nerves.” 

Anakin smiled, a real smile this time. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to Obi-Wan’s lips, serving as an apology for snapping previously. 

“Thank you, Master.” 

“I’ll see you and Ahsoka in the hanger this evening.”

Pressing a final kiss to his forehead, Anakin left Obi-Wan’s quarters in search of the senator. 

As Obi-Wan made his way to the ship, he made sure to soak in the calming aura of the temple as he walked. The temple always acted as a pacifier before a mission to him, bringing him a profound sense of comfort. His walk allowed him to collect his thoughts and prepare for the upcoming battle. He never knew when he’d be in the temple again, so he always tried to cherish the remaining minutes he had. 

Entering the ship, he saw Cody and Rex in the cockpit, their helmets resting beneath their seats. 

“Cody, Rex, it’s great to see you both again.” he greeted with a warm smile. 

The commander and captain quickly shot out of their seats, their hands immediately turning to a salute. 

“General Kenobi.” they both said at the same time, nodding their heads in acknowledgment. 

“How many times do I have to tell you both that the whole saluting thing isn’t necessary?” he laughed, shaking his head lightly.

“We’re just programmed that way. Sorry, sir.” Rex said with a smile, moving his hands back down, “Everything will be all set to go once General Skywalker and Commander Tano board.”

“They’re running late,” Cody said, agitation evident in his voice. 

“The two of them running late? What a surprise.” 

“I should really start taking their tardiness into account when I set up departure times,” Cody grumbled, turning his attention back to the control panel. 

While Obi-Wan never imagined himself as a general in a war, he grew to care deeply for the clones. Each of them presented themselves differently in the force to him, to the point where he could tell them apart while blindfolded. Cody always felt like a crackling fire, controlled but lethal if needed. Rex reminded him of an oak tree, sturdy but versatile. The Jedi could never understand how other Masters couldn’t tell their clones apart. 

“Snips, it’s not my fault we’re late,” Anakin said as he entered the ship, the togruta in tow, “How could I have planned for Master Sinube to stop me on the way to the hanger to talk?”

“Well maybe if you didn’t wait until the last minute to leave, you would have more leeway for the unexpected.” 

“Young one, it sounds like you’re getting wiser and wiser each day,” Obi-Wan praised, mirth twinkling in his eyes, “She is right you know.” 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

“Generals, are we cleared to take off?” Cody asked, clearly ready to begin the mission, “All the clones have been accounted for and the ship’s manifest has been confirmed.”

“We’re ready when you are, Commander,” Anakin replied. 

While little warning, Cody lurched the ship into drive and the three Jedi watched as the temple grew smaller from the window. 

Ahsoka had left to hang out with the rest of the 501st, leaving Anakin and Obi-Wan alone on the bridge. 

“How’s Padme?” 

“She’s perfectly fine,” Anakin said, rubbing a hand across his neck, “She might have yelled at me for being too overprotective.” 

“Did she?”

“Yea...apparently she explicitly told the chancellor that she didn’t need a Jedi escort and was even more furious when she found out that he had asked the council to use me specifically.” 

Obi-Wan tried to hide the amusement in his eyes, but he knew full well that Anakin could feel it in the force. 

“Well, I’m happy that she feels safe.” 

“She sends her love, by the way,” Anakin said, “She said that once we get home, all of us should have dinner together.” 

For a moment, Obi-Wan let himself imagine it. He saw himself inside Padme’s apartment, sitting at the dining table that rarely had any use. It was filled with food, everything from take-out to something that Padme tried (and failed) to cook. He would sit next to Anakin, freely able to laugh and touch him. Ahsoka would be across from them, fake gagging at their affection. Padme, from the head of the table, would watch it all with her vibrant smile. The image squeezed at his heart. 

“I would love that. When we get back, we’ll have to arrange a time.” 

At this point in the war, the council could not waste their two most lucrative generals on a planet that was barely represented in the Senate. Had the mission occurred on any other Outer Rim planet, the council would not have even considered sending Obi-Wan or Anakin. But Yerbana was different. Located in the middle of various Outer Rim planets, it was the ideal spot for ships to refuel. The Separatist occupation meant that supply ships were unable to refuel, leaving the planets beyond Yerbana without aid. With their people starving and dying, the Republic needed to take the planet, or risk losing dozens of planets to the Separatists. It was a true do or die mission. 

The battalions had left Coruscant in the evening in order to reach the planet by dawn. Cody had mentioned to the Jedi council that most of their attacks seemed to occur mid-afternoon, a fact that the droids were beginning to catch onto. He proposed attacking at daybreak when they would least expect an ambush. Much to Obi-Wan’s surprise, every member of the council agreed to the plan: Leave Coruscant late. Attack at dawn. Leave no droid functional. Leave no Separatist alive. 

_ Sounds easy enough _ , Obi-Wan thought bitterly. 

“Master, you should get some sleep before the mission.” Anakin said, already walking in the direction of the Generals’ quarters, “We’re going to need you at your full strength.” 

Obi-Wan nodded, tailing close behind his partner. 

After changing into pajamas, the pair slipped into bed. The light humming of the ship’s engine was a welcomed change to the sirens and horns of Coruscant. If it weren’t for the uncomfortable cot he was sharing with Anakin, he would almost think that it was a treat. 

“Are you nervous, Obi-Wan?”

“Of course I am. I think it would be foolish not to be.” 

“What if we’re not able to take the planet?” Anakin asked, his finger tracing shapes onto the older Jedi’s chest, “What if we fail?”

“If we give everything that we can, then there’s no way we can fail,” Obi-Wan replied, in a tone that suggested that he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince Anakin. 

“I hope you’re right.” 

His free hand moved to play with Anakin’s curls, his fingers brushing out the strands. Though the room was dark, he stared idly at the ceiling. If they didn’t take the planet, the prospects of winning the war were slim. If they did not take the base, it would only be a matter of time before more and more Republic planets were forced to turn on them. It was a daunting thought, one that Obi-Wan wished he didn’t have to think about. Sighing, he shifted Anakin over, moving to spoon him. He wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him close to his chest. Obi-Wan rested his head on the crook of Anakin’s neck, his lips resting slightly over the skin there. 

“Did you ever think this would happen?” Anakin asked, clearly in the questioning mood. 

“The war or us?”

“Both.”

Obi-Wan laughed, pressing a light kiss to Anakin’s neck and enjoying the way he would feel the shivers it sent down the knight’s body. 

“Qui-Gon often talked about an event that would greatly test the Jedi, so in a way, I was always prepared for some kind of war. Though I never expected the war to be as brutal and devastating as this one.” 

“And what about us?” 

“Never in a million years.” 

“Really?” 

“To this day, I still cannot fathom why you still stick around the pile of damaged parts named Obi-Wan Kenobi.” 

Anakin turned to face Obi-Wan, moving to cup his cheek with his hand. He drew Obi-Wan to him, leading him into a passionate kiss. For a second, the Jedi master forgot that he was currently on a ship, heading towards a battle that could possibly change their lives forever. Instead, all he could feel was Anakin. Force, he wished that he could live in that state forever. Obi-Wan sighed as Anakin pulled away. 

“Damaged parts happen to be my favorite kinds. I love fixing things.”    
Obi-Wan laughed, pressing a kiss to Anakin’s jawline. He tenderly ran a finger along his face, running down the outline of his scar. 

“You mean the galaxy to me, Anakin Skywalker.” 

“I love you too, Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

The next morning, the two dressed in relative silence. They helped each other into their armor, their hands lingering on their skin as they connected each buckle. There was an unsaid tension between them, the threat of failure. The threat of loss. They both knew that the second they opened their chamber door, they would be thrust from the safety of their space and into the unknown. 

“Promise me that you don’t do anything reckless?” Obi-Wan said, hooking Anakin’s lightsaber to his waist. 

“I won’t do anything that exceeds my normal amount of recklessness.” 

Obi-Wan cocked an eyebrow at him, clearly not amused by his answer. 

“Fine. I won’t do anything reckless.” 

“Thank you.” 

Obi-Wan grabbed the front of Anakin’s armor and dragged him down into a kiss. They poured both their hopes and fears into it, knowing the other one could sense it. After pulling away, the pair locked eyes with one another, their hands interlocked. There was an unspoken agreement being said between the two:  _ Come home to me safe _ . 

With one last kiss, they opened the chamber door and prepared for battle. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wonder what's going to happen next :) we're about halfway through the story, y'all!! Thank you so much for sticking around!


	15. Tomorrow Will Come

Since the beginning of the war, Obi-Wan and Anakin had never deviated from their battle strategy. Obi-Wan and the 212th acted as a precise and lethal first wave. Their job was to clear as many of the lower-grade droids as possible, paving a path into the heart of the enemy. Anakin and the 501st would be the final blow, coming in as a strong and decisive punch. The higher-grade droids would be taken care of quickly, as they were already weakened by the first attack. It never took the duo long to overtake a base. While the Jedi council never fully approved of their attack style (tradition always had the padawan going into battle first), they could not argue with their results. 

They never deviated from their battle strategy because it worked. 

Until it didn’t. 

Obi-Wan could not remember seeing such carnage since Geonosis. The ground was stained with oil and blood; he could not tell which the battlefield was more saturated with. Smoke, burning flesh, and the smell of metal were pungent, making his nose wrinkle with every breath. All around him, both clones and droids were falling. It seemed like for every clanker they shot down, three more clones went with it. 

“Cody, your left!” Obi-Wan yelled, his voice already sounded strained. He watched as Cody aimed his blaster at the attack droid, striking it through the chest. 

“Thank you, sir.” 

“Just stay alive, Cody. I’m heading towards the center.” 

Obi-Wan ran into a swarm of droids, swinging his blue saber in front of him. He barely registered where he was striking, as he let the force guide him. All he could focus on was cutting down as many of the machines as possible. He felt a scream erupting from his chest, but he couldn’t even recognize the voice as his own. It sounded so scared, so tired. The Jedi pressed on, slicing the head off an attack droid as it tried to raise a blaster to him. 

Obi-Wan’s heart stopped as he heard a low grumble coming towards the base in front of him. Looking up, he saw at least twenty tanks surging towards them with rows of droids resting on top of them. 

“Anakin!” he screamed into his comm, trying to defend himself, “We need reinforcements, now!”

“What’s going on, Obi-wan?”

“Twenty tanks coming in from the south. They ambushed us from the start.” 

“We’re coming.” 

The comm clicked off and Obi-Wan returned his full focus back to the fight. He hadn’t been on the losing side of a battle in a long time. Here, being surrounded by droids that never seemed to go down, he was failing to grasp onto hope. 

Another attack droid set his sights on him, barreling at him at inhuman speeds. Using the force, Obi-Wan pushed up from the ground, flipping over the machine. He stabbed the droid from the back before it could even turn around. 

_ Thanks for that trick, Qui-Gon. _ He thought, trying to find some form of humor in the situation. Form IV wasn’t his favorite, but it did come in handy sometimes. 

It felt like hours waiting for Anakin and the 501st to show up, but when they did, it was with their usual fanfare. Three gunships came soaring in from the skies, blasters pointed on the opposing side. Through the force, Obi-Wan could feel the relief from his battalion. 

More clones poured onto the battlefield, slicing at the droids with fresh vigor. Their passion helped to ignite the 212th, who were slowly giving in to fatigue and exhaustion. 

“Nice of you to join us.” he heard Cody say to Rex, the two clones fighting off the clankers back-to-back. 

“You know the general, always fashionably late.” 

“Next time, tell him to cut down the make-up routine.” 

Rex laughed, continuing to cut down the droids. 

A loud explosion caught his attention. He looked to see three tanks on fire, the droids on top either jumping off or melting within the flames. To his right, he saw a Waxer and Boil cheering. It seemed as if they threw a few bombs in their direction. 

“Where did they get all these droids?” Anakin asked as he joined Obi-Wan, his blue lightsaber easily hacking through the metal of the droids. 

“It seems like they have an entire arsenal hiding in that base.” he replied, “Where’s Ahsoka?” 

“Right here, Master!” The togruta flipped over a few droids, throwing a set of detonators into enemy lines. They exploded with a loud  _ bang _ , sending spare parts flying into the air. “I wouldn’t miss out on the fun.” 

Her enthusiasm sent a small smile to his lips. It reminded him of his days with Qui-Gon. So eager to help. So eager to make a difference. 

The three continued their way into the center of the chaos, growing frustrated with the number of droids that seemed to be rushing towards them. 

“Masters!” Ahsoka called over the roaring of the fight, “It looks like they’re defending a power cell!” 

“A what?” 

“A power cell! It’s outside of the base. I’m guessing that it controls all of the droids.” 

“Good eye, Snips,” Anakin praised, using his legs to kick a few droids back, “If we destroy the power cell, we’ll have the planet.”

“We need to recoup,” Obi-Wan said, “We can’t rush without a plan.” 

“I agree,” Anakin called back. 

Obi-Wan raised his comm to his mouth, using the force to propel three droids back.

“Cody! Rex! Call the men back. We need to recoup.” 

“Sir, are we retreating?” 

“Yes! Head back to base.” 

“Yes, sir. We’ll send a ship to your coordinates.” 

The three Jedi continued to fight, deciding to cut down as many droids as possible while they waited. Obi-Wan noticed that the droids they were cutting down were not the normal battle droids that they were accustomed to seeing during their sieges. These were advanced models, ones that were normally not a part of the front-line. But the sound of an engine cut him out of his thoughts. They jumped onto the gunship, breathing a sigh of relief as the battlefield grew smaller. 

“What the hell was that?” roared Rex as he walked into the command center to meet with Cody and the Jedi, “I’ve never seen that many clankers in one place.” 

“I have no idea” Cody replied, his face streaked with soot and sweat, “They never fire that many during the first wave.” 

“Someone must be analyzing us,” Ahsoka said, leaning on the table, “We do always strike with the same plan.” 

“That is a dangerous thought, young one. But I believe you to be right.” Obi-Wan replied, stroking his beard. “The question now is how we proceed from here.” 

“We need to take the power cell',” Anakin began, pulling up the map of the battlefield, “From Ahsoka’s recon, we can assume that it’s located in this general area.” He pointed to an empty spot near the opening of the base, “If we can destroy the cell, then the droids will fall. We’ll be able to capture any remaining Separatists and declare the planet to be in Republic control.” 

“And how do you plan to do that, Sir?” Rex asked. 

Anakin shrugged, his shoulders slumping slightly. Silence lapsed the room, every member lost in their own thoughts. They all knew that this mission was not going to be easy. 

“I have an idea,” Ahsoka said, her voice sounding slightly timid, “But I’m not sure if it’ll work.” 

“Let’s hear it, Snips.” 

“What if we switch up our strategy? Me, Anakin, and the 501st will attack first. We’ll clear as much of the first wave as possible. Then we’ll call the rest of you in. As you’re taking care of the second wave of droids, Anakin and I will sneak through and get the power cell.” 

Obi-Wan stroked his beard again, thinking through her idea. It wasn’t perfect, but it would act as a shock factor. The enemy obviously expected a stealth attack as the first one, versus one that was filled with Anakin’s normal explosions. 

It could work and honestly, they had no other option. 

“I think we should do it.” 

“I agree,” nodded Anakin, putting a hand on Ahsoka’s shoulder as a sign of praise, “Great thinking, padawan.” 

“Thank you, Master.” 

The group refocused on the battlefield in front of them, streamlining their plan. They’d attack in the morning again, hoping to keep the element of surprise on their side. After reviewing the plan a few more times, they all broke off. 

They’d all need as much rest as possible for tomorrow. 

“What do you think our chances are?” Anakin said, stripping out of his dirty robes, “Are we crazy for not calling for further back-up from the council?” 

“Anakin Skywalker, asking for help from the council? Are you sure you didn’t hit your head?” Obi-Wan laughed, pressing a small kiss to his cheek. “But no, I don’t think we’re crazy. It was only a matter of time before the Separatists caught onto us anyway.” 

“I suppose you’re right.” 

Obi-Wan began to almost remove his own robes, relieved to finally be able to shower. The dirt of the battle was beginning to settle into his skin, making him feel sticky. 

“I believe in Ahsoka’s plan. She made a fantastic point before.” 

Anakin smiled. “She’s growing up so fast.” 

“Too fast.” Obi-Wan laughed, “Before we know it, she’ll have a padawan of her own.” 

“Obi-Wan, I can barely take her talking about people she finds attractive. I don’t think I can handle the idea of her being knighted right now.” 

“You do realize that her future partners will have to deal with us, right?” 

“They won’t last a second.” 

The pair, finally out of their armor and robes, stepped into the ‘fresher. Another perk of being a general was your own personal bathroom, versus the traditional communal one. They both sighed lightly as the hot water hit their bodies. Beneath them, the water ran brown and red with the remnants of the previous battle. 

“Sex is great and all,” Anakin said, massaging shampoo into his locks, “But I don’t think anything will ever be better than a shower after a rough battle.” 

“Care to elaborate on that?” Obi-Wan said, moving closer to the other man. He gathered a palm-full of soap, moving to lather it across Anakin’s chest. He dragged his hands down his sides, his rough fingertips sending shivers through Anakin. Obi-Wan leaned down to suck at his nipple, biting lightly on the bud. Above him, Anakin moaned, his cock twitching at the sensation. 

“Do you want to repeat your statement?” Obi-Wan asked, a smirk clear on his face. 

“Not unless you’re going to stop.” 

“Don’t plan on it.” 

Obi-Wan brought their lips together, loving the way Anakin leaned into him. As the warm water dripped down them, Obi-Wan felt the force around them swell. He moved his hands down to cup Anakin’s ass, squeezing at the flesh there. Anakin tilted his head back, giving Obi-Wan full access to bite and nip at his throat. 

“ _ Master. _ ” Anakin moaned, already needy. He watched as his former padawan’s hands clenched at his sides, desperate to grab a hold of something. 

“I could look at you like this for years.” Obi-Wan commented, his hand moving down to stroke Anakin’s cock, “So pretty for me.” 

“Just for you,” Anakin replied, grasping ahold of Obi-Wan’s shoulders. His nails leaving half-moon shapes that would surely be there come morning. Obi-Wan increased his speed, twisting his hand slightly as he continued to stroke. Anakin’s moans were some of the most beautiful sounds he’s ever heard. 

Without warning, Anakin flipped Obi-Wan around, pressing the smaller Jedi against the tile wall. He gave a smirk as he dropped to his knees, hands running along Obi-Wan’s legs. 

“Anakin, you don’t have to-” 

He was cut off by Anakin licking a slow stripe along his cock. Anakin looked up, his blue eyes wide and filled with passion. Obi-Wan had to level his breathing in order to keep his composure. 

“But I want to,” he replied, his voice husky. Placing a hand on Obi-Wan’s hips, he took his master fully into his mouth, eyes slightly prickling as he reached the back of his throat. Fully seated, Anakin gave a slight moan, sending vibrations down Obi-Wan’s cock. 

“Fuck, Anakin.” Obi-Wan choked out, his hands tangling in Anakin’s hair. Beneath him, Anakin nodded, giving him consent to guide his head along his cock. Obi-Wan thrusted into his mouth, savoring the warmth of Anakin’s mouth. He pulled at the other man’s curls, his knees buckling as Anakin moaned at the sensation. He thrusted faster, getting lost in the sensation of his former padawan. 

With one final thrust, he pulled Anakin off him. Looking down, his heart stopped at the sight. His blue eyes were dilated, his pupils blown out. His lips were red and swollen, light bruises dancing on his chest. As he stared at Obi-Wan, he looked so in awe. So in love. 

Without hesitation, Obi-Wan pulled him up and into a searing kiss. His hands traveled all over his body, mapping out every inch. He bit down lightly on Anakin’s lips, moaning as his tongue dipped into his mouth. 

“Turn around,” he ordered, leading Anakin to rest his cheek against the wall. He gave a slight smack to Anakin’s ass, marveling at the way the water bounced off of it as he did so. Leaning out of the shower, he grabbed the bottle of bacta that they had used earlier in the day to treat their wounds. 

Anakin moaned at the sound of the bottle being opened behind him. Obi-Wan coated his fingers, warming up the gel in his hands. He ran his hands along Anakin’s ass, drinking in the way goosebumps appeared on his skin. 

“What do you want, Anakin?” he asked, fingers lightly brushing against his rim. 

“ _You_.” Anakin choked, his voice breaking. 

“You need to be a bit more specific,” Obi-Wan said, biting down on his shoulders for emphasis. 

“Please just  _ fuck me _ ”.

Obi-Wan chuckled, moving to slowly push a finger into Anakin. The curly-haired man moaned loudly, moving to bite down on his fist to stifle himself. Obi-Wan used his free hand to gently pull his hand away. 

He leaned down to whisper into Anakin’s ear, his lips brushing against the shell of it. 

“None of that, dear one. I want to hear you moan my name.” To emphasize his point, he roughly pushed another finger in, causing Anakin to brokenly moan again. 

“Obi-Wan,  _ please _ .” 

“You sound so precious” he praised, noting the flush that spread across Anakin’s body, “My name sounds so perfect when you moan it like that.” 

He continued to push two fingers in, curling them slightly. Anakin panted beneath him, his knees shaking with the sensation. Feeling as if he was stretched enough with two fingers, Obi-Wan pressed a third in, angling them up slightly. 

“Oh fuck, right there. More...please.” 

Obi-Wan smiled to himself, continuing to hit that spot inside of Anakin. 

More, please what?” he asked. 

“More, please  _ Master _ ”. 

The older Jedi smacked his ass before thrusting his fingers in again. 

“Good boy, Anakin,” he purred, taking in how Anakin was falling apart beneath him. After he was sure that Anakin was properly stretched, he reached for the bottle of bacta again. He coated his own cock, lining himself up with Anakin. 

“Are you ready?” he asked, kissing down Anakin’s neck and sucking hard on the skin. He didn’t care if he left a mark. They would just pass it off as a battle injury. Anakin nodded beneath him. It was all Obi-Wan needed. 

He thrust in sharply, the pair moaning at the same time. He stilled for a second, allowing Anakin to become accustomed to the stretch. While he waited, he reached down to stroke Anakin’s cock in his hand. 

“You’re so fucking tight,” he said, his voice shaking as he gripped Anakin’s cock harder. “It’s like you were made for me.” 

Anakin gasped, pushing back on Obi-Wan to tell him to move. Obi-Wan laughed at the movement before beginning to thrust into him. 

Paired with the warmth of the water, the moans coming from Anakin, and the pure adrenaline that was leftover from battle, Obi-Wan knew that he wasn’t going to last long. He gripped Anakin’s hips, thrusting into him hard. His pace was fast, the sound of their skin slapping together filling the shower. 

“Master, right there.  _ Please _ .” 

Obi-Wan shifted himself, driving himself roughly into Anakin. He pounded into the man beneath him, making sure that every angle was perfect. Obi-Wan snaked around to grab Anakin’s cock again, feeling how heavy it was in his hands. He stroked it fast to match the way he was pounding into him. 

“Obi-Wan...I’m not goona last.” he panted out, his voice filled with passion. 

Obi-Wan continued to thrust into him, noticing how Anakin moved to brace himself against the tiles. He moved to tangle his hands into Anakin’s curls, pulling harshly. 

“Cum for me, Anakin.” 

A broken moan escaped Anakin’s lips, echoing slightly off of the shower. He came across the tiles, his body supporting himself against the wall. Obi-Wan wrapped a hand around his waist to keep him upright. His own thrusts became erratic and faster, fucking Anakin through his orgasm. 

He felt the familiar tightness forming in his stomach, his brain becoming clouded. His focus was entirely on the man under him. 

“Force,  _ Anakin _ ”, he moaned, spilling into Anakin. Panting, he kissed Anakin’s shoulder before pulling out. 

On shaking legs, Anakin turned around and pulled Obi-Wan into a kiss. 

“I guess you were right about nothing being better than sex.” 

“I try to always be right.” 

They kissed again, both laughing lightly. They finished showering, turning the water off. 

Without the sound of the water filling the ‘fresher, they could hear pounding and a familiar voice at their chamber door. 

“You guys are so gross!” he heard Ahsoka say from the other side, “I thought we had a ‘no PDA when your padawan is around’ deal?” 

The pair burst into laughs, doubling over. Tears gathered at the corner of Obi-Wan’s eyes, the embarrassment of the situation not fully sinking in yet. 

“I wouldn’t count this as public,” Anakin yelled back, laughter still in his voice. 

“I’m traumatized now, I hope you’re happy.” 

“Sorry, young one,” Obi-Wan called out, smiling at Anakin. 

“Yeah. Yeah. I brought you both dinner since you missed it. I’m just going to leave it here, you weirdos.” 

“Thanks, Snips!” 

“You owe me!” they heard her say, her voice fading, signaling that she was walking away. 

“Either we have to buy her an appointment with a mind healer or a new commlink,” Obi-Wan said.

“I think she’d get more use out of the commlink.” 

“I agree.” 

The pair laughed, leaning in to kiss one another. It was moments like these where Obi-Wan thought about life outside of the war. A life wherein a few short hours, they wouldn’t be back on the battlefield. A life where it could be him, Anakin, and Ahsoka, living as what he would call a family. 

_ Maybe one day _ , he allowed himself to think. Knowing that in reality, it could never happen. But what was a life without hope, anyway?

“We should eat,” Anakin said, his stomach rumbling, “We haven’t had anything since this morning.” 

Noticing his own hunger, he agreed. 

Obi-Wan knew that tomorrow was going to come, no matter what. He figured that he might as well enjoy these few hours alone with Anakin. Suddenly overwhelmed with a wave of affection for his partner, he pulled Anakin in for a kiss, surprising him. It was a gentle one, a kiss that only lovers shared. As he pulled away, he moved a thumb to trace at Anakin’s cheekbones. 

“What was that for?” Anakin asked. 

“I-I…” Obi-Wan stopped himself. He wanted to say the words, the words that Anakin was able to say so freely, so openly. But he couldn’t. They caught in his throat like barbs, failing to crawl their way up. He knew that Anakin understood his feelings for him. But he just couldn’t bring himself to say those three words, at least not yet. 

“I...I was just going to say that you did a great job today, during the battle,” Obi-Wan replied, his eyes casting downward. There was a hint of shame to his voice. 

“Hey,” Anakin said, tilting Obi-Wan’s chin so their eyes met, “I love you too.” 

Obi-Wan smiled, burying his head in Anakin’s chest. 

_ Tomorrow will come _ , he thought,  _ But I will always have Anakin.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter so far for....reasons...next chapter will be up ASAP!


	16. Second Confession

Obi-Wan watched the battle unfold from his gunship. From his height, the clones looked like the dolls he would play with in the creche as a youngling. Except the brave men currently charging towards rows of droids had hopes, fears, and beating hearts. His dolls never actually got hurt. His dolls never watched their brothers die in their arms. Obi-Wan could not bear to think about the number of men they lost in the violence yesterday. But he knew that everyone fighting today was carrying their memories with them. 

They had to win. For the men they lost. For everyone. 

He watched as the 501st ripped through the first layer of droids. The Separatists had used the same strategy as the previous day, sending their heaviest hitters out first. His heart squeezed with pride knowing that Ahsoka was right all along. Without the element of surprise to aid them, the Separatists were falling quickly. Close to the front of the attack, he could faintly see Anakin and Ahsoka’s lightsabers swirling in a storm of blue and green. Obi-Wan wondered if the two of them were still tracking how many clankers they cut down. 

He watched as four detonators exploded, each taking out a tank with them. That was the signal that they had agreed on. It was time to finish this battle. 

“Ready men?” Obi-Wan asked. 

“Yes, sir.” was the echoed response from his battalion. 

Cody gave the command to charge and the 212th jumped from the gunships and into the battlefield below. While Obi-Wan would never admit it to Anakin, he could understand why he enjoyed acting as the second wave. It reminded him of the reckless spirit he harbored in the years when Anakin was still just a youngling. As the wind whipped around him, Obi-Wan felt ten years younger. He smiled to himself, a wild grin. Nothing was going to stop him. 

With the aid of the force, he landed with a soft  _ thud  _ into the center of a few spider droids. It took him less than five minutes to slice through every single one. The sizzling sound of his saber melting through the metal was music to his ears. They crackled and fizzed as they fell. 

“You’re goona have to show the general that one,” Rex said next to him, ripping the head of a battle droid straight from his socket. 

“I think Anakin has enough dramatic moves in his arsenal.” 

“You’re right about that, sir.” 

The two shared a laugh, neither of them deviating from dismantling the droids in front of them. There was no “correct” way to finish off a droid. As long as it couldn’t move any longer, then the job was done. Each clone and Jedi had their own way of doing it. 

Obi-Wan reached out in the force, searching for Anakin and Ahsoka. Getting a hit, he leaped in the air, heading closer towards the base in front of them. As he landed, he cut down a few more droids. Having a sense of satisfaction as they dropped to the floor. The sooner he never had to see another machine again, the better. 

“Master, did you see that? Five in one shot!” Ahsoka yelled, running her saber across a line of battle droids who were frazzled by her attack. 

“Don’t get too cocky now, Snips.” 

“You’re just jealous.” 

Obi-Wan joined them, deflecting a few blaster bolts from singeing the tips of Anakin’s armor. The knight nodded in thanks, using the force to send a few droids flying into the air. He crushed his fists, crumbling the machines and throwing the remains at the droids still left of the field. Another loud blast told the generals that another tank was taken out, the smell of smoke filling the battlefield. In the distance, he heard a few clones yell. He hoped it was out of triumph and not something else. The Republic forces continued to fight, striking as many droids down as they could. 

“Masters! Look!” Ahsoka yelled, pointing to a cloud of dust that was coming from the base. Obi-Wan groaned, his heart falling into his stomach. For a second, he believed that they actually might have had the upper hand. He gritted his teeth as a wave of destroyers began their descent onto the battlefield. From a quick glance, Obi-Wan estimated that close to one hundred were heading towards them. He yelled into his comm, giving Cody a warning on the oncoming attack. 

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin said, moving to fight back-to-back with him, “I think I can reach the power cell.” 

“Are you insane?” 

“If you and Ahsoka cover me, I think the three of us can make a path.” 

Obi-Wan wanted to argue, but he heard the distinct march of the destroyers ebbing closer. With only three Jedi, facing that many of them, even with the clones, would be a losing battle. 

“Be safe, dear one.” 

“I will.” 

Anakin called out to Ahsoka, telling her to follow Obi-Wan’s lead. She nodded and joined her grandmaster. The pair slashed at the droids in front of them, not caring if they fully deactivated them or not. Their purpose was to get as much as a carnage out of the way as possible, allowing Anakin to both slip through and preserve his strength. 

They swung their sabers, feeling like the wave of machines would never end. Both worked as fast as possible, the marching of the destroyers acting as an eerie countdown. As they cut down yet another layer, they could see the power cell in the distance. Glowing a sickening purple, the force seemed to pulse around it. The square box seemed to be shield by some type of generator, the covering spitting out crackles of lightning. As menacing as the power cell looked, it was the key to winning Yerbana and possibly the war itself. 

“Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, I’m going for it,” he called, starting off into a run. He leaped through the air, clearing a few feet before landing right in front of the glowing box. 

The destroyers were dangerously close, Obi-Wan could practically feel the ground vibrating with their movements. The droids around them were becoming faster, more violent. Ahsoka joined him at his side, her dual blades slicing at anything that came in front of her. From ahead, he saw the knight raise his blue saber, the glow of the power cell making it shine brighter in the light. 

Anakin gave a yell, stabbing his saber through the shield. The power cell exploded in a deafening crash. A shock wave erupted from the center, spreading out like a deadly wave. Obi-Wan barely had time to scream Anakin’s name before throwing himself on top of Ahsoka, doing anything he could to shield her from the blast. 

His vision went white. And then black. 

The ringing in Obi-Wan’s ears was maddening. It was the only thing that he could focus on. Refusing to open his eyes, he breathed in deeply. He felt two... _ no three _ ...broken ribs. A slicing pain in his ankle told him that the bone was at best broken, and at worst, shattered. His back was tight and throbbing, his body shivering at the sensation. The blast must have burned him. He tasted blood in his mouth, not knowing where the injury was coming from. The world around him span. 

He felt a rough shove to his shoulders, rattling him. 

“Master...Master...Obi-Wan... _ please wake-up. _ ” a voice cried, their shaking unrelenting. Obi-Wan felt two droplets on his face, telling him that the figure was crying. With a groan, he opened his eyes, the light of the planet causing his vision to dance with spots. 

“Thank force you’re alive,” Ahsoka breathed, her face streaked with tears and soot. Around them laid thousands of decommissioned droids, some of their parts still sparking. 

“Where’s Anakin?” he asked, not moving from the ground. 

He watched as Ahsoka froze above him, fresh tears gathering in her big blue eyes, spilling down her cheeks. She shook her head, pointing towards the power cell. 

Obi-Wan shifted his head, looking to see Anakin laying on the ground, his saber still clutched in his hand. 

_ No. He can’t be. _

Pure panic ran through his bloodstream. The ringing in his ears returned, his breathing coming out in only short puffs. He ignored the screams of his body as he pulled himself from the ground. The pain that radiated from his foot and chest had nothing on the pain that was ripping its way through his heart. He collapsed on the ground next to Anakin, gathering his body to his chest.

“Anakin...Anakin, open your eyes. Please, dear one. Look at me.” he practically sobbed, resisting the urge to shake the other man. He felt so limp, so fragile in his arms. 

“Obi-Wan…” he coughed, blood spilling from his mouth. He heard Ahsoka gasp from a few feet away, she frantically called into her comm for help. But Obi-Wan barely acknowledged her. 

“I’m right here, Ani. I’m right here.” he soothed, tracing his finger down Anakin’s cheek, caked in blood and oil. “You’re going to be alright. I promise you.” 

Anakin shook his head, his fists balling at his sides. 

“Train ‘Sokka...please,” Anakin gasped, his chest seizing, “She needs you.” 

“I need you!” Obi-Wan cried, pulling Anakin tighter. Suddenly, it wasn’t just Anakin in his arms. It was Qui-Gon. It was Satine. He felt all of their blood on his hands, soaking them. He was going to lose Anakin. He wasn’t strong enough,  _ again _ . His vision was clouded with tears and a scream ripped its way from his chest. 

“Please stay with me, Anakin. You won’t die here. You can’t die here.” 

“Obi-Wan… I can hear her.” 

“Who?” 

“My mother...she says that...I’m happy with you.” 

“Keep your eyes open, dear one. Stay with me _ please _ .” The last word was cut off by a broken sob. He didn’t care that Ahsoka was a few feet away, her own sobs mixing in with his own. He didn’t care that his clones were going to see him like this. Nothing mattered. Not unless Anakin was going to be okay. 

“I feel so warm.” Anakin gave a weak smile, turning to bury his face in Obi-Wan’s chest. All Obi-Wan could do was bawl, a chorus of “no” escaping his lips. His mind was buzzing, his bloodstream filled with fire. 

Ahsoka ran over, dropping down next to him. She gathered one of Anakin’s hands in her own, gripping tight. 

“Hey, Snips.” 

“Anakin…I-” 

“None of that,” he said another coughing fit overtaking his body, “You’ll be okay. I promise.”

“Master, I can’t do this without you.” 

Anakin gripped her hand back with as much strength as he could muster. 

“You can...You will.” 

Ahsoka, not able to take the sight of her dying master, quickly rose from the floor. She was shaking her head furiously, not ready to accept the fate in front of her. 

“I’m going to see where Rex and Cody are...They’ll be here soon with a medship and a medic and...and..you’re going to be okay.” She took off in a run, screaming louder in her comm for them to  _ hurry up...please...we're losing him.  _

“Obi-Wan” he gasped, pulling at his robes, “My padawan braid...why did you keep it?” 

Fresh tears spilled from Obi-Wan’s eyes, falling onto Anakin’s face. He remembered that night, more than a year had passed since Anakin found him hungover in his quarters. Obi-Wan could feel the stale alcohol on his tongue, the hot shame of his padawan finding him with tears dried on his cheeks. But he then remembered the events after. How he found himself falling for the man, falling harder than he ever had before. He balled his fists into Anakin’s robes, trying to steady himself. 

“I kept it to remind myself that you always deserve better. You deserve everything.” 

Anakin motioned weakly for Obi-Wan to lean down, the act of speaking becoming too tiresome. 

“You’ve already given me everything,” he whispered in his ear. 

Obi-Wan sobbed again, clutching his lover closer to him. He felt him in his arms, cradled him like the precious being he was. 

“We were supposed to send the rest of our lives together” Obi-Wan babbled, his sobs breaking up his words, “I promised that you would see every planet with me. Every star. I would give you everything because you are my galaxy.” 

Obi-Wan paused, the lump in his throat becoming too unbearable. He had been in this situation before, felt this pain before. But never this intense, never this striking. Every time he thought of Qui-Gon, of Satine, he would always hate himself for not being stronger. Not being braver. He sucked in a breath, ignoring the searing pain in his lungs. 

“I love you, Anakin Skywalker.” 

Anakin smiled, a tear sliding down his own cheek. He was too weak to say it back, but Obi-Wan could see the way his lips moved to mimic the sounds. 

Another sob wracked through him and he screamed Anakin’s name. He crushed him against his chest, savoring every time he heard Anakin take a sharp inhale. Obi-Wan cried into his hair, not wanting the sound of Anakin’s ragged breathing to ever stop. 

It felt like hours before he heard the roaring of an engine. A med ship landed a few feet next to him, an entire medical crew pouring out. 

“Get the general!” Rex yelled over the sound of the ship. Obi-Wan didn’t need to be a Jedi to feel the worry in his voice. 

A team of medical clones and two droids ran over to them, a stretcher not far behind. 

“I need you to step away from General Skywalker,” he heard Cody say, trying to get Anakin from his arms. Obi-Wan was frozen in place, his eyes locked on Anakin. “General? General?  _ Obi-Wan! _ ” Cody repeated, his voice clipped. 

Obi-Wan looked up, knowing that tear tracks lined his face. He wordlessly loosened his grip, moving to help load Anakin onto the stretcher. Obi-Wan felt no pain. Just a sense of overwhelming numbness. The only sound was the incessant beating of his own heart. The team brought Anakin inside the ship, yelling and screaming medical codes and procedures. Obi-Wan stood outside, watching silently. He knew that this wasn’t fitting of a Jedi. But he’d gladly hand Master Yoda his lightsaber if it meant that Anakin would live. 

He felt Ahsoka stand next to him. She placed her head on his shoulder, crying softly. Obi-Wan, more than anyone, knew her pain. He gathered her in his arms, squeezing her as tight as he could. She sobbed into his chest, her voice high and panicky. Obi-Wan said nothing, just rubbed circles into her back, ignoring the tears that were coming out of his own eyes. 

The sky was beginning to turn dark before Cody came to get them. 

Obi-Wan looked up, his eyes swollen. His body throbbing. 

“Is he…?”

Cody shook his head and Obi-Wan fell to his knees. The relief that flooded his body was unlike anything he felt before. His breath came out in short bursts, unable to control them. Ahsoka began to cry again, her fears draining from the force. Obi-Wan sniffled and rose from the ground. 

“He is not out of hyperspace yet. He’ll have a rough road to Coruscant, and a rougher recovery.” 

Obi-Wan briefly reminded himself to buy Cody a bottle of Corellian whiskey when they got home. He never loved the man more for speaking so plainly. 

“Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan said, placing a hand on her shoulder, “Go back to Coruscant with Anakin. Make sure he gets to Vokara Che immediately.” 

“Don’t you want to go with him?” 

Obi-Wan gave a sigh. He wanted to. He wanted to hold Anakin’s hand the entire way back, whispering sweet nothings and lullabies in his ears. But all the clones saw him with Anakin. They saw the raw emotion that poured from him, something the clones were taught that the Jedi couldn’t do. For the sake of him and Anakin, he knew that traveling home was not an option. He just hoped that Anakin would forgive him. 

“I can’t,” was all that Obi-Wan replied, hoping that she would understand. By the widening of her eyes and her curt nod, Obi-Wan guessed that she got his point. She really was a brilliant girl. 

“I understand, Obi-Wan.” 

“Promise to update me?” 

“I’ll send hourly ones.” 

He pulled her to his chest in a show of thanks. He placed a kiss on the top of her head. 

“You are strong, young one.” 

She gave a watery smile and boarded the ship with Anakin. 

Obi-Wan was left in a field of broken droids. Cody and Rex had two speeders to take them back to base. He went to join the other two men and immediately collapsed on the ground. Obi-Wan heard a sickening  _ crack _ that he knew meant that his ankle was finally shattering. Diving into a coughing fit, he spat blood onto the field. 

“Forgot about the whole injury thing.” he tried to joke, curling lightly in on himself. Cody didn’t say a word as he hauled his general onto the back of his speeder. Obi-Wan leaned close to Cody, smelling the burnt remains of the battle on his armor. 

As they traveled back, he heard his comm blinking on his wrist. He looked at the flashing light. The council was trying to reach him. 

“Fuck the sith-damned council,” he whispered, throwing his comm to the ground. 

He thought he heard Cody give a laugh. 

And then his vision went blank. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry <3


	17. Clearing The Dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you all so much for continuing to read and your words of support and encouragement <3

During missions, Obi-Wan had grown accustomed to waking up next to Anakin. He’d always run his fingers through his curls, gently coaxing his lover out of sleep. Anakin, who was never one for mornings, would always grumble and shove his face further into Obi-Wan’s chest. It was a few minutes of serenity. 

Now, in the sterile embrace of the ship’s infirmary, all Obi-Wan felt was a cold emptiness. 

Breathing a sigh, he remembered his injuries. Judging by the bandages that were laced around his ribcage and the makeshift cast on his ankle, he figured that the doctor must have tried to patch him up as much as possible. He was just thankful that they didn’t throw him in bacta. 

“Happy to see you’re awake, sir,” Cody said as he entered the room, carrying a cup of water and a pile of pills. Knowing that it was easier to take the medicine than argue, Obi-Wan swallowed the pills without contest. 

“How long was I out for?” 

“A couple of hours. We’ll be arriving on Coruscant in approximately 2 hours and 38 minutes.” 

“I was out that long?” Obi-Wan asked, shock creeping into his voice. Especially on missions, he tried to minimize his downtime to an hour, maybe three at most. He’s worked through the ending stages of battles with a broken collarbone before. 

“You needed sleep, sir. Captain Rex and I made the executive decision to let you sleep.”

“And by executive decision, what do you mean exactly?” 

Cody gave a smirk, meeting Obi-Wan’s eyes. 

“A little sedative never hurts anyone, sir. I still remember when you did the same to me after Felucia.” 

“Then I consider us even.” 

The Jedi and clone shared a smile. The pair were textbook definitions of the word “workaholic” and they both knew it. 

“I brought you a new comm, sir. Commander Tano and the council have been trying to reach you. But I’ve been intercepting until you awoke.” 

“I appreciate it. Thank you, Cody.” 

He nodded in response, handing the blinking comm over to him. Obi-Wan was already dreading the conversation with the council. 

“Is there anything else you need?” Cody asked.

“That’ll be all.”

The clone saluted and turned to leave the room. But Obi-Wan stopped him. 

“Cody, when this is all over. Remind me to buy you a drink.” 

“Sir, with all due respect, I think you owe me more than a single drink.” 

Obi-Wan burst into laughter, the force of it stinging his ribs. He instantly felt lighter, calmer. He wasn’t sure if it was the painkillers or the fact that Cody just seemed to pour out an aura of security. 

“I’ll remember that.” 

Cody smiled and left the room, reminding him that they’d arrive before dinner. 

Obi-Wan tossed the comm in his hands, wondering if he should even bother answering. He wanted to call Ahsoka immediately, but he was afraid of the answer on the other line. If Anakin hadn’t made it, Cody would have told him when he walked in... _ right _ ? He chewed on the inside of his cheek. In his mind, Anakin was alive. Injured beyond belief, but alive. He was terrified of breaking that delusion. He continued to play with the comm, weighing out the pros and cons of calling her. 

He figured that it was best to call now, in case anything went wrong. Obi-Wan figured that he could collect himself by the time he reached the temple. He feared releasing his emotions in front of the council. He sighed, pressing the button to reach his grand-padawan. Almost immediately, she picked up. 

“Master Kenobi! You’re alright!” she said, her face breaking out into a smile, “I’m so happy Cody got you to sleep in.” 

“Cody gave me a sedative.” 

“Smart, man.” 

Silence briefly lapsed between them. Obi-Wan wanted to ask the question, but it stopped on his lips. 

“He’s...stable.” Ahsoka said, sensing the other Jedi’s apprehension, “Master Che is working with him at the moment.” 

“Any updates on his condition?”   
“The good news is that he’ll eventually make a full recovery. But no one can tell how long that will be.” 

Obi-Wan released the breath that he wasn’t even aware that he was holding. 

“There’s something else,” Ahsoka said, her eyes slightly filling with tears. “It’s probably nothing but something Master Che said just isn’t sitting right with me.”

“Tell me, young one.” 

Ahsoka drew in a breath, from the corners of the holo, he would see her balling her fists slightly at her sides. 

“When she was explaining Anakin’s condition to me, she said that if anyone else had attempted to cut the power cell, they’d be dead.”

“What do you mean?” 

“Anakin was hit by a wave of electricity when he stabbed the block. According to Master Che, his prosthetic arm absorbed the worst of the blast. If you or I had tried, she said that it would have stopped our hearts instantly.” 

“The force works in odd ways, Ahsoka. We have to remember that.” 

“Well that’s the thing,” she said, he could hear the exasperation rising in her voice. “If we had stuck to the original plan, you would have been the one to strike it. Me and Anakin would have come in and provided back-up while you charged forward.” 

Obi-Wan stroked his beard, considering what the padawan was saying. 

“Are you saying that someone wants me dead?”

“I’m saying that someone knew our battle strategy enough to know that you would reach the power cell first.” 

“You are very perceptive, Ahsoka. I will have to talk with the council about this.” 

She nodded and Obi-Wan could see the dark circles under her eyes, even if her figure was tinted blue. 

“Have you gotten to see the med team, young one? Have you gotten any sleep?”

“Well...I...When we got to the temple, I…” she trailed off, trying and failing to come up with a lie. 

“You have done so well. Go make sure that you don’t have any injuries that are pressing and please get some rest. I’ll be back at the temple soon.” 

“Okay, Master.” 

Obi-Wan smiled and disconnected the call. He stroked his beard again, thinking over the comment that Ahsoka made. 

_ If anyone else had attempted to cut the power cell, they’d be dead. _

The fact that the Separatists had known their battle strategy from the beginning was a red flag. But something nagged at Obi-Wan. The Separatists were smart, but Obi-Wan did not think that they were  _ this  _ smart. Did they really create this elaborate plot just to kill him? Or was this just a plot to kill any Jedi that attempted to cut the power cell? The overload of information was creating a headache, but his mind continued to surge forward. 

_ Might as well call the council _ , he thought,  _ No point in waiting _ . 

He was greeted by Plo Koon. 

“Master Kenobi, it is good to hear from you.” Master Koon said warmly, “How are your injuries?” 

“A few broken ribs, a broken ankle, and some burns on my back. Nothing that I haven’t seen before.” Obi-Wan tried to muster a smile. 

He was thankful that Plo answered the call. There was something oddly comforting about the Jedi. Even when he was a padawan himself, he always felt soothed around him. 

“Little ‘Soka debriefed the council when she arrived, though we would like to hear your account as well.” 

“I have a few points that I would like to bring up to the council. This mission has brought light to many concerning elements.” 

“Would you rather we wait until tomorrow to call the meeting? To allow you to rest?” 

Obi-Wan’s heart panged briefly. Only Master Koon would be kind enough to offer such a thing. Had Master Windu answered, Obi-Wan was certain that they’d have the meeting right then and there. 

“I appreciate the offer. But I’d like to recall the events while they are fresh in my mind.”

Plo Koon nodded, clasping his hands behind his back. 

“Very well. Ahsoka has also offered to complete the paperwork for the mission while you and Knight Skywalker recover.” 

Obi-Wan could have burst into tears. He didn’t deserve such a good padawan. 

“I’ll have to thank her when I see her.” 

The pair exchanged goodbyes, clicking the commlinks off. Obi-Wan glanced at the clock on the wall, seeing that they would be landing very soon. He figured that now would be a good time as ever to attempt to walk. 

Swinging his legs off the bed, he felt how stiff and dry his back was. It was a sign that the burns were healing, but it didn’t mean that it was any less painful. He sucked in a breath as he applied pressure to his ankle, the cast doing little to absorb the impact. Breathing his pain into the force, he eyed the pair of crutches on the opposite side of the room. He knew that Cody placed them just out of reach in order to try and keep him contained. 

It was an admirable attempt. 

After many curses and lots of hobbling, he reached the crutches. The pain that was coursing through his body was borderline unbearable, but it helped to keep him focused. He needed to speak with the council and more than that, he needed to see Anakin. 

Centering himself with the force once again, he left the room and walked to the bridge to prepare for landing and his meeting with the council. 

“Interesting, this is.” Master Yoda said after Obi-Wan had finished recalling the events of the battle. “Proud of Ahsoka, you must be.” 

“She did an exceptional job during this mission. She is growing into a very capable Jedi.” 

A murmur of agreement came from the council. Obi-Wan sat in front of them, a chair being brought in on the account of his ankle. If he had to stand for the duration of the meeting, he was certain that he would have passed out at some point. 

“I don’t like the idea of the Separatists being so familiar with you and Skywalker’s battle strategy,” Mace said, leaning forward to rest his hands on his thighs. 

“I agree. But how did they know Obi-Wan and Anakin were being sent in the first place?” asked Master Ti, “We could have sent any Jedi in their place.” 

A feeling of dread settled in Obi-Wan’s gut. 

“Are you suggesting what I think you are?” he asked. 

“All signs that I can see point to a traitor in our midst.” 

Obi-Wan could feel a wave of anxiety bleed into the force. He watched as all the masters shifted slightly in their seats, all uncomfortable by the thought of a leak. 

“Master Ti is right,” Mace said, “The attack from the droids was obviously pre-planned. They must have been tipped off about the pair of you coming.” 

“A target on your back, you have.” Yoda said, his ears twitching slightly, “Careful, you must be.” 

“Master Yoda, in all due respect, every Jedi in this room has a target on their back. It does not explain why I was targeted specifically, and not Anakin or Ahsoka.” 

“True, this is. Meditate on this, I must.” 

Obi-Wan nodded a feeling of foreboding coursing through the council. This was not the first time someone has tried to kill him. It was practically a part of the job. But never had an attempt on his life been so meticulously planned and bloody. 

“Let us be grateful in this moment,” Master Koon said, his voice breaking the thick silence that had permeated the room, “The force has returned all three Jedi to us, as well as allowed us to retake the planet. We will figure this mystery out, but for now, we shall thank the force.” 

Obi-Wan smiled, nodding at the Kel Dor. He was right. They had claimed the base for the Republic. It was the breaking point that many of them had been waiting for. 

“With you, the force has been,” Yoda smiled, crossing his hands in front of him, “With you, it will continue to be.” 

The meeting was dismissed, the masters filing out of the room. Obi-Wan limped behind them, his crutches echoing on the sleek floors of the temple. 

The temple was huge, Obi-Wan knew this. But with the state of his ankle, the walk to the medical wing seemed even longer. He knew that he should be resting his foot, if he wanted it to recover quickly. But seeing Anakin was his first priority. 

Entering the room, he had to grip his crutches in order to prevent himself from falling over. Anakin looked so frail, dwarfed by the machinery around him. Tubes and wires were placed over his broad chest, thin white scars were littered on his body; the leftovers from the shock of the blast. His prosthetic hand was placed on the table next to him, the metal charred and slightly melted. Obi-Wan gave a small laugh, despite himself. Ahsoka must have told Master Che to save the hand. Even though everyone knew the arm would never work again, Anakin would still want to fiddle with it anyway. 

Using the force to drag over a chair, Obi-Wan sat next to his bed. He closed his eyes, reaching out into the force. He could feel Anakin there, a whisper of his normal force signature. But it was a comfort knowing that he could still feel his lover at all. 

He placed his hand on top of Anakin’s, noting how stiff and cold his hands were. 

“The council had great things to say about Ahsoka today,” Obi-Wan said, “You would have been so proud of her.” He paused, almost anticipating a reply. But Anakin laid lifeless in the bed before him. The monitors attached to him continued to beep and whirl, making him seem more droid than human. 

“I don’t know if you can hear me, but everything will be okay.” He wasn’t sure who he was saying it more too, himself or Anakin. “There’s nothing that we can’t do, remember?”. 

Obi-Wan squeezed Anakin’s hand slightly, ignoring the single tear that rolled down his cheek. Anakin was going to be okay. It was not a matter of if, but when. But the question of when haunted him. 

“When you wake up, we’ll plan something for the two of us, okay? There’s no way the council won’t grant you a retreat. We can visit Naboo or some other warm planet. Just the two of us. How does that sound?” 

He knew that Anakin wouldn’t answer. But he knew that Anakin would have replied with something along the lines of “anywhere without sand”. His heart ached, but he was trying to remain grateful that he still had Anakin in front of him. 

“Master Kenobi, I expected you to be in a meeting with the council still.” He heard a voice say as the figure entered the room. Obi-Wan hastily wiped his eyes, hoping that they weren’t too red. 

“The meeting went faster than expected, Chancellor.” he replied, moving his hand slightly away from Anakin’s, “I came to check on Anakin’s progress.” 

“I am here for the same reason.”

Obi-Wan watched as Palpatine moved to the opposite side of the bed. Dressed in a flowing maroon robe, the chancellor placed a hand on Anakin’s shoulder. Obi-Wan swallowed the jealousy that rose in his throat. 

“Pity about his hand,” Palpatine said, eyeing the mangled collection of parts on the table, “Are the Jedi able to construct him a new one?” 

“They provided him with one before. I am certain that they will again.”

“Well, should they run into any issues, I will be more than willing to commission the making of a new one.” 

Obi-Wan smiled in thanks, willing himself to ignore the slimy feeling that was twisting his way through his gut. The chancellor was just trying to help. 

“Has the healer given any estimates on when he might wake?”

“Unfortunately, no. We will just have to wait and see.” 

Palpatine nodded, squeezing Anakin’s shoulder lightly. 

“Hopefully our young friend here will awake soon. The Republic greatly misses the Hero Without Fear already.”

“Anakin is strong. He will pull through.”

“I have no doubts about his power.” 

Both men stared down at Anakin’s body. The room was filled with the whirring of the machines. The light that was Anakin Skywalker was dimmed and it felt wrong to everyone. Palpatine gave a final pat to Anakin’s shoulder. 

“Please keep me informed on his progress.” 

“I will. Goodnight Chancellor.” 

Palpatine gave a nod and exited the room without another word. 


	18. Cracked Teacups

“He wouldn’t like this,” Padme said one evening as Obi-Wan escorted the senator back to her apartment. “He would hate to see you like this.”

Obi-Wan knew exactly what she meant. It had been weeks since he had come back from Yerbana and Anakin still had not shown any signs of waking. Obi-Wan had spent hours in the Halls of Healing trying to rouse his lover. He tried singing to him, reading updates from his favorite podracers, and linking their fingers together in a way that felt so natural that it tore at Obi-Wan’s heart. In one instance, he even snuck a kiss to his lips in an attempt to wake him like he saw in a cheesy holo once. 

Master Che promised that it was normal. But Obi-Wan saw nothing normal about the situation. Anakin was a man that was constantly filled with energy, so much so that Obi-Wan swore that he could sometimes feel his atoms vibrating. The gray, still body that was claiming to be Anakin was a poor imposter of the man he loved. 

He stopped taking care of his injuries, his already severe burns and broken bones were taking even longer to heal. Dex had even begun sending deliveries to the apartment when Obi-Wan stopped ordering. It was the only way that he would remember to eat. Sleep was a joke. Anakin’s robes and pillows stopped smelling of him, making his already empty apartment seem even more vacant. 

The bags under his eyes were heavy and dark. Padme was right. Anakin would hate to see him like this. 

“Well good thing he’s asleep.” 

“I can assure you that he wouldn’t approve of that answer.” 

“I can assure you that he would have given you the same answer if the roles were reversed.” 

Padme huffed, rolling her eyes slightly. 

“Will you least join me for tea tonight?”

“It’s already late. I shouldn’t be returning late to the temple anyway.” 

“When has that stopped you before?” 

“Padme-” Obi-Wan began before he was cut off by the senator. Stopping in the middle of the hallway, she pointed a manicured finger into his chest. 

“You will stay for tea tonight and you will not leave my apartment until you’ve slept at least eight hours.” 

“Do I have much of a choice?”

Padme shot him a wicked grin, linking her arms with his as they walked towards the speeder. 

“Absolutely not.” 

Living in the temple made Obi-Wan forget how lavish some people’s spaces can be. He was used to a few spare decorations, a couch, and a bed that was just big enough to fit himself and Anakin. Padme’s living room was currently larger than his entire apartment and filled with more trinkets than he’s owned in his entire life. 

He’d be lying if he said that the plush, velvet couch was not the most comfortable surface he’s slept on in months. The Jedi idly wondered if he could somehow sneak an equally comfortable bed into the apartment. 

Obi-Wan took a sip of the teacup in front of him, admiring the delicate details of the porcelain. 

“Did you really slip brandy in here?” 

Padme smiled from behind her glass, taking a drink of her own tea.

“It seemed like you could use it.” 

“I can’t argue with that.” 

Padme always seemed to know what everyone needed, at any point in time. She was so intuned with those around her that Obi-Wan often wondered if she was slightly force-sensitive herself. He figured that it was the reason that she was such a successful senator. Even if she didn’t meet them, Padme knew what her people needed. 

Setting down her teacup, Padme moved to put a hand on top of Obi-Wan’s. 

“I know that things are hard right now. But you can’t keep living like this.” 

Obi-Wan sighed, closing his eyes slightly. He could already feel a headache coming on. 

“I’m not asking you to act like Anakin is sitting right next to you. I’m asking that you start taking care of yourself. I’m worried. Ahsoka’s worried. _ Kriff _ , even Bail mentioned something to me.” 

“Bail?” 

“Yes, he asked if you were okay after he caught you sleeping during Orn Free Taa’s speech last week.” 

Obi-Wan slightly blushed at the memory. 

“I was hardly the only one asleep during it.” 

“When was the last time that you ever fell asleep during a meeting?” 

“Not often.” 

“Exactly.” 

Padme squeezed his hand, rubbing her thumb lightly in an attempt to soothe him. 

“How can I help, Obi-Wan? I want to help you.” 

“Unless you can wake Anakin up, I don’t think there’s much that you can do.” 

The senator sighed. 

“You are aware that I’m going to make sure that you’re eating and sleeping enough, right? Even if it kills the both of us.” 

Obi-Wan squeezed her hand back, giving her a slight smile. If he wasn’t able to function for himself or even for Anakin, then he would have to do it for Padme. She had enough on her plate to worry about. Having to fret over a wayward Jedi master with a secret, injured lover was not something she needed on her list. 

“I’ll try my best.” 

“Perfect!” she said, her tone suddenly lightening. Moving from the couch, she reached into a nearby closet and emerged with pillows and the fluffiest blanket that Obi-Wan had ever seen in his entire life. “I know that you’re going to refuse my bed or any of the beds in my apartment. So you’re going to sleep on this couch and I better not see you awake before sunrise.” 

“You’re serious about this aren’t you?” 

“Very.” 

Resigned to his fate, Obi-Wan accepted the blanket and settled down on the couch. Feeling the soft fabric, he couldn’t help but start to feel his eyelids start to droop. He could barely remember the last time he slept more than four hours. Maybe he did need this. 

“Padme?” he called, stifling a yawn.

“Yes?” 

“Thank you.” 

“I can’t have my best friend’s boyfriend collapsing while he’s asleep, can I? He’d kill me.” Padme smiled, patting his shoulder before heading into her own room. 

Obi-Wan barely counted ten minutes before he was completely out. 

For the first time in weeks, Obi-Wan woke to the sun pouring into the apartment, rather than the sound of his holo. Stretching briefly, he reached over to the table and saw that he had no messages waiting for him. His body felt lighter, the headache that seemed to take permanent residence in his head started to subside. 

“Good morning to you.” Padme said, dropping a cup of cafe in his hands, “I’m happy to report that you’ve slept past your mandated eight hours.” 

“What time is it?” 

“It’s just past lunch. And before you start to panic, I already told the senators that you took today off because it was a meditation day for Jedi.” 

“Jedi don’t have meditation days.” 

“I know that. But they don’t know that.” 

Obi-Wan laughed, taking a sip of his cafe. She was truly something else. 

“Do you have any plans for your day off?” she asked, pushing a tray of pastries in his direction. Obi-Wan realized that she really was going to make sure that he ate and slept from now on. 

“I should probably clean the apartment,” he mused, grabbing a chocolate-covered cake from the plate, “There’s probably an inch of dust on everything.” 

“Don’t you have a droid for that?” 

“Anakin won’t let us use one for cleaning. He says that it's not fair to them. Something about droid rights.” 

Padme barked a laugh, covering her mouth with her hand. 

“That is the most Ani thing ever.” 

“It really is.” 

Obi-Wan was about to launch into a story about how Anakin once yelled at him for not thanking a droid when there was a knock on Padme’s door. 

“Were you expecting someone?” Obi-Wan asked, reading the confusion on her face at the noise. 

“Not that I remember…” 

“Maybe it is one of your handmaidens?” 

“They would never knock. They all know the combination to get in.” 

“Possibility another senator?”

“The only person who might need me would be Bail. But he’s not one to show up unannounced. 

Obi-Wan stroked his beard. 

“Do you want me to answer for you? Just in case?” 

He saw the refusal brewing behind her eyes and started walking towards the door anyways. Padme was good with a blaster, but he was much better with his lightsaber. 

Echoing her words from the previous night, he replied with a smile, “I can’t have my boyfriend’s best friend dying on my watch.” 

Moving his hand to rest on his saber, he opened the door with the intent to strike if he needed. 

“Master Kenobi, I was not expecting you.” Chancellor Palpatine said, his eyebrows rising into his hairline, “I was looking for Senator Amidala. Is she home?”

Obi-Wan stared in stunned silence for a moment, his heart beating from the excess adrenaline in his system. 

“I am in the living room!” he heard Padme call, “Please come in!”

Stepping to the side, he allowed Palpatine to enter the apartment. Bowing his head in greetings, he led him to where Padme was sitting on the couch.    
“I do hope that I am not intruding,” Palpatine said, his eyes drifting to the blanket that was folded on the couch, “I merely came by to ask Padme how her speech for next week was coming along.” 

“Obi-Wan was just finishing up giving me some advice on it. Isn’t that right?” she responded, sending a glare towards the Jedi. 

“Of course,” he responded, thanking the force that he was gifted with the ability to improv, “I still think that as long as you strengthen your opening statement, you’ll have no problem swaying the vote.”

“I am glad to hear that your preparations are going well,” Palpatine said, moving to sit in an armchair across from her, “You have always been a powerful speaker.”

“I appreciate your kindness, Chancellor.” 

Obi-Wan, growing increasingly uncomfortable, decided that his exit was imminent. 

“I’ll leave you both to your discussions. I know that the Chancellor will have more insight than I. I wish you all the luck next week.”

“Thank you for your advice, I will make sure to heed it.”

Giving his goodbye to the Chancellor, he headed towards his speeder, already anticipating the angry call from Padme later about leaving her alone with Palpatine. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raise your hand if you also hate Palpy


	19. The Water

Over the next few weeks, “stopping by for tea” became a code between Obi-Wan and Padme. When the circles around Obi-Wan's eyes became more prominent than usual, Padme would invite Obi-Wan over for tea in a tone that left no room for arguments. The first few times that she had asked, Obi-Wan tried to resist. But Padme was not a woman who took “no” lightly. While he would always act like he was begrudgingly accepting the invite, Obi-Wan grew to see her apartment as a second home. The tea he loved was always in stock and without Anakin, her quarters served to be one of the only places that he could actually rest. 

His injuries began to heal, albeit slowly. Obi-Wan still walked with a considerable limp, meaning that the council still had not cleared him for active duty. He had tried to enter the training room and was swiftly kicked out by Vos and Shaak Ti. Most of Obi-Wan’s days were spent helping senators and wrangling younglings in the creche. It was not the exciting days of battle that he was used to. But the Jedi master was thankful that he could remain on the same planet as Anakin. 

As he walked through the temple, he couldn’t help but notice how empty it had become. With every able-bodied Jedi out fighting, there were very few Jedi left to roam the hallways. His footsteps echoed off of the stone floors and he tried not to wince at the sound. Obi-Wan was not one to feel nervous, or at least, he was not one to outwardly show it. But he couldn’t help fiddling with his hands as he walked. He promised Ahsoka that he would stop by her apartment once she returned from her mission with Plo Koon. He was partially excited to see her, but the fact that he would be stepping into a space that was once Anakin’s made his stomach turn. He had to stay strong, for Ahsoka’s sake. 

Breathing his feelings into the force, he punched in the code to the apartment. 

“Master!” Ahsoka greeted him, walking over to pull him into a hug, “You’ll never believe what happened on my mission!”

“Hello to you too, young one.” Obi-Wan said, squeezing her tight against his chest, “I’m guessing the mission was successful?”

“More than that!” she replied, leading the Jedi master over to the couch, “Master Koon let me call that shots.”

“And how was that?”

“At first I messed up,” she confided, “But I remembered all the times you told me to think before acting and it actually worked!”

Obi-Wan laughed, shaking his head lightly. At least one of his padawans tried to actually take his advice. 

“The Separatists were closing in on our base. Master Koon really wanted to retreat but I said that we should try to sneak around and surprise them from the back.” 

“I’m guessing it worked?”

“I cut down almost a hundred droids. I can’t wait to tell Skyguy.” 

The mention of Anakin created a silence between them, both fidgeting slightly in their seats. 

“How is he doing?” Ahsoka asked, her voice getting very quiet. 

“He still hasn’t woken up,” Obi-Wan began, moving to play with the frayed sleeves of his robes, “He’s making progress though. A few days ago, it seemed like he smiled when I said his name.” 

“Really?”

“I swore that it was him. But Master Che said that sometimes there can be phantom movements.” 

He saw her shoulders slump slightly from the news. He knew that she was expecting something better. 

“But he is still making faster progress than anyone else. They say that he could possibly wake anytime within the next few weeks.”

“Do you think that he will?”

Obi-Wan smiled, reaching over to squeeze his grand-padawan’s hand. 

“When has Anakin ever missed a party?”

Ahsoka smiled, nodding her head in agreeance. Obi-Wan knew that she was hurting as well, but he couldn’t be prouder at how well she was handling it. For everything that the past year has sprung onto the teen, Obi-Wan felt a swell of pride at how quickly she was growing up. 

Ahsoka continued to fill Obi-Wan in on the rest of the mission. The Republic had taken control of another Separatist base, expanding their control in the Outer Rim. Many of the outlying planets were still at risk of being taken over, but this victory gave the Republic the upper hand in recruiting some of the surrounding, smaller planets. The mission helped to bring hope that the end of the war was coming soon. 

“Master,” Ahsoka asked, “What do you think will happen after the war?” 

“Hopefully a big celebration.”

Ahsoka sent a glare in his direction. 

“You know what I meant.” 

Obi-Wan signed, leaning back into the couch. Life after the war was something that he did not dwell on often. There were too many what-ifs, too many possibilities 

“I don’t know, Ahsoka,” he answered truthfully, “My master once told me that it was best to remain mindful of the present.”

“But isn’t it important to think about the future as well?” 

Obi-Wan smiled, recalling the same conversation he once had with Qui-Gon years ago. 

“All I can be sure of is that you, Anakin, and I will all be together.” 

“Is that a promise?”

“It very much is.” 

Ahsoka returned his smile, her force signature calming down slightly. Obi-Wan could imagine her fears about life after the war. Most of her time in the temple was spent either fighting or under the threat of war. He was hopeful that sometime soon, she’d be able to experience true peace in the galaxy. 

“You know what I’d really like to do after the war,” she began, leaning her head to rest on her hands slightly, “I’d love to visit the Separatist planets. I want to see them without thinking that they’re the enemy.” 

“I think that’s something that’s very possible.”

“Would you and Anakin come?” 

“If we are able, I can promise you that there is nowhere else we’d rather be.” 

Obi-Wan stayed with Ahsoka for a few hours, the pair engaging in their normal banter. Ahsoka told him stories of what the clones do behind their general’s backs and Obi-Wan recalled moments from his time with Qui-Gon. Sitting with Ahsoka gave him a sense of normalcy, but it made his heartache for his lover even more. Giving her one last hug, and a reminder to start on her coursework, Obi-Wan made the trek back to his own apartment. 

He had barely moved anything since he had gotten back. Anakin’s droid parts were still scattered around the room, laying stagnant like awful decorations. His old boots rested near the door and even though Obi-Wan tripped over them constantly, he couldn’t bring himself to put them away. The only thing he managed to do was clear off the layer of dust that settled around the apartment. Sighing, he pulled off his robes and headed towards his room. 

He had not taken out his box of memories in months. It had sat alone under his bed, serving as a reminder of his past. But something tugged at the back of his mind, urging him to open it once again. He tried to ignore it, settling down to meditate. But his mind kept drifting. Knowing that mediation was futile, he pulled out the emerald box. 

The book from Qui-Gon seemed to sing at him the second he opened the lid. In the decade that he had the book, Obi-Wan had never felt compelled to read it. But now, it was the only task that he could focus on. With slightly shaking hands, he smoothed his hands over the worn leather cover. For a moment, he pictured Qui-Gon’s hands on the book and he bit his lip in order to not cry. 

He idly flipped through the pages, feeling how delicate the paper had become over the years. Some of the pages were dog-eared and marked, the book was clearly well-loved. He settled on a chapter titled, “The Water” and began to read. 

The chapter followed the story of a young human who fell in love with a Nautolan. The man came from a wealthy family on a desert planet. His destiny was to rule the planet after his father’s demise. But his heart was stolen by a Nautolan handmaiden who had visited his castle with a traveling queen. For months, he yearned for the girl. He thought only of her deep ebony eyes and soft green skin. 

He sent for her, promising her a life of luxury and jewels with him on the desert planet. She accepted and moved to the castle. The pair quickly fell in love and the man thought that he had everything. But slowly, his love began to fade. She was meant for the water, not sand. Her skin began to crack, the vibrant green of her skin dulling. Each day, the sun seemed to suck the light out of her. 

Eventually, the man had to make a decision. His father was on the verge of dying and his lover could not survive on the planet much longer. He could leave and be with her, or fulfill his duty. For days, he weighed his options. The desert was his home and being the only heir, he had an obligation to his people. But the thought of losing the only person he’s ever loved was crushing. In the end, the man was able to find a way to compromise. He lived off-world with his lover but appointed a regent to rule in his place. The man would visit the planet once a year and would attend monthly hearings on the state of the planet. 

Obi-Wan could tell that the story was meant to teach younglings the importance of compromise and diplomacy. But the small note, written in Qui-Gon’s unmistakable handwriting caught his eyes. 

It was a statement that he once said to Obi-Wan, years and years ago. 

_ Moving on doesn’t mean letting go.  _

A chill ran up his spine as the breath was almost forced out of his lungs. He knew that the message was supposed to be about him and Satine. He always believed that his only options were being a Jedi or being in-love. In the past, he could not see any other way. But now, after everything that has happened to him, he knew that Qui-Gon was right. 

Love is not meant to be conditional. 

With tears pouring down his face, he traced the words with his fingers. He felt closer to Qui-Gon in that moment than he had in his entire life. 

“Thank you,” he whispered out loud, feeling as if Qui-Gon was listening. 

Drying his tears, he packed away the book and the box. 

He needed to see Anakin.


	20. The Shadows

Seeing Anakin surrounded by machines had not gotten easier over the weeks. It always managed to knock the wind straight from Obi-Wan’s chest. Master Che had gotten used to his presence in the Halls of Healing, always giving him a polite nod when he entered. She knew better than to argue against him coming. Settling down in the chair next to Anakin’s bed, he idly interlocked their fingers, rubbing his thumb along the back of his hand. He wasn’t sure what pulled him to see Anakin, but his presence was already calming the swirling of emotions in his gut. Checking to make sure that no one was watching, he pressed his lips to Anakin’s hand. 

“I talked to Ahsoka about life after the war,” Obi-Wan began, his hands traveling to gently comb through Anakin’s curls, “She wants to travel more. I told her that if we’re able, we’d travel with her. There’s so much more that we all have to see.” 

Obi-Wan moved his hand to stroke at Anakin’s cheekbones, moving his thumb down to his jawline. Even in his state, Obi-Wan thought that he was the most beautiful man that he’s ever seen. 

“I can’t wait to explore the galaxy with you, Anakin Skywalker.” 

Hearing footsteps approaching, he removed his hands from Anakin with a reluctant sigh. 

“Master Kenobi, I see that you are healing well.” Vokara said with a smile, moving closer to Anakin’s bed, “I noticed that your limp has started to fade.” 

“I think every Jedi in the temple has been making sure that I stay rested.” 

The twi’lek raised an eyebrow at him, a smirk on her face. 

“Then they have been following my instructions well.” 

They both shared a laugh. Jedi may be brave, but not many were brave enough to disobey an order from Vokara Che. 

“I believe that he’ll be waking up very soon,” she began, tweaking the dials on the machines around him, “His reports showed a huge spike in brain activity. His small movements and twitches throughout the day give me nothing but good signs.” 

Obi-Wan had to restrain himself from getting up and squeezing the healer with all the strength in his body. 

“That is wonderful news,” Obi-Wan replied, his smile threatening to split his face in two. “What will be the protocol once he wakes?” 

“He won’t be up and walking the second he opens his eyes,” she warned, “He will likely need time to adjust. He’ll need lots of rest and someone to watch over him as he regains the strength in his muscles.” 

“And his hand?”

“The new hand has already come in. It is an exact replica of his previous one.” 

Obi-Wan smiled again, looking down at Anakin. An overwhelming sense of hope crashing over him. After Vokara had confirmed that everything was in order, she took her leave. 

Obi-Wan was about to launch into a story about Ahsoka when he heard his comm go off. 

“Master Yoda, how can I be of assistance?” he asked the blue holo of the Jedi master. 

“Emergency meeting, there is. Your presence we need, immediately.” 

“I’ll be right there.” 

The call ended suddenly, leaving Obi-Wan with an odd feeling. The council very rarely called meetings this abruptly, let alone so far into the evening. He breathed his emotions into the force, hoping that this meeting did not pertain to anyone he held dear. 

He squeezed Anakin’s hand one last time and swore that Anakin returned the gesture. 

As he entered the council chambers, he saw that every master was already seated. He felt a flash of self-consciousness on being the last one in the room. The master moved to take his seat. 

“Please stand.” was the order that came from Mace. He sat stoically in his seat, an air of unease filling the room. 

“Master Kenobi,” he began, his voice slightly shaking, “We have had some unsettling reports come in about you.” 

“Unsettling?” Obi-Wan replied, feeling as if the floor beneath him was about to swallow him whole. 

“There have been some reports that you may not be upholding the Jedi code.” 

Obi-Wan felt the color drain from his face. The edges of his vision began to turn black and he had to fight to make sure that he didn’t pass out directly on the spot. 

“I-I’m not sure what you’re referring to,” he replied, cursing at himself for his shaking voice, “May I ask what these concerns are?”

“A relationship with someone, it is rumored you have,” Yoda said, a clawed hand running along his chin, “Troubling, this matter is.” 

“And who am I rumored to have a relationship with?”

Obi-Wan braced himself. He was ready for the punishment. He was ready for the look of pure disappointment and shame on the faces of the other masters. He took a deep breath. 

“It has come to our attention that you may be in a relationship with Senator Amidala.” 

“ _ Excuse me _ ?” Obi-Wan barked out a laugh, not even covering it with his hand. He stood wide-eyed at the council, shock clearly evident on his face. “I don’t understand where this is coming from.” 

The tension in Mace’s shoulders seemed to ease, the pure confusion dripping from Obi-Wan’s force signature was telling. 

“We have reports of you entering and leaving the senator’s apartment over the past few weeks. Can you explain that?” 

_ Kriff _ . Obi-Wan racked his brain, quickly coming up with a lie. He couldn’t say,  _ well my boyfriend is in a coma and I can’t sleep without the presence of another person, so I drink tea and stay the night sometimes. _ He came up with the next best thing, praying to the force that Padme wouldn’t kill him for it. 

“Senator Amidala had asked me to keep this between us, but I’m afraid that I have been careless in my actions,” he began, noting how all eyes of the council were on him, “Since the Separatists attacks have increased, Senator Amidala has been feeling more fearful for her life.”

“And what does that have to do with you in her quarters?”

“She had asked me to keep watch over her since I am off active duty. Padme had asked me to not report this to anyone, as she did not want to make a fuss over it. We all remember how she was after the first attack on her life, don’t we?”

A murmur of agreeance ran throughout the council members. Obi-Wan could see them all visibly relax more and more as he spun the tale. 

“On the nights where she feels threatened or scared, I had told her to reach out to me. I felt as if it was a very small price to pay for her help with the Republic.” 

“Following the code, you are,” Yoda said, relief surging through his voice, “Apologize for this meeting, we do.” 

“No apology needed,” Obi-Wan smiled, feeling the sweat pouring down his back, “We must all analyze our actions in the larger scheme of things. I apologize for not alerting the council of this request from Senator Amidala earlier.” 

“Please keep us updated if the senator requires more protection,” Mace added, nodding towards the other Jedi, “The council will all heed her call if you are unable to assist.” 

“I will surely pass on the word.” 

Yoda dismissed the meeting. As the council filed out, the other members smiled broadly at him, even squeezing his shoulders. They were relieved to find that Obi-Wan was innocent. 

Obi-Wan remained in a daze as he walked to his apartment. The second he heard the door close, he collapsed on the ground. He curled into himself, his chest heaving. Obi-Wan could not believe what had just happened. The adrenaline still lingered in his bones, causing him the shake. He felt like his nerves were on fire and yet, completely numb at the same time. He reached idly for his commlink, calling the only person he could think of. 

“Obi-Wan, is everything okay?” Padme asked, her eyes filling with concern on the holo, “You’ve never called this late before.” 

“I just came back from a meeting with the council.” 

“Are they sending you off-world? Is Anakin okay?” 

Obi-Wan sucked in a breath, figuring that it was easier to get to the point. 

“They accused you and me of being in a relationship.”

“They  _ what _ ?” 

“Apparently someone had seen me entering and leaving your apartment over the past few weeks.”

“Any idea of who?”

“No...and that is what I’m afraid of.”

Padme exhaled loudly as she pinched the bridge of her nose. Obi-Wan felt a pang of guilt at the fact that he was adding more stress to the senator’s plate. 

“What did you tell the council?”

“You’re not going to like this,” Obi-Wan started, rubbing a hand across his neck, “I said that you were afraid of another attack on your life so I had been keeping watch.”

“Did the council buy it?”

“Completely. They asked me to pass along the word that they’re always happy to help.”   


“Then I can’t be too upset,” Padme smiled, “I’m just grateful that it was me under suspicion and not Anakin.”

“I agree. I’m just concerned that my whereabouts are being so closely monitored.”

“You need to be careful, Obi-Wan. Something is not right here.”

“You need to be careful as well. This was as much about me as it was you.”

Padme sighed again, crossing her arms in front of her chest. 

“Many years ago, someone told me that the Jedi were nothing but trouble. I’m starting to see their point.”

“Padme, I’m sorry, I never meant-”

The senator cut him off with a wave of her hand and her signature warm smile. 

“I happen to like trouble.”

The pair exchanged goodbyes and Obi-Wan clicked the comm off with a sigh. That night he slept with all the lights on, afraid of what was lurking in the shadows. 

The Jedi master’s paranoia only seemed to increase over the coming days. He was constantly looking over his shoulder, ready to attack some unseen enemy. It seemed as if his hand was permanently stationed atop his saber. Someone was tracking his and Padme’s movements and he’d be damned if he let it continue to happen. During his trips to the senate building, Obi-Wan’s eyes would scan the senate chambers, searching for anything out of place. He’d watch over Padme, waiting to see a figure inching closer and closer. For all his searching, he never felt a single disturbance in the force. And that was what worried him most. 

While he was still concerned with his mysterious stalker, he was pleased to find that Master Che had cleared him to train. His limp was considerably less noticeable and he could walk longer distances without shooting pain. While Master Che did stress the importance of  _ light _ training, Obi-Wan was still excited that he could enter the training rooms without being escorted out. The Jedi master was itching to use his saber again and was more than happy to assist Ahsoka in a few new training exercises. 

“Your form has gotten considerably stronger.” he praised as Ahsoka moved to strike him from behind, “But you still need to master the element of surprise, young one.” 

He smiled as he easily blocked her blow, barely moving from the center of the mat. Ahsoka grunted, leaping over to face the master head-on. She charged forward, her dual-blades swinging rapidly. Their sabers clashed in a brilliant mesh of blue and green. 

“You need to reign in your feelings when you fight,” Obi-Wan said, panting slightly as he tried to keep up with the padawan, “You act too quickly.”

“I think you don’t act quick enough,” Ahsoka replied, aiming a strike that grazed Obi-Wan’s torso, “I think you’re getting old.”

Obi-Wan cocked an eyebrow, a grin spreading across his face.  _ Oh, she wanted to play that kind of game.  _

Ignoring Master Che’s warning, he used the force to leap above her, swinging his blade extremely close to her montrails. As he looked at her shocked expression, he lazily raised his hand and called one of her sabers towards him. Now with two sabers in hand, he charged forwards. 

“Fine, fine. I yield!” Ahsoka said, her eyes slightly rolling. 

“What was that about being old?” Obi-Wan asked as he tossed back her saber, a smirk glued on his face. 

“I was going to say that-”

Ahsoka was interrupted by Obi-Wan’s comm going off, the shrill beeping making them both jump slightly. The face of Vokara Che was displayed in front of him. 

“Master Kenobi, Anakin is awake.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting close to the end, y'all. I have about 3(ish) more chapters planned. Thank you all so so SO much for being on this journey with me. I couldn't have asked for a better set of readers <3


	21. Awake

Obi-Wan’s body moved before his mind could even process the information. The world around him went blank, for a brief moment, Obi-Wan swore that his heart stopped. He heard Ahsoka’s footsteps chasing after him. He wanted to tell her to stay behind, to wait for him to comm her. But he wasn’t a cruel man. 

_ She wouldn’t listen anyway _ , he thought to himself,  _ she’s too much like Anakin _ . 

As the Halls of Healing grew closer, he did his best to shield his feelings. Creating a steady rhythm of inhale-exhale-inhale-exhale, he attempted to construct his normally cool facade. His entire body was an electric storm and he had to pass himself off as just another sunny day. With a final exhale, he walked into Anakin’s room. 

“Well Obi-Wan, it took you long enough to get down here,” Anakin smiled, his voice sounding rougher than normal, “I was beginning to think that you forgot about me.” 

Obi-Wan stood frozen, his mouth open and gaping. He doubted that even Master Yoda could have broken his stare. Though Anakin’s cheeks were more hollowed than he’d ever seen them, the light that shone from behind his blue eyes was mesmerizing. He watched as Anakin fiddled with his mechno-arm, his body still looking dangerously frail. 

“Master Che won’t be back for a few minutes, you know. She said that she was going to check-” 

Obi-Wan’s barely heard the rest of Anakin’s sentence. Reaching out quickly through the force, he confirmed that no one was near. 

He put a tentative hand on Anakin’s chin, lifting his head so their eyes met. The Jedi master smiled down at his lover, still enthralled by his beauty. Their lips melted together, a collective sigh coming from the both of them. Mindful of his injuries, Obi-Wan gently tangled his hand in Anakin’s curls, pulling him even closer. Obi-Wan was flooded with an overwhelming sense of safety. Of Love. Of being  _ home _ . He pulled away, resting their foreheads together.

“I missed you so much, dear one,” he said, ignoring the tear that slid down his cheek. Anakin caught it with his thumb, gently cradling his face. 

“I missed you too.” 

Obi-Wan pressed another kiss to his lips. As long as he lived, he swore that he’d never take the feeling for granted again. 

“I didn’t get to say it back, you know,” Anakin said as he pulled away, his thumb caressing Obi-Wan’s cheekbone. 

“Say what?”

“That I love you too.” 

“If you two are going to continue to be this gross, I’m going to put myself into a coma.”

The pair broke apart quickly, matching blushes rising in their cheeks. While Ahsoka’s tone spoke of annoyance, the tears welling in her bright blue eyes told another story. 

“Come here, Snips,” Anakin said, opening his arms. The little togruta bounded over, wrapping her arms around him. Obi-Wan watched as she kept herself from squeezing too hard, feeling the bandages wrapped around his torso. Anakin rubbed her back lightly as she shook, unable to stop herself from crying. It was such a tender moment that Obi-Wan almost felt guilty witnessing it. 

“Don’t ever do that again, Anakin,” she said softly, wiping her eyes. 

“You’re telling me that you didn’t enjoy your break from my antics?” 

Ahsoka could have killed with a glare she sent towards him. 

“Ahsoka,” he said gently, resting his flesh hand on top of hers, “I promise I won’t.”

She gave a tearful nod, leaning down to give him one last hug. The force around the three of them was vibrating, the strength of having them all together again was astounding. 

“Did you just wake up?” Obi-Wan asked, dragging two chairs towards Anakin’s bed. 

“No, I woke up a few hours ago,” Anakin raised a hand to stop the inevitable protest from the two next to him, “And before you say anything, Master Che threatened to keep me here an extra week if I called either of you down.”

Obi-Wan gave a laugh.  _ Vokara was a smart woman. _

“How are you feeling?” he asked, his gaze softening. 

“I’ve been better,” Anakin replied honestly, “I feel very drained.”

“Considering what you went through, that makes total sense.” Ahsoka said, the corners of her mouth turning upwards slightly, “You practically absorbed enough electricity to power Coruscant for a week.” 

“Trust me, it felt like it.”

Silence lapsed between them. Each of their gazes casting towards the ground. 

“Do you...do you remember anything?” she gently asked, her thumbs twiddling in her lap. 

“Not much,” he said, reaching next to him to take a sip of water, “I remember stabbing the power cell and then this intense flash of pain. After that? Not much.” 

Ahsoka nodded, accepting the answer. 

“Do you want to hear about my mission with Master Koon?” she asked. 

“I would love to. The two of you better fill me in with that I missed.” 

The rest of the day was spent recalling what had transpired while he was asleep. As news slowly spread that Anakin was awake, visitors popped their heads in. Padme even excused herself from an important senate meeting to welcome Anakin back. The senator strode into the room, swatted Anakin on the head, promised to kill him herself if he did anything like that again, and then pulled him into a hug. 

_ Classic Padme _ . 

Chancellor Palpatine eventually made his way through as well. As he entered the room, he looked surprised to see both Obi-Wan and Ahsoka already there. His visit was brief, much to Obi-Wan’s relief. He still felt slimy every time the politician was around. 

“Alright you two, Skywalker here needs his rest.” Vokara Che said, standing in the doorway with a hand on her hip, “And before you ask, no, you cannot have five more minutes.” 

Obi-Wan and Ahsoka rose from their seats, neither of them ready to challenge the healer entirely. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Obi-Wan said, resisting the urge to pull him into another hug, “Please get some rest in the meantime.”

“He will,” replied Master Che from the doorway, her foot tapping lightly against the marble floors. Sharing a smile with Anakin, he and Ahsoka left the Halls of Healing, and for the first night in a long time, Obi-Wan fell asleep instantly. 

The next few months seemed to pass in a blink of an eye. Obi-Wan was cleared for light-duty, though he was not quite ready for intense battle just yet. His missions were mostly diplomatic in nature. He often traveled to planets with war-torn fronts and helped local governments pick up the pieces. While he was involved in a few skirmishes of his own, but it was not the life-or-death situations of before. He mainly contributed to the war effort with strategy, meeting weekly with Commander Cody to discuss new plans. Part of him wished he was back on the frontlines, risking it all for the Republic. But the other part of him, the part of him that had been growing for the better part of the year, was profoundly grateful that he and Anakin were out of the line of fire. 

Anakin was temple-bound, with strict orders from both Vokara Che and the council to focus on his healing, rather than the war. Obi-Wan knew that it was killing him to be so separated from his men, but his time asleep meant that Anakin had lost a significant amount of muscle. Charging headfirst into a throng of droids while being nothing but skin and bones was a death sentence, a sentence that he was glad that Anakin understood. 

Besides his daily training, Anakin spent a lot of time with the Chancellor, much to Obi-Wan’s dismay. Due to his prolonged stay, the chancellor always found a reason to be near the boy. He’d often ask Anakin’s opinion on battle plans, new bills, and senators. Most of the time, Anakin found himself tangled in the web of politics. The Chancellor would invite him to political galas and balls. Though Obi-Wan knew the events made Anakin squirm, he also knew that his lover did not want to disappoint the man he so dearly looked up to. 

“You’re home early,” Anakin said with a smile as Obi-Wan entered the apartment, “I thought you said that you wouldn’t be home for a few more standard hours.”

“With the way Master Koth was droning on, I assumed that I would have been.”

“That bad?” he asked, noting the way Obi-Wan unceremoniously flopped onto their couch. 

“It just seems like we're falling behind. We keep winning battles, but it feels like we’re losing the war.” 

“What do you mean?” asked Anakin, joining him on the couch. 

“Sure, we win battles, but at what cost? We’re losing men faster than we can replace them and the clones we're sending to the front aren’t getting the training they deserve.” 

“Every battle won is a step closer to the end.” 

“But what will be left of the Republic when this is all over?”

“The Republic will always stand. We both know that.” 

Obi-Wan sighed, rubbing a tired hand over his face. His blue eyes were bloodshot, the result of trying to stay focused during another droning council meeting. 

“There’s something else, isn’t there?” Anakin asked, eyeing the tension in Obi-Wan’s shoulders. 

“They asked me to aid in Vos’s efforts on Boz Pity. His troops are in dire need of relief.” 

“And I’m guessing there’s no other Jedi available?”

“Not a single one.”

It was Anakin’s turn to sigh. 

“Are you confident that you’re okay to return to the field?”

“Confident? No.” Obi-Wan gave a bitter laugh, “But what choice do I have? Leave Quinlan to watch his men die?”

“There really isn’t a good answer here, is there?”

“Nope.” 

Anakin moved to lay in his head in Obi-Wan’s lap. The older man taking to playing with his hair idly. 

“I also asked to take Ahsoka. I’m sorry if you wanted her at the temple.” 

“She’ll learn more in the field than here in the dojo with me,” Anakin said, humming lightly at Obi-Wan’s touch, “She is as much of your padawan as she is mine, you know.” 

Obi-Wan gave a gentle laugh. 

“I suppose you’re right.” 

“Do I dare ask when you both ship out?” 

“Tomorrow morning.” 

The force around Anakin soured quickly, despite his efforts to reel his feelings back. Obi-Wan tried to convince the council to prolong the departure, but the situation on Boz Pity was growing bleaker by the day. 

“I guess we’ll just have to settle for enjoying tonight,” Anakin said, not bothering to hide the spite in his voice. 

Obi-Wan grunted in agreeance, his mind wandering as he continued to play with his hair. He tried to enjoy the weight of Anakin in his lap, savoring the feeling of being so close to the one he loved. More than anything, he tried to convince himself that this wouldn’t be the last time he’d hold Anakin like this. 

After eating a quick dinner and showering, the pair found themselves tangled in bed. Anakin’s head rested against Obi-Wan’s chest, his hand tracing circles into the bare flesh. Obi-Wan felt his heart beating faster, always so in tune with the man next to him. 

“When the war is over, do you think the council will let us take a year's sabbatical at the same time?”

“They better,” Obi-Wan smiled, his hand resting on the small of Anakin’s back, “I think almost every senior Jedi is going to need a long break after this.” 

“Any idea of what you want to do?” 

“There are two things that I’d like to do. If they were okay with you, of course.” 

Anakin turned his head, cocking an eyebrow to urge Obi-Wan to continue. 

“I never got to visit Satine’s grave. After Maul, returning to Mandalore wasn’t an option. So I’d like the say my final goodbyes to her.” He took a deep breath, steadying himself before continuing, “And I’d very much like to visit your mother’s grave. I never got to meet her in person, but Qui-Gon spoke very highly of her.” 

He felt Anakin still at the mention of his mother and of returning to Tatooine. Praying to the force, Obi-Wan hoped that he didn’t ruin the moment. 

“You would really want to do that?” 

“Your mother, and your family there, are a part of you Anakin. When I said that I love you, I meant every part of you.” 

He didn’t have a second to catch his breath before Anakin moved up to capture his lips. The taller man leaned his body on top of his, moving a hand to curl around Obi-Wan’s neck. Obi-Wan sighed into the kiss, his nails scratching light lines down Anakin’s back. Anakin was not good at expressing himself through words. His actions always did the talking. 

Deepening the kiss, Obi-Wan flipped them over so he was on top. He kissed alongside Anakin’s jawline and down his neck. Reaching his collarbone, he sucked a deep purple bruise into the soft skin there. Above him, he saw Anakin raise a brow at the gesture. 

“Just marking what’s mine until I return.” Obi-Wan replied, his voice raspy, “In case you forget.” 

“I may need a few reminders then.” 

Obi-Wan cast him a wicked grin, dipping his head to suck marks down his chest and stomach. He watched as goosebumps spread across Anakin’s skin. Obi-Wan ground his hips down, a joint moaning escaping both of them as their clothed erections touched. 

“ _ Fuck Obi-Wan. _ ” Anakin breathed, his chest heaving. 

Obi-Wan laughed into Anakin’s neck, licking a stripe to his ear. He moved his hand to cup Anakin’s cock, moving so his lips were dangerously close to the other man’s ear. 

“I’m going to fuck you into this mattress, dear one. You won’t be able to walk without thinking of me for days.” 

Anakin moaned beneath him, his body arching into Obi-Wan’s touch. Obi-Wan heard a weak curse and a “ _ please _ ” escape the young man’s mouth. Smiling at how he could still unravel Anakin, he made quick work of the sleep pants he was wearing. 

Reaching into the nightstand by his bed, Obi-Wan grabbed a small bottle of oil. Warming the liquid in his hands, he moved down Anakin’s body. Parting his legs with his hands, he nestled between them. Looking up, his breath hitched at the sight of Anakin. A thin layer of sweat coated his body, his curls plastered to his forehead. His cheeks held a light blush, his plump lips parted and swollen. 

_ Breathtaking _ , was the only thought in Obi-Wan’s head. 

He pressed a kiss to Anakin’s hipbone, running a hand over his ass before entering a single finger. 

“Oh force, yes.” he heard Anakin moan above him, his back lifting off the bed at the intrusion. Obi-Wan sucked another mark into his stomach, slowly moving his finger in and out, making sure to curl his finger. When he felt Anakin’s body was used to a single finger, he slowly entered a second. 

Obi-Wan loved to take his time with Anakin. Here, the normally impatient man was completely at his mercy. Every moan and whine was drawn from his actions, the noises going straight to his cock. He watched as Anakin thrashed beneath him as he added a third finger, his fingers finding the perfect spot inside of him. 

“There. Fuck, right there.” Anakin breathed, his voice breaking slightly on the last word. 

“Do you want my cock?” Obi-Wan asked with an air of cockiness, using his free hand to tilt Anakin’s chin up to meet his gaze, “Do you want me to fuck you until all you can remember is my name?”

“Yes, _ Master _ .” 

Obi-Wan moaned loudly at the title, pulling his fingers from Anakin. Grabbing the bottle of oil, he coated his own cock, his eyes closing as he stroked himself. He lined himself up with Anakin. 

“Ready, love?” 

Anakin nodded, biting his lip as he did so. 

Obi-Wan moaned as he entered Anakin, his head falling forward at the sensation. 

“ _ Fuck you’re so tight. _ ” he praised, his voice strained. 

He started his pace out slow, feeling the way Anakin’s walls squeezed his cock impossibly tight. His hand swirled around Anakin’s nipple, he leaned down to suck on the pebbled flesh. Anakin moaned loudly, his body arching again into the touch. 

Satisfied that Anakin was used to the stretch of his cock, Obi-Wan pulled out, noting the way Anakin pouted at the feeling. Before the man had time to protest, he thrust in  _ hard _ . 

“Obi-Wan!” Anakin cried, his hands fisting into the sheets, “More like that, please.” 

Obi-Wan smirked, pulling out again before driving into Anakin hard. He created a brutal pace, the sound of their slapping skin echoing throughout the small room. Obi-Wan moved to throw Anakin’s legs over his shoulder, allowing himself to go even deeper into him. 

“Can you cum just like this?” Obi-Wan asked, pulling Anakin into a messy kiss, “Can you cum just from my cock.” 

Anakin’s eyes widened at the thought, a moan passing through his lips at the thought. He nodded again, his words failing him. 

“ _ Good boy _ .” Obi-Wan praised again, pressing a light kiss to his forehead. 

Pounding hard into Anakin, he angled himself to reach that spot inside of him. He watched as Anakin lifted himself off of the bed at the feeling, his jaw falling slack. A myriad of curses left his lips, his nails pressing into Obi-Wan’s shoulders. 

Obi-Wan pounded into him harder, his teeth sinking into Anakin’s chest. 

“You are the most beautiful creature in this galaxy,” he said, his thrusts coming faster and faster, “You look so pretty with my cock stuffed deep in you.” 

Anakin moaned again, his head falling back into the pillows. 

“I’m so close. Fuck, Obi-Wan-”

The older Jedi laughed, kissing Anakin with such a force that their teeth clashed. 

“Cum for me, Anakin.” 

Obi-Wan thrust a few more times before Anakin squeezed his eyes shut, a loud gasp exploding from his mouth. Obi-Wan felt the force around them swell and burst, Anakin cumming hard onto his stomach with a shout of “ _ Obi-Wan! _ ”. 

If he was a much younger man, the sound of Anakin moaning his name might have been enough. His rhythm was becoming more sporadic, his thrusts coming harder and harder. Beneath him, he felt Anakin pull him down into another kiss. The younger man kissed down his neck, biting down lightly on his collarbone. 

“ _ Fuck Anakin _ ,” he growled, the tightness in his stomach growing. He flipped Anakin onto his stomach, pulling him onto his knees. Without hesitation, he thrust back into him, his hands gripping bruises into Anakin’s hip. 

The new position had Anakin moaning, even more, his body drinking up every sensation. 

“You’re so perfect” Obi-Wan babbled into Anakin’s shoulder, “Force, you’re going to make me cum.” 

“ _ Please. _ ” Anakin whined, moving so his body met every thrust. 

Obi-Wan moaned as the light behind his eyes exploded. Pulling out, he came along Anakin’s ass, painting the tanned skin was ropes of his cum. 

The pair stood frozen for a second, the sound of their panting filling the room. Obi-Wan used the force to call over a towel, wiping the both of them clean. 

“You weren’t lying when you said that I’d be feeling this for days.” Anakin laughed, rolling back over on his back. 

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No, no!” Anakin promises, pressing a light kiss to his cheek, “It was perfect.” 

“Just making sure.” 

Anakin purred in agreeance. Laying on his back, Anakin opened his arms. 

“Come here, I want to hold you tonight.” 

Obi-Wan smiled, always amazed at the man that was Anakin Skywalker. He rested his head in the crook of Anakin’s chest, enjoying the feeling of Anakin’s hands in his own hair. 

The war could wait until tomorrow. 


End file.
